Struggling today.

[Poppy47]

Today after being strong and NC for 6 months, I have crashed. Thoughts of MM and the feelings we shared are very strong and a feeling of deep grief has washed over me.

Recently, I have been seeing a nice man but perhaps it has been too soon.

 

I have been thinking about MM and the urge to speak to him has been eating at me.

I haven't done it yet and I won't because it will put me back 6 months.

 

My affair was on/off 3 times for a period of 6 years. It was a considerable period of my life and it's difficult to forget.

 

Better to post here than to email somewhere else.

 

Poppy

[Angelita]

I can't offer much advice but know how hard it can be I only been nc for a few days and it's killing me I can only imagine what six months must be like. Stay strong you already made this far keep on going. ?

[Lurkeraspect]

Today after being strong and NC for 6 months, I have crashed. Thoughts of MM and the feelings we shared are very strong and a feeling of deep grief has washed over me.

Recently, I have been seeing a nice man but perhaps it has been too soon.

 

I have been thinking about MM and the urge to speak to him has been eating at me.

I haven't done it yet and I won't because it will put me back 6 months.

 

My affair was on/off 3 times for a period of 6 years. It was a considerable period of my life and it's difficult to forget.

 

Better to post here than to email somewhere else.

 

Poppy

 

Stay strong, Poppy. When you feel the need to contact (or allow contact) with the MM, remember all the reasons he's disrespected you, why you post here.

 

Be strong.

 

Best wishes...

[still_an_Angel]

Stay strong Poppy, you have put so much work in the last 6 months to crumble now. Don't go back to the dark side. I'm rooting for you.

 

 

((hugs))

Angel

[FusionCutter]

Today after being strong and NC for 6 months, I have crashed. Thoughts of MM and the feelings we shared are very strong and a feeling of deep grief has washed over me.

Recently, I have been seeing a nice man but perhaps it has been too soon.

 

I have been thinking about MM and the urge to speak to him has been eating at me.

I haven't done it yet and I won't because it will put me back 6 months.

 

My affair was on/off 3 times for a period of 6 years. It was a considerable period of my life and it's difficult to forget.

 

Better to post here than to email somewhere else.

 

Poppy

 

Anytime you feel sad, it's better to write there than to contact him. You should be proud about your 6 months. Just focus on the fact that if your feelings for him were real, contacting him will only hurt him and his life. 6 years is a long time. He's a part of you now.

 

It's more compassionate to stay away. Affairs have lasting effects. Sounds like you are trying to forget, perhaps try another way of looking at it? Try to focus on the good aspects of the affair, you shared something really nice with someone, you learned a lot. You met someone wonderful. Appreciate it for what it was.

 

You made it 6 months. That's incredible. If you made it this long, you can continue. If your thoughts start drifting, start writing. Know that staying away from him is the most compassionate you can do for him, as well as the best thing for him.

 

You're almost there. Don't ruin your healing. One day the wounds will become scars. Your goal is to get there. You are almost there. Don't peel off the NC Bandaid.

 

Good luck. You give good advice. You're a good person. You're being a good person by staying away. Stay strong.

[Justme19]

Today after being strong and NC for 6 months, I have crashed. Thoughts of MM and the feelings we shared are very strong and a feeling of deep grief has washed over me.

Recently, I have been seeing a nice man but perhaps it has been too soon.

 

I have been thinking about MM and the urge to speak to him has been eating at me.

I haven't done it yet and I won't because it will put me back 6 months.

 

My affair was on/off 3 times for a period of 6 years. It was a considerable period of my life and it's difficult to forget.

 

Better to post here than to email somewhere else.

 

Poppy

6 months is amazing. You should look in the mirror and tell yourself just how strong you are! I am sure you've had many times of weakness and yet still maintained NC.

 

6 years is a long time despite the 3 times you were on / off. I wonder if being with someone new makes it real somehow that you are moving away even more so and it overwhelms you. It is another BIG step away and that can cause another form of grief.

 

No matter what- remind yourself you are NC six months for all the right reasons. Wishing you comfort and peace soon and strength to power through this challenge.

[Majormisstep]

Noooo Poppy! You've come such a long way. 6 months is awesome!

 

Think of something he did that ticked you off and hold on to it for dear life. You are in such a better place now. Remember those low lows? Who wants THAT nonsense again?

 

Have a cry if you need to tonight. Tomorrow will be a better day.

[sagamore]

You're triggering. It's normal; it happens with any breakup but even more so with an affair because you have to keep it secret

. You're dating someone new, and that causes you to think of him. Or who knows, it could be the changing of the seasons that reminds you of a date you had in the fall weather. Walking with friends past a restaurant you once went to with him. The triggers can be endless! But the good news is they start to feel less intense over time.

 

Six months is awesome. You're doing great, Poppy. Hang in there.

[Lurkeraspect]

How are you tonight? I'm hoping things are better.

[jellybean89]

I hope today you are finding yourself in a better, stronger frame of mind.