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She left me - out of the blue


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Hi Richie are you ok ? not heard from you mate whats been going on any news your side ?

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Today would of been my mums birthday, I have received an nice enough e-mail from my WS as follows below, but should I reply ?, I haven't instigated contact with her for weeks now and don't really feel the need to do so but I am polite and like to think that I do things correctly, but if I reply then that puts the ball back in her court with regards LC or NC, or is this just becoming a silly game of emotional tennis with both of us trying to be the winner and gain the upper hand ?, anyway here is her email.

 

"Hi @@@@

 

Just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you today and of course your mum, as it would have been her @@th birthday.

.

Take care @@@@@ "

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Today would of been my mums birthday, I have received an nice enough e-mail from my WS as follows below, but should I reply ?, I haven't instigated contact with her for weeks now and don't really feel the need to do so but I am polite and like to think that I do things correctly, but if I reply then that puts the ball back in her court with regards LC or NC, or is this just becoming a silly game of emotional tennis with both of us trying to be the winner and gain the upper hand ?, anyway here is her email.

 

"Hi @@@@

 

Just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you today and of course your mum, as it would have been her @@th birthday.

.

Take care @@@@@ "

 

Interesting that she would do that. The most I would say back is "thank you", but I think it's probably just as good not to respond. I must say that I don't think this is a message from a woman who doesn't care about you.

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Hi BTR, sorry my brain is a bit wooly today, do you think that she does or doesn't care for me ?, she told me weeks ago that she doesn't know if she still loves me, I think she is very confused and I still say that she is definitely going through MLC in fact if I was a gambling man I would put money on it, if so then she could just snap out of it but then it depends on me if I want to know at that stage or not, obviously I would need to consider it as we will of been married 18 years this coming June and that's no small fry especially these days in our quick fix throw away society, I think this is one of the reasons it hurts so much because we were so well suited to each other in almost every respect, and as I have said all long I never saw anything coming with regards our separation, which will be 6 months on Friday, is that too long a time for a couple to get back together, that's 6 months apart out of 20 years, should I have hope and optimism or should I start to let it go, I never wanted us to be apart and I still say after all the time I have had to mull over it that it need not of happened and could easily of been avoided.

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Richie this is your thread mate, not heard from you for ages now are you ok any developments with your situation ?

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Not totally sure why but I can feel my mood slipping, I have been thinking about her all day and missing her all day, I have had an overwhelming urge to contact her to ask to get back together but as with my last urge I know it will be rejected, I just feel as though im drowning again and that I have no future worth considering, I miss her in everything I do, I miss our holidays together, I miss our past and I miss our future together I just cant shake it off, I know im depressed I know im grieving but im scared very scared of tomorrow the day after and almost anything in the future because I don't feel as though I have a worthwhile future just a pointless lonely slog to my grave, its very dark here the rain is falling I can hear it bouncing off the windows its cold too, love is warm but loneliness and solitude is cold icy cold, love is bright orangey gold like the June sun that we married under yet loneliness is black like death I am in black I have no sun no warmth it died 6 months ago yet cold and black is thriving in this house and inside me I am black inside my light has gone out so therefore my life is death a living death miserable, never ending and deep like hell, when will it end will it end why me why me ?


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Your pain is palpable and the cold and dark will be making life seem even more bleak. In my worst pain at night I would Just concentrate on getting through 5 minutes at a time without obsessive thoughts using any effective harmless distraction . Don't give up.

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Richie are you ok ?, not heard from you for some time now mate, im getting worried about you please if you can drop a quick line to let us know that your ok .

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Richie are you ok ?, not heard from you for some time now mate, im getting worried about you please if you can drop a quick line to let us know that your ok.


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once again

 

 

Richie are you ok ?, not heard from you for some time now mate, im getting worried about you please if you can drop a quick line to let us know that your ok.


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  • 4 weeks later...
Wow. :( Gotta wonder what was the truth here.

 

 

What is that supposed to mean ?, I cant believe this news he and I bonded on here really well I am very sad for all his family, I just hope that him and his wife managed to patch things up before he went and that she was there with him at the end, I feel very sad thinking about this as our 2 situations were similar but he has gone but I am still here, god bless you Richie I hope your happy and at peace now mate.

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Gotta wonder what was the truth here.

 

what do you mean?

 

and yeah, it's shocking. they say he died within 3 weeks basically - it was probably serious illness.

 

you never know when you'll be gone.

 

RIP Richie.

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what do you mean?

 

These people obviously didn't know that he'd been estranged from his wife since October. I can only hope that it was truly an illness. I don't mean to be morbid but my first fear was that he took his own life. Saying that he succumbed to a brief illness is what you might expect someone to say to people that were more acquaintances rather than close friends and family.

 

I read a lot of sympathy for his wife in those posts and that seems painfully ironic if ultimately she was really the reason he took his own life.

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I read a lot of sympathy for his wife in those posts and that seems painfully ironic if ultimately she was really the reason he took his own life.

 

he didn't take his own life - it was illness and it actually lasted a few weeks; according to his own daughter. people did know he was estranged from his wife but that doesn't mean that they won't send her condolences, too.

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he didn't take his own life - it was illness and it actually lasted a few weeks; according to his own daughter. people did know he was estranged from his wife but that doesn't mean that they won't send her condolences, too.

 

I think you're making assumptions in both of these claims but I hope that you're right.

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I think you're making assumptions in both of these claims but I hope that you're right.

 

no, you're the one making assumptions.

 

his daughter already said he got ill on Jan 5th and died on Jan 20th. according to HER - it was illness. so it's not an assumption.

 

also, people did know about him and his wife - i actually participate in that Forum & Chat but that doesn't mean she doesn't deserve condolences.

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