Guys Only: A lot of American men going overseas to find dates

[contact1]

Several years ago, I was actually approached by someone, offering me 20k cash to marry someone overseas, for citizenship. I was single and broke back then too, but I declined the offer. Wow haven't thought about that for so long, haha it's funny thinking about it now.

 

I don't think I would ever go seeking a date overseas intentionally, but I also don't think the dating scene is as horrible or as shallow as some make it to be. At some point, people have forgotten that dating is suppose is to be fun, but now it seems so over-analyzed.

 

I will say though, I wouldn't mind dating a French or British woman, I find their accents very alluring

[gaius]

That girl married some guy named William, and is due to drop baby number two in a few weeks.

 

Sorry you missed her.

She's gotta be getting sick of that combover by now.

[carhill]

If EU member countries, marriages appear to run across country boundaries but the authorities suggest reviewing relevant laws in one's own country, that of one's prospective spouse, and the laws of the country where one marries, if different. They also suggest registration of the marriage with one's country's consular office. This appears quite different than our K1 and K3 processes and perhaps more similar to a situation like mine an my exW, she being a 'citizen' of Illinois (born there ) and me Cali and we got married in Hawaii. Our marriage record doesn't exist locally because we never registered it but our divorce does because we sued in our court of residence. Our marriage license appears in Honolulu civil records.

[gaius]

I think that only applies if someone is specifically treating it like a shopping trip, or sex holiday. You guys make it sound like you're checking out a product line, and bringing home something without a personality of its own, rather than a woman/girlfriend.

 

My Dad met my mother when he was stationed overseas. He was congratulated by a few dolts for getting himself an English wife, who wouldn't expect certain things that would make her life as a housewife easier (if she chose to stay at home). Luckily, my dad wasn't like those men. He expects better than that for me, too.

Oh, you're lumping us all into the same category now?

 

Your dad sounds like one of the good ones Anela.

[alphamale]

I will say though, I wouldn't mind dating a French or British woman, I find their accents very alluring

indeed ....

[carhill]

Well, I'll admit that, when an Aussie woman says 'mate', my mind trends to that idea

 

Even though I know she doesn't mean it that way....

[alphamale]

Well, I'll admit that, when an Aussie woman says 'mate', my mind trends to that idea

 

Even though I know she doesn't mean it that way....

:lmao:

[loveweary11]

Well, I'll admit that, when an Aussie woman says 'mate', my mind trends to that idea

 

Even though I know she doesn't mean it that way....

 

 

And that works both ways.

 

Had a female friend who made a huge faux pas in Australia.

 

She is with a mostly male crowd at a bar in Perth, I think it was. They are all having a lively bar conversation and they ask her which American football team she liikes. She says, "the New England Patriots. That's the team I root for." :lmao:

 

The bar EXPLODES in laughter!

 

"Do you root for the whole team?" they ask her...

 

"Of course!" sheb says.

 

If anyone knows what root means in Australia (it's exactly what you are thinking), she was saying she slept with the entire team. They laughed for a good 20 mins,

[A O]

The reality of the dating scene is what you make of it and you do yourself no favours with this rather bleak view of your dating scene. Nonetheless, many, many men are happy for you to hold this view and many more guys like you also because it makes dating life easier for them.

[Sarabi]

Clearly to us lot in the know, there is a North - South divide

 

And for those of us from the home of Led Zeppelin, Cadburys and Ozzy Osbourne, there is a Midlands to cause a further divide

[Pyro]

With the hundreds of millions of people here the probability of finding someone is good. For some people though that may not happen unless you move.

 

My spouse is from overseas (for those not aware ) but I didn't go out of my way to find her because I was fed up with American women. It just happened by chance (Internet) and we connect well.

[Haydn]

And for those of us from the home of Led Zeppelin, Cadburys and Ozzy Osbourne, there is a Midlands to cause a further divide

 

Knew a nice girl from Solihull once. But she was 'Villa' it was not to be.

[SycamoreCircle]

Forgive me if someone referenced him already, but Roosh V is a blogger who focuses specifically on the sort of issues this thread encapsulates.

 

I find his views thought-provoking, provocative and worth consideration.

 

My own experiences lead me to agree that sexual dynamics in the U.S. are totally out of whack. Men are emasculated. Women are indecipherable. Invisible, ever-changing rules dominate everything. Everyone is dissatisfied.

 

My experiences abroad lead me to believe that foreign women make better, happier partners.

 

Roosh V

[regine_phalange]

Invisible, ever-changing rules dominate everything. Everyone is dissatisfied.

 

That;s what I've observed as well. Now, I've met some American people (men and women) and I liked all of them. Especially two of them were extremely good quality people. I really enjoyed their company. But you do seem to be stuck in regards to dating. I think your dating culture is very conservative. But human interactions are much more complex than that.

[Eggplant]

they have a poor fashion sense

What kind of outfit passes and what doesn't? What's the bar here? I personally think some fashions that a lot of American girls wear are terrible, for example leggings as pants. But otherwise please help.

[Anela]

Forgive me if someone referenced him already, but Roosh V is a blogger who focuses specifically on the sort of issues this thread encapsulates.

 

 

Roosh V

 

I wouldn't listen to anything this guy says. Sorry.

[edgygirl]

I live in the US but am technically from a developing country. Honestly, after 10 years here, I wouldn't recommend American men to any woman abroad. This country is dysfunctional, men don't know how to treat women (perhaps it goes the other way around too, but I only know the female side of it) - I just don't feel feminine when going out with men here. Everything is so robotic and people don't know how to be friends and flirt at the same time. It's shrouded in a weirdness that I still can't grasp.

 

So no... sorry, American men are not God's prize to women.

 

If OP thinks he's having trouble with women here and the foreign women will be obedient and sexy and whatnot... you are indeed up for a wake up call at some point. Each country has its own cultural problems, and whatever country you find your woman at, will have new issues you're just not aware about.

 

As per women with short hair comment... get a grip!

 

America in general is not thought highly of these days. This country needs to take a long hard look at itself before we self destruct.

Edited March 22, 2015 by edgygirl

[Woggle]

The dating scene and relations between the genders in America are so toxic these days. It is a wonder anybody has healthy relationships in this climate.

[ltjg45]

The dating scene and relations between the genders in America are so toxic these days. It is a wonder anybody has healthy relationships in this climate.

 

Neither do I.

 

Finding friends, let alone starting and building a relationship, is almost pointless these days. The 3 "friends" I got (they call me their friend and I don't think the same of them) all have a portion of their personality that I can't stand at all and, as a result, I keep as much distance from them as possible.

 

And yet these 3, I get along better than almost anyone else I meet.

 

I don't think anyone has seen me recently walking with anyone else for quite some time now. Unless I find one person that I actually want to speak to, I doubt I will change that anytime soon.

[thefooloftheyear]

There are so many good and solid people in this country, its puzzling to me that even a blind squirrel couldn't find a nut without resorting to trying to pluck some woman from an undeveloped country that might decide that its better to be with you than eat cockroaches off the street or be enslaved to the prostitution trade..

 

Ive known two guys that did this...One got one from Colombia, the other from S.Korea..Both dropped their sorry asses after some time, one returning to their home land and the other going for someone else..Oh well....I guess it wasn't the overbearing and too demanding American women then...

 

Not all American men are weenies and not all American women are spoiled Princesses...

 

"Its a poor craftsman that blames the tools"....

 

TFY

Edited March 23, 2015 by thefooloftheyear

[Diezel]

OH. MY. GOD.

 

Short hair is a deal breaker when dating?

 

Yes, unless you are Halle Berry.

Don't see why this is such an outrage or a shock. It's just another dating parameter. Same as when women say they won't date guys with moustaches or beards. And I hear THAT all the time.

[lana-banana]

People have been bemoaning the decline of America since the Constitution was ratified in much the same language and we're still here. But this is a particularly unfortunate situation. In this case it seems people are blaming America itself for their inability to find a mate (as if they're somehow entitled to a romantic companion). Personally, I think if you can't find someone in your own country, in an area where you have shared cultural, societal and romantic norms, you aren't going to have a lot of luck overseas unless you're seeking out an environment where women have less freedom to choose. If your only potential companions are second-class citizens with literally no other options you should probably quit altogether.

 

There will always be those who, unable to accept responsibility for their own lack of success, decide to blame society at large. It's sad.

 

Don't see why this is such an outrage or a shock. It's just another dating parameter. Same as when women say they won't date guys with moustaches or beards. And I hear THAT all the time.

 

I'm not saying you're lying but in my environment (one of the USA's largest cities, among my fellow professional 20-30-somethings with high-paying white-collar jobs) this is unheard of. I have only two male friends without facial hair. It might not be a deal breaker if my boyfriend decided to go clean shaven but I'd definitely require an adjustment period.

[elaine567]

There will always be those who, unable to accept responsibility for their own lack of success, decide to blame society at large. It's sad. YES

 

 

I'm not saying you're lying but in my environment (one of the USA's largest cities, among my fellow professional 20-30-somethings with high-paying white-collar jobs) this is unheard of. I have only two male friends without facial hair. It might not be a deal breaker if my boyfriend decided to go clean shaven but I'd definitely require an adjustment period.

 

Exactly. Facial hair for men is fashionable and on trend.

[loveweary11]

This is exactly right.

 

One of our main isues in the US is lack of gender identities. All that warm fuzzy bs about any woman can be a man too and any man can also be a woman has ruined us. Also, there is no longer a family unit. Most people now come from single and divorced parents. No clues on how to be of their gender and how to treat the other gender.

 

I live in the US but am technically from a developing country. Honestly, after 10 years here, I wouldn't recommend American men to any woman abroad. This country is dysfunctional, men don't know how to treat women (perhaps it goes the other way around too, but I only know the female side of it) - I just don't feel feminine when going out with men here. Everything is so robotic and people don't know how to be friends and flirt at the same time. It's shrouded in a weirdness that I still can't grasp.

 

So no... sorry, American men are not God's prize to women.

 

If OP thinks he's having trouble with women here and the foreign women will be obedient and sexy and whatnot... you are indeed up for a wake up call at some point. Each country has its own cultural problems, and whatever country you find your woman at, will have new issues you're just not aware about.

 

As per women with short hair comment... get a grip!

[Radu]

Is it common enough for there to be a scene? Inside of Europe do two different national's have to go through the same governmental approval process the someone getting involved with an American will have to do at some point if you're wish to move beyond dating?

 

Before the Berlin Wall fell ... yes.

 

My country was rather famous [and eastern europe especially] for 'creating' wives.

They'd receive special training in how to please men and get men to like them ... get married to foreign business men and then send information back home.

 

If EU member countries, marriages appear to run across country boundaries but the authorities suggest reviewing relevant laws in one's own country, that of one's prospective spouse, and the laws of the country where one marries, if different. They also suggest registration of the marriage with one's country's consular office. This appears quite different than our K1 and K3 processes and perhaps more similar to a situation like mine an my exW, she being a 'citizen' of Illinois (born there ) and me Cali and we got married in Hawaii. Our marriage record doesn't exist locally because we never registered it but our divorce does because we sued in our court of residence. Our marriage license appears in Honolulu civil records.

 

There are also countries where you do not want to get married period.

One example is Italy; most women expect the guy to work and will lose respect in a major way if you can't bring home the bacon ... and a Divorce can take up to 5yrs ... if not more.

Edited March 23, 2015 by Radu