mrs rubble Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 Did you sign a pre-nup? You go on a lot about $$$$$$$$, I hope the wife ends up with half. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rollercoaster2014 Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 Did you sign a pre-nup? You go on a lot about $$$$$$$$, I hope the wife ends up with half. Why do you hope that? How does she deserve even a $$ of what I have worked for all my life? I don't even understand the logic behind alimony, etc. Why should a woman or man continue to get payments if they are no longer in your life. No difference between that and robbery. And no I didn't sign a pre-nup but if I decide to leave, I'll leave quick enough so I don't have to pay much. I hate gold diggers...trashy people. Btw, my wife is not a gold digger at all. Link to post Share on other sites
mrs rubble Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 Why do you hope that? How does she deserve even a $$ of what I have worked for all my life? I don't even understand the logic behind alimony, etc. Why should a woman or man continue to get payments if they are no longer in your life. No difference between that and robbery. And no I didn't sign a pre-nup but if I decide to leave, I'll leave quick enough so I don't have to pay much. I hate gold diggers...trashy people. Btw, my wife is not a gold digger at all. Why do I hope that? Because you're too mean spirited to even buy your wife a birthday present despite endlessly bragging about how much you earn! You deserve to learn a lesson on worth! Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 He was much less educated, men less $$ than her, was less fit, was older, etc and a cheater! Maybe he had a big...............................heart ??? Mr. Lucky 2 Link to post Share on other sites
rester Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 Sounds like you're seeking perfection. Do you have male friends you could discuss this with? I'd be curious what they would suggest. Seems like an easy enough thing to talk about over a few beers. I could see my buddies slapping me upside the head telling me to not ruin a good thing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author rollercoaster2014 Posted November 25, 2014 Author Share Posted November 25, 2014 Sounds like you're seeking perfection. Do you have male friends you could discuss this with? I'd be curious what they would suggest. Seems like an easy enough thing to talk about over a few beers. I could see my buddies slapping me upside the head telling me to not ruin a good thing. I've discussed it with a couple of close confidants. One is a man whore and told me my wife is outstanding and that I'd be an idiot to give her up to life his lifestyle. I think he's honest but he is also a manwhore so what do I know. He is actually one reason I keep thinking of ruining my marriage. Every time I call the guy, he's f***ing a new girl. He doesn't have a lot more to offer than me (a bit taller and relatively charming but I have a few things on him as well). The other guys is dating someone now for about a year but was a low grade manwhore. He also thinks I am an idiot. I haven't discussed in detail with too many other people but superficial conversations echo what most people on this thread have been saying: don't ruin a good relationship to chase perfection/sexual variety/adventure. Link to post Share on other sites
Allumere Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 Marital property is split....she would be entitled to half. You do in fact need counseling. Your thinking is so off.. If your wife were to read this it would destroy her. To have the person you love and chose to spend you life with reduced the relationship to really nothing more than a check in the box; to find out that the person you think is your best friend and supporter has so little respect for you as a person.... absolutely heartbreaking Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 It sounds like you and your wife are an example of excellent compatibility. Too bad you take her for granted. I suspect that, one day, you'll regret it. Don't know what you've got until it's.....gone! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gofsttrnlft Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 I agree that I may come off as arrogant/narcissistic but on paper I offer the types of things women want (career, money, reasonable looks, fitness, social aptitude, listening skills, life experience, sexual drive). It's funny that I am vilified for my thoughts but no one criticizes all the women who used to think they were too hot for me in their younger years. This will be my last comment as I do not want to beat you up over your feelings. There are very few women, I believe, that care about all of the "qualities" you listed if you are going to treat them bad, like they are beneath you, because you feel that these qualities allow for you to look down on them. If you do find one then they are there for the money and comfort, period. They would be in love with the money and comfort, period. If that is what you really desire then giddy-up. I feel so sorry for your wife that she has to endure your hard feelings for certain real or imagined "injustices" by girls in your past. You are being "vilified" because you entered into a marriage as an adult and now you look down on her for completely unbelievable reasons to most, maybe all, who have read your original post. I see a future where your wife is in a relationship with a man's man who adores her and appreciates her for every thread of her being, and she is happy. I see you alone and miserable with your intelligence and money, wondering how you could be so stupid... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
dichotomy Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 (edited) Lets list most of the compatibility and marriage woes listed here - painful ones - Sexual compatibility - lack of sex. - Trust/Loyalty issues - Stabbing you in back - Not respecting or loving you - arguments of household chores and maintenance or paying bills Sounds like you got all that and more. See its easy to go find people (rich intellectuals) to chat about politics and money. I imagine any number of groups you could join to get these needs met - right? and your not doing anything wrong by joining these groups to get those needs met. Sitting around in a nice club talking stock futures and the 2016 elections. Kind of the equivalent of a sports nut going to the bar to see his football buddies when the wife is not into sports. But were you going to find sexual compatibility trust, love, pleasantness, got your back spouse? Not many places ... You are a lucky man - read the posts here of true incompatibility - then kiss your wife and tell her how lucky you are. You need to respect and treasure what you have ... Edited November 26, 2014 by dichotomy 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TigerLilly78 Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 I dated my wife for 3.5 years before marriage. So we knew each other very well. I know I come off as arrogant/ungrateful/etc but it seems to me that for educated men with options the market heavily favors the man because quality of male partners has significantly decreased in the modern era. So my mind starts wandering whether I should have settled down with this amazing woman or had gone on a crazy dating/sexual adventure to find an elite woman in every sense. I feel really bad talking like this because my wife is such a good human being. Another thing that bothers me is that she was previously married to someone who I consider inferior to me (sorry to use this term but in the dating market, there are hierarchies. He was much less educated, men less $$ than her, was less fit, was older, etc and a cheater!). So sometimes I guess I think about my wife as a commodity (which is really bad). If he could have her, then maybe I can get something much much grander (again, very narcissistic of me). But my wife has some amazing qualities that many people lack and that is why i decided to marry her. Im sorry I don't care how much money you make and how great a man you "think" you are! I would never date you ill take a hardworking down to earth kind heated man over a narcissistic self absorbed boy any day. Sorry if this is harsh but you talk about that poor women like she means nothing to you like an old model cell phone that you want to upgrade because you deserve better I hope she reads what your saying some how and leaves you... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 I've discussed it with a couple of close confidants. One is a man whore and told me my wife is outstanding and that I'd be an idiot to give her up to life his lifestyle. I think he's honest but he is also a manwhore so what do I know. He is actually one reason I keep thinking of ruining my marriage. Every time I call the guy, he's f***ing a new girl. He doesn't have a lot more to offer than me (a bit taller and relatively charming but I have a few things on him as well). The other guys is dating someone now for about a year but was a low grade manwhore. He also thinks I am an idiot. So far your pursuit of perfection is based on input from two close confidants, both manwhores though one's low grade. And one's taller and charming while the other one think's you're an idiot. This would be funny if it wasn't so sad... Mr. Lucky 7 Link to post Share on other sites
TigerLilly78 Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 I agree that I may come off as arrogant/narcissistic but on paper I offer the types of things women want (career, money, reasonable looks, fitness, social aptitude, listening skills, life experience, sexual drive). It's funny that I am vilified for my thoughts but no one criticizes all the women who used to think they were too hot for me in their younger years. Market values change and mine has steadily increased over time. Perhaps, I am partly seeking to play the field to make myself feel good about being easily able to play those girls who used to reject me. Part of me wants to become real dark...keep dating and using women for my own sick desires and dump them when my needs are met. Of course, all of it in a consensual and mature (at least on the surface) manner. But, of course, I could also choose my lovely wife who deserves everything in the world because she is so pure and beautiful. I need counselling, that is for sure. The demons are killing me. I wish I had gotten everything out of my system before marriage so I wouldn't hurt this amazing woman. So were not supose to feel sorry for a other wise innocent women just cause some of the ones in your past screwed you around? Oh please..join the club.. you are correct in one way you need help I sincerely advise you show your wife this thread and start to get it.. Link to post Share on other sites
LittleTiger Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 Reading this thread is starting to make me nauseous! OP, do your lovely wife a favour and leave her before she wastes any more of her precious life on a man who clearly doesn't love her. You think you're a prize catch and you can do better - so go for it. For her sake you should tell her the truth about why you're leaving - just so she understands what kind of man you are and doesn't grieve the marriage for too long. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Thegreatestthing Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 Elaine makes a great point the intellectually stimulating one may be totally adverse to housewifery if that's what you want, but probably not. Your wife sounds a bit dull and mainstream but who isn't these days, it's basics all round hence the popularity of Taylor swift ,someone's buying all those albums. As far as tackling the demons,wanting to make amends for some lost youth,or avenge some early rejection,I think bedding a bunch of girls would make you happy briefly ,but wouldn't fulfil you in any real way. You can't really change your wife you can't make her curious about things that she doesn't care about so it looks like you'll be talking about Kim ks ass for a long time yet. In five years, after you got past being "in love" and the exciting stuff a new relationship brings, you have now taken stock and have realised the huge difference in the two of you, as regards what makes you both tick. She is not intellectually your equal and that is now getting to be a problem in the relationship for you. So whilst all the qualities she has and you list, will make an excellent homemaker and mother for your children, and a supportive, loyal partner for you, you have to ask yourself if that is indeed enough and I guess, reading between the lines, that it isn't. You have outgrown her, you have taken what she can teach you, but now it appears, she can teach you no more. However, you have to be careful for what you wish for, because if you do truly want the picket fence lifestyle, then the more intellectually challenging person you think you want now, may not be content to be just the homemaker. Link to post Share on other sites
Got it Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 Why do you hope that? How does she deserve even a $$ of what I have worked for all my life? I don't even understand the logic behind alimony, etc. Why should a woman or man continue to get payments if they are no longer in your life. No difference between that and robbery. And no I didn't sign a pre-nup but if I decide to leave, I'll leave quick enough so I don't have to pay much. I hate gold diggers...trashy people. Btw, my wife is not a gold digger at all. Because during the period that you have been married the law see that any advancements made in your career have been done with the support of your wife so she is entitled to her share of the funds. Why the need to be so greedy? If this really such a concern of yours you have grossly failed in become far more familiar with state and federal laws involving marital assets as well as protecting your stance/assets by a prenup, etc. If this was so important why didn't you do anything to minimize the impact? That doesn't sounds like sound business mindset. Quite foolish. Regardless of you sentiment the law is the law. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Copelandsanity Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 (edited) Best advice I can give is spend some time thinking about how you can fulfill your wife's needs. Think about something you can do that's spontaneous, makes her feel significant, contributes to her life, and helps the both of you progress as a couple. And go do it. That - in a nutshell - is the secret to being much happier and more fulfilled about your marriage. Edited November 26, 2014 by Copelandsanity 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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