zoloft body snatched my girlfriend

[BC1980]

How old is she?

[mr.blond]

Okay I'll take your challenge.

 

Click on my name and you will see under my biography how I can be contacted.

 

dont have skype man. drop an email addy in ur bio and ill shoot you a few pics. just have some tissue ready

[Strength in Healing]

dont have skype man. drop an email addy in ur bio and ill shoot you a few pics. just have some tissue ready

 

 

Alrighty there you go.

[mr.blond]

Alrighty there you go.

 

no addy there bro. just soot me an email if you really want

Edited November 6, 2014 by mr.blond
email addy posted

[loversquarrel]

I don't know man, I have a hard time believing this crap. I take2 different types of anti depressants and not once did I ever think of leaving my wife. She also takes an anti depressant, her personality hasn't changed either. I am a calmer person, but essentially the same.

[loversquarrel]

Mind you, I'm not saying I doubt what happened to you, just seems there may be some other underlying factors.

[IfiKnewThen]

just wondering...

 

she says she blacked out. she goes on zoloft.

 

i hope no one took advantage of her or slipped her something. that would be devastating to anyone. she might not even like men now.

 

i hope and pray its not that serious.

 

she does sound like she wants some space tho. and is happy to have it somehow.

[BC1980]

I don't know man, I have a hard time believing this crap. I take2 different types of anti depressants and not once did I ever think of leaving my wife. She also takes an anti depressant, her personality hasn't changed either. I am a calmer person, but essentially the same.

 

Basically the same for me. I took Paxil, but it didn't change me at the core. I still want to know how old she is and why you dated for 6 years with no marriage. Many women resent that and grow detached over time.

[mr.blond]

idk. didnt want to get married till my career was stable and I had a good amount of bacon coming in guess. I would of though.

[mr.blond]

she's 25. im 4 years older

[mr.blond]

if not the ssris then I dont know how to rationalize this.

[dreamingoftigers]

BC 1980, what does it feel like to be on ssri's? have you been able to maintain a healthy lasting romantic relationship on them? Can you still feel remorse, compation, the full range of emotion?

 

I went on Effexor (SSRI) when I was 19.

 

I went from severely depressed to feeling just very gray and blah.

 

The best way that I could describe it was:

I had all of the same feelings as I did before the Effexor, but now they were under 20 feet of cement. Basically, I wanted to die, but I just didn't have the time and energy into getting over the fear of dying and completing the job.

 

I don't feel that way anymore. I am actually pretty happy overall, especially considering my circumstances at the moment. But that was pretty accurate for the time. I really felt like the SSRIs gave me enery and popped me out of the Major Depression. But that they robbed me at the same time and I felt like a zombie day to day.

 

When I finally did stop them, it was sudden (NOT recommended) I got sick out of both ends for two days and dizzy for awhile after that.

 

A year and a half ago I was offered Wellbutrin by my GP. )Not an SSRI.

I was on it for enh...about 4 to six weeks. Can't remember off the top of my head at the moment.

 

It made me explosive. Very explosive. I am not prone to outbursts of rage of any kind or even feeling large doses of anger etc.

But it was practically uncontrollable. As well, it made me feel like "who gives a crap? Big deal!"

 

Very dangerous drug. I think that surely more than a few homicides have happened due to Wellbutrin. I found myself feeling rage for hours or days at a time. It felt so powerful at moments and absolutely debilitating at others. I blew up at two food servers, a cashier, a parking attendant. I threw a lasagna at home. I kicked a box across a room and called my husband an ahole. (Although in all fairness, that last one was far, far overdue. I know about Domestic Violence etc. but seriously he was so jerky to me that was the least that should have been said.)

 

Anyway, I discontinued the Wellbutrin because I realized that even though I felt better than being weepy, it was really really not for me. It was only going to cause a lot of problems for my family and I really didn't like my behaviour at all.

 

No, it was not just a "convenient excuse" to "act however I wanted." Or whatever. I have just never felt anything quite so overpowering. I couldn't calm down for hours sometimes. I didn't like how reactive I instantly felt over the smallest things. BUT what I did take away from the experience was empathy for people with anger problems (like my Father). Perhaps their brain chemistry is often just producing too much of what the Wellbutrin brings to the table. If that is the case, walking around, being my Father, with his poor coping skills and history of family conflict must be so insane every single day. I don't envy it at all.

 

Anti-anxiety medication have a very negative effect on long-term brain health as well. My mother takes them. (Probably because she has to deal with my father, ha!) I have noticed a sharp decline over the last few years as the anti-anxiety meds increased. But she has also had chronic stress for about 20 years. My family situation is ridiculous on a good day. My brother is bed-ridden and lives in their living room. My sister is autistic and my father is an alcoholic abuser with a rage problem. So, um, yeah, it's tough to say whether it is just the anti-anxiety meds.

[mr.blond]

she's always been sensitive to any kind of medication. She seems manic while in the Zoloft. I cant believe she slept with someone else. I cant keep my mind from returning to that. She says that for the first time she has hope for the future and she wants to be alone. I dont know how to take that. Feels like maybe shes already with someone else but she swears she's not. Cant begin to describe the rage that boils up in me when I think about all this.

Edited November 7, 2014 by mr.blond
typo

[mr.blond]

just wondering...

 

she says she blacked out. she goes on zoloft.

 

i hope no one took advantage of her or slipped her something. that would be devastating to anyone. she might not even like men now.

 

i hope and pray its not that serious.

 

she does sound like she wants some space tho. and is happy to have it somehow.

 

She doesnt want space...She doesnt want anything to do with the relationship-very final.

[BC1980]

if not the ssris then I dont know how to rationalize this.

 

It usually doesn't seem rational to the one left behind because you are viewing it through different lenses. I honestly think you need to move on from this and stop talking to her. If she wants to stay on the Zoloft and says she has hope for the future, you can't do anything about that. The vast majority of people are very perplexed when their relationships end. Most people are really shocked if you read through enough of these threads. You need to take the focus off the Zoloft and onto yourself.

[BC1980]

she's 25. im 4 years older

 

Did she ever express interest in marriage? 6 years is a really long time for a woman not to want marriage. Like I said before, perhaps she grew weary. Maybe she realized she didn't want to be in it for the long haul. She said she hadn't been happy for a year.

 

We can sit around all day and talk about her, but how is that helping you move on? I think you need to go to counseling because you have described yourself as pretty despondent. This is not something that is easy to go through alone.

[mr.blond]

It usually doesn't seem rational to the one left behind because you are viewing it through different lenses. I honestly think you need to move on from this and stop talking to her. If she wants to stay on the Zoloft and says she has hope for the future, you can't do anything about that. The vast majority of people are very perplexed when their relationships end. Most people are really shocked if you read through enough of these threads. You need to take the focus off the Zoloft and onto yourself.

 

Ya. your probably right. I just cant help but think she'll come back if she drops the meds. its kind of poisonous to think that way. Its been a few days of NC. Its so god dam hard not to call her.

[BC1980]

Ya. your probably right. I just cant help but think she'll come back if she drops the meds. its kind of poisonous to think that way. Its been a few days of NC. Its so god dam hard not to call her.

 

It's really devastating for a LTR to end. It truly changes your whole life. You'll never know if it was the Zoloft or not, but I doubt it was. You don't just change who you are at your core from an anti depressant. I think that's very unlikely. Chances are she was thinking of leaving for a long time. I know firsthand how adept people can be a presenting a picture to you that isn't entirely true.

[mr.blond]

It's really devastating for a LTR to end. It truly changes your whole life. You'll never know if it was the Zoloft or not, but I doubt it was. You don't just change who you are at your core from an anti depressant. I think that's very unlikely. Chances are she was thinking of leaving for a long time. I know firsthand how adept people can be a presenting a picture to you that isn't entirely true.

 

ya... the week before shes talking about all these future plans. then the meds hit and she wants to be single, sleep around and as she put it "live my life". its alomst too much for me to handle. I just want to drown in a bottle of scotch.

[mr.blond]

its like her whole was of thinking changed. Its been over a month and this doent feel like real life

[BC1980]

ya... the week before shes talking about all these future plans. then the meds hit and she wants to be single, sleep around and as she put it "live my life". its alomst too much for me to handle. I just want to drown in a bottle of scotch.

 

Hey, look, if it makes you feel any better, my ex was talking about getting married the weekend before, and I thought I was coming home to a proposal that night. Seriously. That actually happened. I thought it was only in the movies that such an awful, unlucky thing would happen. I know all about someone projecting one thing and doing another. To be fair, there were some signs, but he was quite good at doing just enough to keep me on the hook.

 

It didn't feel like reality for months for me, and it still doesn't sometimes. A year and half later, I sometimes think, did that happen? People say that happens when someone dies too. Your reality was altered so dramatically so quickly and without warning, it's like a trauma. Your mind can take a very long time to catch up.

[mr.blond]

why have i read a out so many other situations that are alomst identical to mine? All involving zoloft if some other ssri?

[mr.blond]

OMG. there are hundreds of posts on this site alone. Every one is the same- spouce started ssri or ssnri and relationship crumbled immediately. Never let your other take zolof of any other ssri unless your prepaired to lose them.

[wiley]

I can relate, mr.blond. It does get better, I promise.

 

Three months ago my BF of 2.5 years and I broke up, and it is very difficult to not blame the Celexa (SSRI) he started taking six months before the break. We had a wonderful, drama-free relationship for two years. Then he started having a lot of stress (executive by day, launching a start-up nights and weekends), which led to a couple panic attacks. His GP put him on the drugs after a 10 minute consultation.

 

The first thing I noticed was less sex/affection. This was soon followed by apathy, indifference….he just became ice cold. We had a couple of meaningful talks along the way; he said he wanted me in his life and wanted to work on “us.” But I became increasingly impatient when the words were not followed by actions. It was impossible not to feel like a chump…just strung along and an afterthought in his life. During the breakup talk he said he didn’t think he was capable of feeling love. Sigh. Bull****, I’d experienced his love for two years before this episode.

 

Maybe the demise of our relationship was due to his priorities, maybe it was the SSRIs. I’ll never know for sure, but the thing is, it does’t matter now. It’s over and I must heal my heart.

 

Be patient with yourself. You can’t fast forward through the pain. It hurts like a mofo, but it will abate. Give it time. Go no contact. The usual advice: exercise, eat well, hug your friends, read books. Pain brings an excellent opportunity for introspection and personal growth. For me, biking helped accelerate the healing. At three months post breakup I mostly have good days (today is not one of them), but there is a dull ache I kind of carry around with me. And that feeling of being broken (which leads to little bouts of panic) comes and goes. I have to trust that I will not let this experience damage future relationships.

 

A couple quotes that helped me in the early days (sorry I don’t have the authors for the first two, wish I did):

 

"The limbic system in our brain holds an internal image of life, as we know it. When a major change takes place, new neuropathways must be built in order to accommodate an updated version of reality. Building a new picture literally takes a lot of energy and time depending on the nature of the change. If we didn’t understand that grieving is a necessary process in order to move forward, we might become impatient and want to skip this unpleasant period of time.”

 

"Gratitude helps to calm deep limbic or emotional areas of the brain and enhances the judgment centers.”

 

And good old Bukowski: Quote by Charles Bukowski: ?The Laughing Heart your life is your life don?...?

 

Stay positive and let the gods delight in you.

[mr.blond]

I can relate, mr.blond. It does get better, I promise.

 

Three months ago my BF of 2.5 years and I broke up, and it is very difficult to not blame the Celexa (SSRI) he started taking six months before the break. We had a wonderful, drama-free relationship for two years. Then he started having a lot of stress (executive by day, launching a start-up nights and weekends), which led to a couple panic attacks. His GP put him on the drugs after a 10 minute consultation.

 

The first thing I noticed was less sex/affection. This was soon followed by apathy, indifference….he just became ice cold. We had a couple of meaningful talks along the way; he said he wanted me in his life and wanted to work on “us.” But I became increasingly impatient when the words were not followed by actions. It was impossible not to feel like a chump…just strung along and an afterthought in his life. During the breakup talk he said he didn’t think he was capable of feeling love. Sigh. Bull****, I’d experienced his love for two years before this episode.

 

Maybe the demise of our relationship was due to his priorities, maybe it was the SSRIs. I’ll never know for sure, but the thing is, it does’t matter now. It’s over and I must heal my heart.

 

Be patient with yourself. You can’t fast forward through the pain. It hurts like a mofo, but it will abate. Give it time. Go no contact. The usual advice: exercise, eat well, hug your friends, read books. Pain brings an excellent opportunity for introspection and personal growth. For me, biking helped accelerate the healing. At three months post breakup I mostly have good days (today is not one of them), but there is a dull ache I kind of carry around with me. And that feeling of being broken (which leads to little bouts of panic) comes and goes. I have to trust that I will not let this experience damage future relationships.

 

A couple quotes that helped me in the early days (sorry I don’t have the authors for the first two, wish I did):

 

"The limbic system in our brain holds an internal image of life, as we know it. When a major change takes place, new neuropathways must be built in order to accommodate an updated version of reality. Building a new picture literally takes a lot of energy and time depending on the nature of the change. If we didn’t understand that grieving is a necessary process in order to move forward, we might become impatient and want to skip this unpleasant period of time.”

 

"Gratitude helps to calm deep limbic or emotional areas of the brain and enhances the judgment centers.”

 

And good old Bukowski: Quote by Charles Bukowski: ?The Laughing Heart your life is your life don?...?

 

Stay positive and let the gods delight in you.

 

 

ya, its the ssri's doin this to everyone. She turned into a compleat stranger i. a month. Im so $&@!ing angry about this. Feels like its being swept under the rug. Id like to be on zolft to numb out for while.