Donate Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I find that I get the most satisfaction out of life when I cheat. I also think society has placed an unfair stigmatism on married people having lovers. IMO its not very realistic to expect two people to go through life without having intimate relationships with other people. What are your thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
MissTakes Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I think that if you don't believe two people can go through life without having intimate relationships with others, you either shouldn't get married in the first place, or you should plan it into your marriage from the very beginning. And I think that it's incredibly selfish to think that you - or even you and your spouse - are the only ones impacted by your decision to cheat. A lot of the OW/OM's on here discuss - at length - how much their A's have impacted their lives. And not in a positive way. If you genuinely care about your spouse or a potential AP, I believe, you wouldn't choose to start the affair in the first place - it has too much capacity to hurt them. That's why my xMM trying to tell me how much he cared about me was what made it so easy to walk away: if he had genuinely cared, he never would have put me in that position in the first place. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
sunburned Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 Well, donate, it's why "society" doesn't require us to get married. And that same good-natured society permits us to get divorced. In either case, you can have all the sex you want with all the different people you want! Problem solved. 10 Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I find that I get the most satisfaction out of life when I cheat. I also think society has placed an unfair stigmatism on married people having lovers. IMO its not very realistic to expect two people to go through life without having intimate relationships with other people. What are your thoughts? Nothing at all wrong with your views, as long as you don't impose them on others. If you don't feel monogamy is important or relevent, don't be monogamous. Ensure that this is clearly discussed and agreed upon at the start of any relationship, and ensure that it's very clear throughout the relationship that it never will change. HOWEVER...don't impose your views on someone who doesn't agree with them. Just because YOU don't value marriage...don't use that as a 'reason' why you should participate in the destruction of someone else's marriage. Frankly...there are 7.2 billion people out there. Surely you can find many, many of them to be intimate with without ever compromising someone else's marriage? Problem solved. NEXT!!!! 8 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 Donate, I think you are a troll:rolleyes: 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I find that I get the most satisfaction out of life when I cheat. I also think society has placed an unfair stigmatism on married people having lovers. IMO its not very realistic to expect two people to go through life without having intimate relationships with other people. What are your thoughts? Are you married? Do the husbands of the women you f*ck around with know of their indiscretions? Link to post Share on other sites
FusionCutter Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 Are you married? Do the husbands of the women you f*ck around with know of their indiscretions? Maybe some people just want to watch the world burn. Haha. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Donate Posted October 23, 2014 Author Share Posted October 23, 2014 Are you married? Do the husbands of the women you f*ck around with know of their indiscretions? I don't know but I don't need to know either. My wife may have screwed around on me....hell she's human. If she needed a itch scratched or just felt like a different flavor of beef then so be it...all I ask is don't bring anything home. Don't ask, Don't tell goes a long way in a relationship. In the end, if everyone is happy then no harm done. Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 My point is similar to that of Owl; if you don't believe in marriage for whatever reasons THAN DON'T GET MARRIED. It's ridiculously simple. I'm so sick and tired of hearing and reading about men and women bellyache about marriage or even monogamy for that matter as they try and justify their wayward ways. Give me a f*cking break. No one is forcing anyone to get married or be in an exclusive relationship. If you enjoy f*cking around with multiple partners then own up to it and find partners who value THAT rather than pretend to be someone you're not. Then again there is a breed of people who seriously get off on the whole sneaking around/getting caught thing. As far as I'm concerned, those people don't have a soul...or even a heart. 9 Link to post Share on other sites
eye of the storm Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I have a friend in an open marriage. He and his wife both date. They discussed it before hand, they communicate constantly, they have rules they both agreed to, and they only date people who are either single or in open marriages. They know the other person is in an open marriage because they ask to speak to the spouse the first time to make sure. They also agree that being monogamous is not for them, but they don't want to hurt others so they don't get involved with cheaters. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NJ123 Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 My point is similar to that of Owl; if you don't believe in marriage for whatever reasons THAN DON'T GET MARRIED. It's ridiculously simple. I'm so sick and tired of hearing and reading about men and women bellyache about marriage or even monogamy for that matter as they try and justify their wayward ways. Give me a f*cking break. No one is forcing anyone to get married or be in an exclusive relationship. If you enjoy f*cking around with multiple partners then own up to it and find partners who value THAT rather than pretend to be someone you're not. Then again there is a breed of people who seriously get off on the whole sneaking around/getting caught thing. As far as I'm concerned, those people don't have a soul...or even a heart. That's why I stopped posting on a certain section of this site. Way too depressing to read about others justifying their wrongdoings or not owning up to it. Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I think you guys are missing the point! He gets satisfaction out of cheating. You can't CHEAT if you don't have someone to cheat on! Thrill seeking, lying, cheating, manipulating... Maybe this should be moved to the personality disorders section! Oh, right, we don't have one of those! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 Donate, I think you are a troll:rolleyes: Actually, after looking at the poster's history here on LS, I tend to agree. Let's let this thread die a graceful death, shall we? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruffian1 Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 "Don't ask, Don't tell goes a long way in a relationship.' Yes it does, and lets get rid of DNA tests because a H or bf with that attitude has no right to ask if that baby is from his sperm and she don't have to tell you whose else might be the biological father. Being upfront and honest goes a long way in a relationship too I hear. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I find that I get the most satisfaction out of life when I cheat. I also think society has placed an unfair stigmatism on married people having lovers. IMO its not very realistic to expect two people to go through life without having intimate relationships with other people. What are your thoughts? I think if you think it's unfair for married people not to have lovers why don't you stay single and screw around with 100's of lovers. Enjoy! Link to post Share on other sites
Furious Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I find that I get the most satisfaction out of life when I cheat. I also think society has placed an unfair stigmatism on married people having lovers. IMO its not very realistic to expect two people to go through life without having intimate relationships with other people. What are your thoughts? In order to say you enjoy cheating means that you're not in an open relationship. I have no problem with sexual diversity as long as it is done honestly. To infer you enjoy cheating is in itself enjoying dishonesty. You may think you are realistic is rather funny, if you were truly realistic you'd have no reason to be a dishonest individual. Sorry to break your bubble, but you're just the run of the mill cheater, even though you may think you're an intellectual free thinker. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Poppy47 Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 I think you are a joke. If you aren't then you have a serious problem with your personality . There is something seriously wrong with thriving on deliberate deceit. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Elle1975 Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 That's the kind of things that should be discussed before marriage, along with kids, money, and sex. Link to post Share on other sites
beach Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 I find that I get the most satisfaction out of life when I cheat. I also think society has placed an unfair stigmatism on married people having lovers. IMO its not very realistic to expect two people to go through life without having intimate relationships with other people. What are your thoughts? Ya... Evidently my exH thought the same thing - but failed to tell me the terms of our M had changed to allow him room for OW. Then I found him out - that's when I divorced him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cressida Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 "Don't ask, Don't tell goes a long way in a relationship.' Yes it does, and lets get rid of DNA tests because a H or bf with that attitude has no right to ask if that baby is from his sperm and she don't have to tell you whose else might be the biological father. Being upfront and honest goes a long way in a relationship too I hear. LOL Ruffian1 at the sperm thing :lmao: coolest thing I've read here, love the phrase:laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
Lady2163 Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 I've been a serial single OW (there was a 20+ year gap in there), but add me to the camp of people who say, why bother getting married if you don't want monogamy? Maybe you're a troll, maybe not. But if I were your OW and you led me on and we worked together? Yup, you'd probably be toast. It's a concept many American men don't seem to get, when you cheat, you are asking the Other to keep silent and not rock the boat. Better to treat the, like gold than crap. Link to post Share on other sites
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