Racial Discrimination or Personal Preference?

[tanbark813]

Originally posted by Topaze

Sorry, I started this thread and if you will note the title it is Racial Discrimination or Personal Preference and I posted the opening post making it clear what the focus was to be.

 

If you wish to start a thread about personal preferences in dating...feel free. As I have already stated, it is a worthwhile topic but NOT the focus of this particular thread. I really would like to see this issue explored as it came up in another thread a few times and was not related to THAT thread. Let's stop taking things off track or it will never be possible to discuss any issue in depth.

 

You asked if it was racial discrimination or personal preference. We gave our opinions on what we believe it to be. I don't see how it got off track.

 

Originally posted by Topaze

Also, let's focus on issues not psychoanalyzing people.....I doubt that you are a qualified therapist.

 

I wasn't trying to psychoanalyze you, just giving you some pointers on getting some ass. If you want people to want to bone you, you'll find it's best to not go around offending them.

[KissMyTiara]

Originally posted by Topaze

Sorry, I started this thread and if you will note the title it is Racial Discrimination or Personal Preference and I posted the opening post making it clear what the focus was to be.

 

 

HELLO!?! Do you not see what you wrote yourself?!?! "Racial Discrimination or Personal Perference" was what YOU titled this forum, thus asking all of us whether or not stating whether or not one is attracted to black women amounts to racial discrimination or personal preference. I think that we have made it evidently clear to you, Topaze, that not including black women in one's online dating website PREFERENCES amounts to just that: a freaking PREFERENCE.

[HokeyReligions]

Originally posted by Topaze

Sorry, I am the one that started this thread, remember. If you will note the title it is Racial Discrimination or Personal Preference and I posted the opening post making it clear what the focus was to be.

 

If you wish to start a thread about personal preferences in dating...feel free. As I have already stated, it is a worthwhile topic but NOT the focus of this particular thread. I really would like to see this issue explored as it came up in another thread a few times and was not related to THAT thread. Let's stop taking things off track or it will never be possible to discuss any issue in depth.

 

 

You are contradicting yourself. Your title said Racial Discrimination **OR** Personal Preference. Then you go on to say that Personal Preference is NOT what the thread is about. I think you are confusing the two.

 

You want an in depth discussion and that is what you got---in both threads.

[HokeyReligions]

Originally posted by Topaze

Please read ALL the definitions....the key here is that people are being treated differently because of their RACE..... However, I will challenge you on the superiority thing too. Clearly there is an evaluation going on here when people are saying that Black women, Asian men etc. aren't attractive....they are IN essences showing a preference based on RACE that makes it clear that they find White people more attractive....better....superior...

 

It is fascinating to watch people try to justify their own prejudices...absolutely fascinating. I am just going to listen for a while and see what other excuses people will use.

 

Yes it is fascinating. I love how you can speak for everyone and assume that because someone PREFERS certain characterists of a race and not find other racial characteristics attractive you ASSUME that they also automatically think that others are better or superior. That is NOT always the case. Your approach leads me to think that YOU have the superiority complex and that you are one of the many who who prejudges the character of a person based on their race. Perhaps not, but that is how you are coming across.

 

If people don't agree with you, you think they are making excuses?! For what? What they find attractive? Personal preference needs no excuse.

 

Clearly there is an evaluation going on here...

Clearly, there isn't.

[monkey00]

IT IS personal preference. everyone is different and has his/her own tastes in body types (fat,tall/short, skinny, pale/dark skinned short/long hair)...etc. How hard is that to accept??

 

e.g. my best colleagues from my college are black, my co-workers are black , and my sexual preference might be latin/white.... I talk and treat the black man/woman as if i

would as good as any of my family or friends...does that make me racist? NO

 

some might classify sexual preference as a fetish, which it could probably well be. BUT it is far from racist.

 

honestly all i can say is this is a pointless debate.

 

JUST accept what it is and get over it. If your opinion of this is that it racist, then so be it, just get over it and move on.

[Mr Spock]

It's easy to tell someone they're "getting off track" when they disagree with you, and do it well. I don't think any post yet is derailing the thread.

 

Fighting on the internet is like running in the special olympics. You can win, but you're still retarded.

[KissMyTiara]

Originally posted by Topaze

I have achieved my objective.

 

You never answered me - just what is your objective?

[Topaze]

I opened this thread to explore the issue of racial discrimination and how appropriate it is to consider race when dating. I would like to explore this issue in depth. I don't think this is too much to ask especially since people kept bringing it up when I was trying to discuss another issue. Please respect that.

 

Since some people want to discuss personal preferences in general and their role in dating, I have opened another thread.....it's all yours:

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?threadid=58774

 

Enjoy. Now let's get back on track. Thank you.

[alphamale]

being of asian-indian origins myself I treat african americans with respect and dignity cause I know what they have gone thru as a race in the U.S.

 

However, I am not interested in dating african american women because I am not physically attracted to most of them.

 

you can call it racial discrimination or personal preferernce but it is in reality a combo of both.

[Topaze]

Originally posted by KissMyTiara

You never answered me - just what is your objective?

 

Sorry I didn't see your question.

 

To get people to discuss and really think through and examine their prejudices.

[Mr Spock]

Quit telling people to get back on track when they're not off it in the first place. Articulate a bit better in your rebuttal.

[KissMyTiara]

Originally posted by Topaze

I opened this thread to explore the issue of racial discrimination and how appropriate it is to consider race when dating. I would like to explore this issue in depth. I don't think this is too much to ask especially since people kept bringing it up when I was trying to discuss another issue. Please respect that.

 

Since some people want to discuss personal preferences in general and their role in dating, I have opened another thread.....it's all yours:

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?threadid=58774

 

Enjoy. Now let's get back on track. Thank you.

 

 

We have answered you, SHEESH!!

 

We ALLLLLLLL (with the exception of only you!) think that is perfectly fine to consider the physical characteristics of a person in deciding who to date and not date, and sometimes those characteristics are those that belong namely to one race or another.

 

END the thread, please!

[Mr Spock]

To get people to discuss and really think through and examine their prejudices

 

 

Because you think something, doesn't make it so. If someone states their opinion is based on sexual preference does NOT mean they're harbouring secret racial hatred, or even ingrained discrimination just because you think it does.

[KissMyTiara]

Originally posted by Topaze

 

 

To get people to discuss and really think through and examine their prejudices.

 

 

I agree with Spock. Just because you think we (and others) are racist or prejudiced does NOT mean it's true. No way, Jose.

 

Let me ask you this - why is it that you have NO preferences, Topaze? Are you that desperate that you need to include the entire pool of eligible bachelors amongst your choices of available men?? My guess is no. I bet you DO have preferences, and that's perfectly fine - we're not going to label you "racist" or tell you that you are prejudiced towards one group or another.

[CurvyGurl]

Personally....

 

I think you aren't dating because you analyze things to the nth degree and have to address each and every point and lawyer it to death. We're telling you what you don't want to hear and so we must be getting off tangent, or perhaps we dont understand the true point you're trying to get across.

 

If anyone gets it, I do... but I also get that men sense this stuff from far, far away and run run completely in the other direction. They just arent attracted to you. Period. Maybe it's your ethnicity, maybe it's your personality, maybe it's your hair, your style, your black gurl booty. WHO CARES??? WHYY woud you want to date someone who doesn't find you attractive?

 

MOVE. ON.

[Pocky]

Originally posted by Topaze

To get people to discuss and really think through and examine their prejudices.

 

I'm perfectly comfortable with my prejudices. It appears that you're comfortable with yours as well.

[KissMyTiara]

Originally posted by CurvyGurl

I think you aren't dating because you analyze things to the nth degree and have to address each and every point and lawyer it to death. We're telling you what you don't want to hear and so we must be getting off tangent, or perhaps we dont understand the true point you're trying to get across.

 

If anyone gets it, I do... but I also get that men sense this stuff from far, far away and run run completely in the other direction. They just arent attracted to you. Period. Maybe it's your ethnicity, maybe it's your personality, maybe it's your hair, your style, your black gurl booty. WHO CARES??? WHYY woud you want to date someone who doesn't find you attractive?

 

MOVE. ON.

 

 

[Applause!!!!]

[Topaze]

- why is it that you have NO preferences, Topaze?

 

I never said that I don't have preferences. I just don't discrminate against people based on race. End of story. There are many far more important factors to consider that have much more of a bearing on the likelihood that a relationship will succeed. These we can perhaps discuss at some other time in some other thread.

 

As for the rest of your comment, that was a personal put down and I will not dignifiy it with an answer.

[Topaze]

I am dating but I am not dating anyone exclusively at present. Again let's keep the pesonal put downs and assumptions out of it. Whether or not I am dating really has no relevance to this discussion.

 

Why do people have so much difficulty focusing on the issue at hand and not going off on tangents or resorting to personal put downs here?

[Topaze]

Originally posted by Pocky

I'm perfectly comfortable with my prejudices.

 

 

That's sad.

 

 

It appears that you're comfortable with yours as well.

 

As stated before, I don't believe that racial discrimination is appropriate.

[GirlDown]

Originally posted by Topaze

That wouldn't be RACIAL discrimination. The operative term is RACIAL.

o

 

so discrimination is okay as long as it's not your race? what a two-faced bucket of shyt. ( not you, the idea.)

 

 

let's not forget that the word "racial" doesn't in itself mean something bad, you just take it that way. it's a description for a certain type of circumstantial situation. you hear "racial" and automatically think "discrimination."

 

if it is a racial issue, it's only because characteristics of certain races are unattractive to certain people. that's all that makes the situation racial. so what? it's not rude, it's fine and acceptable for people to like what they like, and not like what they don't. some people don't say it nicely. maybe you're discriminating againts someone's personality because they don't sugarcoat something that hurts your feelings.

 

 

so basically, it only becomes an issue because it's deemed "racial" ? please.

 

i'm so tired of the banality of this dichotomy.

[johan]

Topaze,

 

If you want to ask an honest question that everyone else deems stupid, go for it. If you want to analyze everything to the n-th degree, you have my support. If you are wrong or made to feel stupid, more power to you. It takes a lot of guts to bring something real to the table that challenges such a tight little internet clique. And then to stand your ground. I think you're cool.

 

I figure you'll achieve happiness before you ever figure out why white guys don't dig black women, or whether that's racist. Then you'll forget about it. But in the meantime, don't let it get in your way.

 

Johan

[Topaze]

Girldown, I wanted to explore attitudes towards race in depth and that is why I opened this thread. Since some people want to discuss personal preferences in general, I opened another thread. I have never said that discrimination is okay....in fact read my opening comments in the other thread and you will get a clue as to where I weigh in on the issue that you are raising:

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=431036#post431036

[Pocky]

That's sad.

 

Not really. I get to be prejudice regarding anything that attempts to get between my legs. Whether it's because they're of a different religion, race, sex, age or because I dislike the color of their hair, eyes, or if it's simply because they have ugly feet. It's my body - my right to decide what I do with it. I have a right to be prejudice with my own body because it's mine and I am the one that's responsible for its care. You and no one else has any place telling me how I will care for my body.

 

As stated before, I don't believe that racial discrimination is appropriate.

 

Maybe you didn't notice, but you're prejudice against people that discriminate racially. Or is it a personal preference..

 

Thought one of my old quotes would be appropriate. Unfortunately, so many people see recognition of race as a negative thing. One can recognize race and it's not discriminatory.

 

In order to get beyond racism, we must first take account of race. There is no other way. And in order to treat some persons equally, we must treat them differently. - Henry Blackmun

[Craig]

Topaze, I have been following this thread and trying to figure out what is going on and maybe I can add shades of grey to the discussion . . .

 

R % of people will date any race.

S % of people won't date anyone but their own race.

T % of people won't date anyone but their own race provided they have the right hair color, eye color, etc.

U % of people won't date anyone but a specific race (i.e. not their own.)

V % of people won't date a specific race because they are racists.

W % of people won't date a specific race because they are not attracted to the physical features of that race.

X % of people won't date a specific race because they are worried that if they have kids that the world will be hard on the kids of a mixed race.

Y % of people would like to date a specific race but don't because of religious beliefs.

Z % of people would like to date a specific race but don't because they are worried what their friends and family would say.

 

Etc.

 

So is it Discrimination? Yes. Is it Personal Preference? Yes. Is it Racial Discrimination? Sometimes.

 

Sometimes it's Personal Preference, sometimes it's Discriminating Personal Preference and sometimes the Discriminating Personal Preference of a Racist.

 

If I choose not to date a specific race because I don't prefer certain attributes of that race (they don't fit my "image ideal") AND I have several close friends that are of that race, is that racial discrimination? Am I a racist? Or am I expressing Personal Preferences?

 

I think I would be making a decision to categorize based upon attributes, that I don't want in a mate, found in all individual members of that race and therefore choose not to date that race.