Things can change so fast!!

[Firestarter1069]

So last night I'm at the bar having a few beers watching football when out of nowhere I had the urge to send her a text. I reach in my pocket for my phone and I see a text from her on my home screen. It was delivered an hour and a half earlier and the topic of the text was pretty much the same thing I was going to text her. For the record I wasn't going to text her I was just going to get my phone out and put it right back down, I've done that before when I felt the urge to text her.

 

Needless to say I responded since it was if my mind was read. I know I said I wasn't going to talk to her unless her initial contact was about "us" but I guess I couldn't help it. We exchanged messages about this topic and text like we always did. She then says, "I feel as if I need to give you a little more detail as to what I meant by getting myself right meant." Her father died a few years ago which led to issues within her immediate family. Apparently something came up that involved legal issues with the estate. She told me rather then drag me into her problems it was best to take the time to get all this settled. I told her I wish she would have told me that right away, I would have been by her side the whole way. There are still 2 more hearings in January and she asked me once that's over with, if I'm willing to, she'd like to sit down and talk about us.

 

I asked her why did it take until now for her to tell me all this. She told me she's been talking to her 2 friends that have spoke to me and said that she was embarrassed about all the things that happened between us and felt that she needed to fully explain herself and her condition was preventing that from happening. She also asked me if she can text me to have conversations like we used to and since I told her I value her as a friend I told her she can text me without hesitation. The conversation ended with her telling me she misses me and is looking forward to our talks again. I did not respond to that final text, put my phone down and watched the rest of the football games.

[Chi townD]

Hmmm.... I don't know dude. Her having problems with her family and her fathers estate seems pretty flimsy of an excuse to end a loving relationship over.

 

 

If I had to guess. And it's just a theory. I theorize that when her father died, that left a big hole in her. And she was devastated. Therefore, she learned to put up barriers between herself and others. Not saying that she doesn't allow people to get close to her. But, if she starts getting too close to someone, then she puts up a wall and pushes people away because in the end, people will leave her. And with her fathers death, she doesn't want to experience that kind of pain of losing someone that close to her ever again.

 

 

However, her heart and feelings aren't allowing her to let go of you completely. She got too close.

 

 

That's my guess.

[DrReplyInRhymes]

With all due respect, to me it sounds like an excuse,

but take what I say lightly since I'm jaded and my thinking is obtuse,

I had a very similar story , the first few pages I thought I read my own,

but in the end, she admitted everything and her true colors were shown.

 

However, with your situation, I'm inclined to say,

She's considerate as hell to keep your feelings out of the way,

As much as I don't believe her excuse, and I caution you as such,

Because she admitted before she'd do this, and did it when it got rough.

 

As much as you feel for her, and liked the connection with her too,

I suggest you try again, but with an understanding of this truth,

She warned you before she pushes good people away,

And as others have stated, she may repeat this behavior in spades.

[Firestarter1069]

With all due respect, to me it sounds like an excuse,

but take what I say lightly since I'm jaded and my thinking is obtuse,

I had a very similar story , the first few pages I thought I read my own,

but in the end, she admitted everything and her true colors were shown.

 

However, with your situation, I'm inclined to say,

She's considerate as hell to keep your feelings out of the way,

As much as I don't believe her excuse, and I caution you as such,

Because she admitted before she'd do this, and did it when it got rough.

 

As much as you feel for her, and liked the connection with her too,

I suggest you try again, but with an understanding of this truth,

She warned you before she pushes good people away,

And as others have stated, she may repeat this behavior in spades.

 

I see where you and others are coming from, but I am going to hear her out when the dust clears. I did know about the estate thing, but like she told me she was certain everything was clear. Thinking back I do remember her reading a piece of mail in early August about the scenario that was sent from a lawyer that upset her a little bit, but she told me it was only minor and after we talked about it(she let me read it) everything was fine it was just a little hiccup at THAT time. As it turned out it was that little hiccup that escalated to what ended up happening. If after these hearings she wants to talk about pursuing what we had then I'm willing to give it another shot. Of course there will be a lot to discuss with her before I jump back into the relationship.

[Itspointless]

However, with your situation, I'm inclined to say,

She's considerate as hell to keep your feelings out of the way,

As much as I don't believe her excuse, and I caution you as such,

Because she admitted before she'd do this, and did it when it got rough.[...] she may repeat this behavior in spades.

I believe she believes that. I was told the same, plus the fact that she had to do it alone, because she always does. I am sure that she will take distance again when something stressful happens. If you can live with the fact that she decides how you two walk and when you walk alone than it might work.

[Diezel]

Abandonment issues.

 

RUN. RUN. RUN. RUN. RUN.