Why guys don't commit to women

[Gloria25]

OK, so what sets FWB apart from being real bf-gf/a relationship? How does one know whether one is not in a FWB, if it's such a murky combo of doing stuff together that is not restricted to sex? And what if a guy in a FWB feels the pressure from the woman and says "I love you", without actually meaning it? (as my ex did)

 

 

"More" like what? Moving in together ? The idea that some day you two would get engaged and then married? So I guess that's ultimately the criterion for whether or not it's a relationship vs FWB? I guess that means I'm in a FWB with the single dad I've been seeing , since he mentioned he doesn't want a woman to move in with him since that kill the romance, etc.

 

I guess the key is communication...especially when "terms" like FWB, ILY, etc mean so many different things to different people.

[whatcanitellyou]

I'm on my second marriage and have never had trouble getting men to commit precisely because I don't give a hoot if they do or not. I wanted a commitment so anyone that wasn't willing was not worth my time. I love my hb but he didn't do me a big fat favor, at least no more then I did him a big fat favor. We've been together almost 10 years and are still very happy.

[Tayken]

Ok, but remember, he was bringing me flowers and fixing stuff around my house?

 

So, who's confusing who here?

 

Maybe the key is to outline expectations...

 

In the same sentence...a euphemism?

[MrNate 2.0]

Only some guys don't want to commit.

 

They are usually the guys women want most....

 

You got that right.

[Darren2013]

The guy in the video is right for the most part. However, it really only applies to guys that have options to begin with.

 

 

 

I agree with this 100%. I had a pretty terrible divorce myself. After the separation, I spent about 2 years just having sex with whomever, because I saw no point in getting myself involved to the point where a woman can just come in and wreck my life on a whim. That crap is very real. I was lucky that my ex wife couldn't get my house, but she did take pretty much all of the furniture, and stole thousands of dollars from me to boot. I had to spend about a year working my behind off to recover from the hit. All because she decided she wanted to be with some other guy. Every girl I dated after that, when we split up, no harm, no foul. I didn't lose any money, I didn't lose my furniture, and I didn't lose any sleep. The only reason I have a girlfriend now is because this girl is just flipping awesome. Problem is, there are so few good women out there that any guy with options can just stay single. Sex is easy to come by, good women are not.

 

 

Well nowadays it shouldn't be hard for a guy to get a FWB since there are FWB sites and social media and stuff. Opportunities are there if you look for awhile. There's sites for asexuals, sites for gays to hook up, etc.

[Emilia]

OK, so what sets FWB apart from being real bf-gf/a relationship? How does one know whether one is not in a FWB, if it's such a murky combo of doing stuff together that is not restricted to sex? And what if a guy in a FWB feels the pressure from the woman and says "I love you", without actually meaning it? (as my ex did)

Honesty. I think more people are honest nowdays that they just want sex and maybe some companionship. 15-20 years ago when FWB wasn't so prevalent, people pretended they were in it for a 'relationship' (whatever that means really) even if they only wanted someone's company for a short while.

 

I think people nowdays are more honest. I'm not even sure a lot of 'gf/bf relationships' are all that, even if they last for years.

[No Limit]

I never understood the concept of withholding sex. Unless of course you are the psycho type and try to get your BF to cheat so you can break up with him and run your mouth without having to make things up.

 

Interesting to see nonetheless. I've asked myself why I want a relationship, and found no reason either. Guess I'm too happy on my own.

[Tayken]

Since many women are so quick to hop in the sack, a guy can have sex with her before he decides whether or not he actually wants to date her. When that happens, she basically becomes fwb. When she gets tired of it she will post on LS about how he used her for sex. That's pretty much how I see it happening.

 

Unless it was forced which then makes it an assault, then it's called willing participant, and she might have been thinking with her you know what at the time. Many have admitted that looks will make the pants drop, and in their delusional way of thinking, they assume that they can make the guy want them more and change him along the way

 

Until most women actually stop thinking all men want is sex, they will just continue making the same mistakes, and keep falling for the look factor with major disappointments in the end. Eventually, they will get hold and then slim pickings because the older men are now looking at younger women.

[RedRobin]

Since many women are so quick to hop in the sack, a guy can have sex with her before he decides whether or not he actually wants to date her. When that happens, she basically becomes fwb. When she gets tired of it she will post on LS about how he used her for sex. That's pretty much how I see it happening.

 

 

From what I've seen on LS, lots of men hop in the sack before she decides whether or not she actually wants a relationship with him either.

 

 

Not my style, but it seems that lots of people these days are having sex with near strangers... and then wondering why a decent relationship doesn't evolve out of it.

 

 

It really does benefit the man to use more discretion about whom he sleeps with too...if he is looking for a relationship and wants to avoid a lot of drama... and for women looking for a relationship, they should avoid men who have no discretion or self-control and try to put the burden on her.

 

 

Meaningful relationships rarely evolve from stranger or near stranger early sex encounters. Even here, where the guys claim to be married to a woman they had sex with on the first date, blah blah... it was almost always a woman they had known for awhile before actually going on a date with her. So they weren't strangers.