Really messed up with girl

[Mason888]

I slept with my chick friend and we both were in the friend zone. I started to have feeling for her and wanted her to like me. She is easy to get with (which sounds messed up), but it bothered me when she wasn't going after me. I know she wants me and she even said I was good looking. We hugged, hold hands, cuddle, and even kiss. That probably shouldn't matter because she is promiscuous and it's comfortable with doing all this without considering it would lead to something (relationship). But because she considered me in the friend zone, it didn't consider her to want to sleep with me. This was my fault because I would treat her as a friend when really I shouldn't to avoid this in the first place. It didn't occur to me at the moment. Anyway we finally had sex after drinking alcohol. We both wanted it but didn't want things to get awkward. We both planned on drinking to avoid this. And yet it happened. I would tease her that she really wanted me but didn't want to pursue it.

 

After drinking, she hopped on me and I knew she wanted me. Although, alcohol was involved it showed her affection toward me. I tried backing her off to show that she was the weak one and continued watching TV, but she still insisted. Finally, we went slow and then I went for the kill. We hung out couple days later and I accidentally told her that I told my friends we had sex. She's promiscuous and she knows that. But the fact I told my friends pissed her off. I feel so bad. She was stressed that day as well and was slightly tired. from work. So probably all this maybe built up inside? I didn't get a goodbye or even a hug. I just walked out feeling like ****. Is it over? Should I just ignore it and move on? Should I apologize? I don't want to be weak. This sounds messed up, but I know things WILL be weird as I try to fix this. I feel like this is something I need her to cool off and let her come back. If not, oh well I will move on because it's hard to be friends with a chick who I have feelings for who is promiscuous. It's hard seeing her go after this guy right in front me which she does. I act like I don't care because I know it's fair game, but just being in a friend zone caused her to do this without thinking it would hurt my feelings and my intentions were to help her. Which it was at first, but not anymore. I feel like a pillow or tool. I was just trying to be nice, but I guessed that what shot me in the foot.

 

Anyway, what should I do?

 

I do want her not be mad at me anymore. I don't mind being her friend either, but I also don't mind moving on because my friends warned me about chicks like this. She isn't a bad person, but I did screw up which I do feel bad for. However, like I mentioned I still don't mind moving on because it's hard being her friend. She is nice and stuff, we also have a lot in common. I know she needs me as friend because her life is difficult and she barely has any good friends. I feel like I can be there for her (which also sucks!!). Also guys who sleep with her end up leaving her. I can probably see why that it's a typical guy thing or the type of girl she is.

 

I'm at the point now to see what are my options are & go from there. Whatever goes, goes...

Edited December 2, 2014 by Mason888