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376 days and its over!


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376 days after my divorce papers came and now I know it done.

 

My worst fear came true after talking to my daughter 5 nights ago. After the EW cancelling her move to texas i thot maybe there wasnt much to her relationship with her ex boss as i thot. After all, if he meant that much sh'ed go hell or high water right? My daughter commences to tell me -dad they talk on the phone like f****** teenagers every night.

 

Yesterday the phone rings. Its a real estate broker who wants me to sign some papers as the EW has sold the house. i put it off and did not return the faxes. This morning she called again. Please please sign. I sounded uninterested (altho i knew i had to) and hung up. Five minutes later, my EW calls. "you need to sign these papers and yada yada yada...and THEN, commences to tell me in a 10 minute sentence why we'll NEVER get back together, you did this and that, it wont work, youll find someone else, i pray you do, i cannot try to make it work cause there are things ill never forget, people say i seem sooooo much happier (my daughter tells me otherwise), i dont love you anymore, etc etc etc-she went on and on and on. Even to the point of slipping, I think (and not to harbour hope) she said, "and if i ever caught you with another beer in your hand Id kick your ass'! I dunno (and again not to sound hopeful) but that line sounded almost futuristic to me. Read it over and over and see if it doesnt stick out.

Then near the end, she said (after her tirade of no's) she said "and i love ***, there i said it".

I cant say it surprised me and i dont know what part of tonight I'll beak down. As hard as Ive tried and as nice as ive tried to be thru all of this, its just the final stomp on my eggshell of a heart.

Thank god she isnt here to kick it--cause i need one now. More than 1.

And thus, I have lost the love of my life.

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Digger, honey, you lost her a long time ago. You've just got to come to terms with the loss.

 

Are you taking any meds?? Remember your child or children love you and need you to be healthy. You've got to start moving on-or you will be bitter and alone the rest of your life.

 

I know you're hurting- I really do- and I'm not trying to be ugly in any way. I just hate to see you continue suffering like you are. Is there a hobby perhaps you could devote yourself to? Reading? Exercise? It might help to take your mind off everything from time to time.

 

Hang in there--------

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