Pool on my Divorce

[Devildog]

All right folks, we are getting down to the wire here. Less than a week until the divorce is final.

 

So place your bets before Tuesday, what will the XW reaction be?

 

A) More tears, blaming me.

 

B) Question why I'm not more torn up, Didn't our marriage mean anything to me?

 

C) Walk away without a word

 

D) Try to be all friendly like nothing happened

 

E) Do backflips and somersaults out the courtroom

 

Let's see who can guess right

[Ladyjane14]

Originally posted by Devildog

All right folks, we are getting down to the wire here. Less than a week until the divorce is final.

 

So place your bets before Tuesday, what will the XW reaction be?

 

A) More tears, blaming me.

 

B) Question why I'm not more torn up, Didn't our marriage mean anything to me?

 

C) Walk away without a word

 

D) Try to be all friendly like nothing happened

 

E) Do backflips and somersaults out the courtroom

 

Let's see who can guess right

 

Can I pick more that one? How about if I'm specific in which particular order? 'Cause I'm thinking (D), followed by (A), and finally (B). I doubt she'll go for ©, I imagine she'll want to get the last word in if she can.

 

But I highly recommend (E) for YOU...that is if you feel up to it.

 

I hope you're doing well. I know you're prepared, but it still can't be easy.

[Devildog]

So far, I have been doing fine and getting somewhat anxious. But Tuesday, when it becomes real might be an entirely different story. Time will tell.

[Ladyjane14]

So what exactly happens on Tuesday? Will this be an initial court appearance? Or is it more of a finalization of settlement?

[Lonestar]

Well, if you both have attorneys and they will behandling the legalities, I believe it will be

 

© Walk away without a word.

 

The finalization of a divorce is kind of "stunning." Later on you might get some emotion from her.

 

I see most people on the divorce floor (the boulevard of broken dreams) walking around in a defeated zombie-like state. Everyone is trying desperately to hold in their emotions and appear strong.

 

Good luck, Devildog. You are about to enter a new chapter of your life. I'm getting a little choked up right now. I never wanted my second divorce and I feel a lot of sympathy (or would that be empathy) for others going through the same thing.

 

Once the divorce is final, a world of stress will be lifted off of you. Breathe deep!

[billybadass36]

True story. I was in Court two weeks ago on an uncontested motion for one of my clients, and there were a number of divorce settlements being put on the record ahead of me. I don't run in that circle at all, and I was surprised to note that at the conclusion of each divorce matter, a bailiff would escort each of the parties to the divorce from the courthouse to their vehicles ostensibly for their protection from each other, but I got the opportunity to ask the judge why that was, and he told me it was to minimize the amount of "crying, yelling, and other types of carrying on" in his courtroom.

[Devildog]

To the best of my knowledge, the judge asks a few questions, signs something, pronounces us ex-husband and wife, we get the papers stamped by the County Clerk, and it's over. That is what should be happening on Tuesday.

 

At this point, I see it as nothing more than a legality. The marriage has been over for months, we have already pretty much got everything set up during the separation, divided up property, worked out how custody will work and have been following that already. This just makes it legal.

 

And it frees me psychologically to pursue my own life as I see fit, with whomever I choose, when I choose, and not have to worry about it being used against me.

[alphamale]

Originally posted by Devildog

To the best of my knowledge, the judge asks a few questions, signs something, pronounces us ex-husband and wife, we get the papers stamped by the County Clerk, and it's over.

One of those questions, DEVILDAWG, will be if your soon-to-be ex-wife is pregnant to your knowledge.

[whichwayisup]

A) More tears, blaming me.

 

B) Question why I'm not more torn up, Didn't our marriage mean anything to me?

 

C) Walk away without a word

 

D) Try to be all friendly like nothing happened

 

E) Do backflips and somersaults out the courtroom

 

What a sick question!! But kinda weird-funny in a twisted way???

 

I think a combo and then some other stuff in there. Mixture goes like this, sadness maybe some tears, some regret - wishes that it could have worked out.

 

The exit? Either walk away without a word with tears, or friendly, with some tears.

 

AND, you may not know how you're gonna feel until it is all done that day.

[billybadass36]

Yes, they do ask her if she's pregnant or if she may be pregnant. First time I heard this I thought it was odd, but it makes a lot of sense to get an admission of her not being pregnant on the record on the date of divorce.

[Mz. Pixie]

They asked that in my papers.

 

Neither of us are having to attend court. Our attorney's will walk the papers over to have them signed by the judge- providing the judge agrees with everything.

 

For me, it was mixed feelings. I'm told this is normal. I felt nervous and kind of sick to my stomach. Add that to the fact that I hate my attorney and what do you get?

 

I was sad, anxious, angry, hurt, excited.... all in one. What stuck me most is that you can end a marriage of that duration that quickly.

 

I took my marriage very seriously and the committment kept me far longer than the feelings.......

[Merin]

I pick C...

 

It isn't until you've had time.. real time to digest what just happend that you become either very freakin happy OR really pissed off... OR sad.

 

When I was in court for my FINAL hearing.. my EXH was sitting there sucking up to the judge (that he knew well because he's a cop) I wasn't allowed to say anything in open court, because my EXH attorney got a motion to have it heard in chambers because of my EXH being a cop... (BTW I wasn't allowed in chambers either) the ****ers!

 

He sat there trying to play *nice* I ignored him... they asked me IF I was pregnant.. to which I said No.. but does it count that his (My EXH) GF is? His attorney>> ::COUGH COUGH Your honor! COUGH COUGH::

 

DD.. I'll hope for C in court for you... because you have a little person together trust me when I say she (Your STBXW) Will have many opportunities to piss you off in the future, get the last word again and again.... lets just hope that in the end of things YOU'RE the one doing somersaults

[MassiveAtom]

I say (D) only because I was married to her too! But (A) is also highly likely.

 

hmmmm, nah, I'll have to go with (D) her self-importance, and her need to see herself as "healthier" and more mature than you will win out.

 

I wish you could take a video camera with you.

 

Keep stoppin those bullets!

 

MA

[Lil Honey]

DD:

 

For me it was like Lonestar said. It's kinda like being a zombie for a while. Sometimes still, I don't feel "divorced", if that makes any sense (and it's been over two months).

 

And for me, it was just like you described. We went in, I was asked a couple questions (one being, Am I PG?). I guess I was the one asked the questions on the stand because I was the one filing. My husband sat at one of the tables. They asked him if he contested and he said no. We (along with my attorney) went to the clerk's office, signed the papers, she stamped them and that was that. Cut and dried.

 

Nobody escorted any of the divorced people out of the courtroom.

 

And Massive Atom? Can I just say - through my laughter - that your av looks like you misplaced your holely underwear? Okay . . . I'll stop laughing now . . . any time now . . . soon . . .

 

Lil Honey

[MassiveAtom]

Originally posted by Lil Honey

And Massive Atom? Can I just say - through my laughter - that your av looks like you misplaced your holely underwear? Okay . . . I'll stop laughing now . . . any time now . . . soon . . .

 

 

That's my daughter!

 

She's playing with some goo we made!

 

underwear! sheesh!

[Ladyjane14]

Your court day is tomorrow, right? I had thought it was the 15th for some reason and then this thread said Tuesday.

 

Well, at any rate....I just wanted to say that I hope it all goes well, with the minimum amount of stress. I'm sure I'm not the only one here at LS that'll be with ya in spirit.

 

Good Luck.

[b52srock]

I cannot imagine how you feel right now. My divorce is still months away and I have nightmares about it already. Not so much the being in court, but how I'm going to react when all is said and done. AND the fact that my mother wants to be there for "support". Crap. Just want to go it alone, you know? If she wants to be at the house after its all over, fine. But for heaven's sake, just let me do this by myself!

 

DD...best of luck to you.

[izzybelle]

we didn't have to appear in court. in fact i didn't even know what the final date was going to be until after all was said and done and the final papers arrived in the mail. so there was no option for any of the choices you gave.

 

on a different more bizarre note....a friend of mine met her now husband at divorce court!

 

good luck!

[Devildog]

Originally posted by Ladyjane14

Your court day is tomorrow, right? I had thought it was the 15th for some reason and then this thread said Tuesday.

 

Well, at any rate....I just wanted to say that I hope it all goes well, with the minimum amount of stress. I'm sure I'm not the only one here at LS that'll be with ya in spirit.

 

Good Luck.

 

Uh, Ladyjane, you got a calander handy? The 15th of March falls on a Tuesday this year. LOL Oh crap, I just realized something...... the Ides of March. Well, isn't that ironic?

 

Only about 12 hours to go now. I don't forsee any stress, just some disappointment all around. I don't think anyone really wanted this, it just ended up this way. My XW and I just couldn't survive the loss of our daughter. It was too much to bear.

 

Perhaps we will both be better off. Only time will tell.

[Mz. Pixie]

MA- I thought that was you with a torn T shirt on your head! I didn't know it was your daughter!!! That explains alot!

 

DD- good luck today fella- I just went through this so I feel for you.

 

XH called yesterday and said the atty didn't have all my paperwork. I asked him what was missing? He said he didn't know. He wouldn't call to find out. He said he was tired of it all and was going to take his offer back if we didn't get it processed. I said it is a little hard for me to call to say there is stuff missing and then ask THEM what's missing. They obviously thought it was all there when they sent it you jerk!

 

I wanted to mention that if he wouldn't have wanted to drag me through the mud we could have gotten this over a long time ago!

 

Again, DD good luck and let us know how it goes!

[Devildog]

Well, the results are in. And the correct answer was.......... None of the Above.

 

Tears and nerves from her. Alot of sadness. Not much said though.

 

It is over. Finished.

 

And I feel no different. Just a piece of paper I guess. I shouldn't be surprised. I didn't feel any different on my wedding day. Nothing changed really, it was just a legal formality.