me understand his actions... I'm trying to make sense of it all

[momto3boys]

Some of you may have seen my story. I'm on my 2nd separation. Last one lasted 6 months. He had drug related issues and infidelity issues after returning from Afghanistan.he dated this girl right after we split. Kicked out of the military for drugs and moved back home. We reconciled for 2 years and within those 2 years had a daughter. Things I thought were better. Towards the end he started acting weird. When I questioned him about it he said he was leavings moved out the next day. We are now almost into our 7th month of separation. I've heard from someone he was talking to a girl (his now girlfriend) and possibly even left for her. But We were sleeping together on and off up until he started "dating" this girl in oct. That's when he told me he started dating her. That's also when things changed. He's 27... She's 20. I am 30. Now that he has this girlfriend he has quit his 2nd job and is quitting school... (He gets paid 1800 to go to school). He says he's quitting all of it because he worked nonstop when we were together because I was a stay at home mom and now it's my time to do all the working. Now all of a sudden he wants the kids more... Before I had to hunt him down to take them. Anyways, we had an agreement that he's pay my rent and cell phone the first year. Well he has slowly taken things away from me... As of next Saturday I'm on my own about my phone... And in feb he's done with school so I'm on my own with my rent. He's horrible to me... Telling me he hates me, he's much happier now, that I "keep" him say from my kids (he takes them every Sunday for the whole day... That's the only day he does not work). I am trying to be friendly... I give him school work from our son, school pics, etc. Yet he is still mean to me. I do not understand why he is no longer trying to help financially. I work full time, I pay for everything (including child care for 4 kids which is expensive!) but my rent and cell phone and that's because he said he'd help until I got on my feet since I was a stay at home mom for 7 years and he left quickly and didn't pay anything at all for months.

 

He keeps saying his girlfriend has nothing to do with it but before the girlfriend he was helping as much as he could. He was also nice to me but now is cruel to me. He keeps sayin he's not paying for me the rest of his life and his moving on with his life and he wants me out of his life. (I am put of his life except when he picks the kids up and drops them off and I keep conversation about the kids). I'm really confused. How do I get him to back off and stop being so mean.

[BetrayedH]

Haven't read your threads but I suspect you need legal agreements on support and custody. He's trying to move on with life and detach from you. It's not honorable for him to fail to meet his initial verbal agreement. People suck.

[momto3boys]

We go to mediation in January . That's the scariest part is just waiting for the court date ad it's taking forever. And while we are waiting he's slowly taking everything away from me and trying to get out of paying: