Grevensteiner Posted November 18, 2014 Share Posted November 18, 2014 I dont even know where to begin...I know her for 5 months, shes 19, Im 21. Right now I am in a friendzone relationship with a little commitment - we meet 3-5 times a week, she calls me everyday, texts all the time, passionate kissing on every meeting, shes very opej sexually, I can even massage her boobs or put a hand between her legs. But it still is a friendzone - there was no sex, she just doesnt want to do that. And even though we agreed to be exclusive, were not in a relationship. As she said - shes emotionally attached to me, but doesnt feel the way it should be in a relationship, we dont act like a relationship, and were not in one. Also, she doesnt want to begin it, and just says...carpe diem, and well see what happens. And so I end up frustrated, angry, and wasting a lot of time developing that hope inside me. How can I move it to a relationship? Can it happen? Just continue what I was doing, keep pressuring for sex a little, and wait till she attaches more? Whats my best choice, and what chances do I have? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Dadittude Posted November 19, 2014 Share Posted November 19, 2014 It is going to feel a little counterintuitive, but I would back away....just a bit... and man up. I am going to guess that she knows exactly how you feel about her. You may have even openly told her. I think you are making your feelings a little too obvious, that you would roll over and let her pet your soft underbelly. She know you're safe, and she knows you aren't going anywhere. She is in control. You need to be a little more alpha. Pull back and just give her a taste, that you might not be as interested as she thinks. It has to be subtle or she will see through you like a plate glass window, but let her feel that you have options and aren't afraid to walk away.....SUBTLY Link to post Share on other sites
Kamila Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 It's the push and pull. Very hard to master, but highly effective. When one pulls away, the other must push a bit, and vice versa. That's how you create a positive tension, till you get closer, and closer ... Link to post Share on other sites
dogtags Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 Seriously. Get a girlfriend. I had the same thing with one of my friends. I got a gf then she made sure that was ruined then we slept together. Be careful though because if she doesnt see you like that, the whole push pull thing is basde on jealousy and not her real feelings As i just found out! Link to post Share on other sites
DrReplyInRhymes Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 I disagree with this one time and the push and pull method, especially if this woman is fairly big breasted. Her saying "carpe diem, and well see what happens." really tells me That maybe you should tell her that you want to have sex and stop being a tease. In my experiences, a woman wants a man who goes after what he likes. Not in a creepy, rapey way, but a confident alpha strike. Being sexual with you, but not wanting to start a thing, Tells me that she wants you to take charge, but keep it as a fling. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grevensteiner Posted November 23, 2014 Author Share Posted November 23, 2014 I did tell her that, and she replied that it's actually pretty stupid to plan having sex Ok, so a couple of days ago something strange happened. I invited her to my house, made some sexy atmosphere, threw her on the bed, kissing, she was only in her pants, sucking her nip...ah well, a foreplay anyways, and when I wanted to take her pants off, she stopped me and said "no". Well that's quite of a turn off Of course it didn't change our relation, everything's as usual, and she still wants to come to my house, like even tomorrow. What the hell? Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 Uh, if you are at least kissing her, you aren't in the friendzone. If anything you sound like you two are friends with benefits but the benefits haven't fully started yet. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grevensteiner Posted November 23, 2014 Author Share Posted November 23, 2014 Well yeah, even meetings 5 times a week, getting texts like "I miss you" all the time etc...I don't understand, why would she invest that much of her time and effort without wanting to have sex or a relationship? Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 Don't worry about what she says about a relationship. She obviously likes you but she seems confused. As for the sex, just keep doing what you normally do. Eventually she'll give in. Have you tried to finger her with her pants on? Another thing you can do is when you get her shirt off, just take off all of your clothes and have her touch you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grevensteiner Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 Ok, I did finger her. Now after that shes become cold and distant. I have very little contact with her. Uh. I dont get it. Link to post Share on other sites
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