Does it ever surprise you how predictable physical attraction is?

[JuneJulySeptember]

Let's say a man is born. He's about a 4 out of 10.

 

He lives his life as a 4, going about his dailies. He goes to high school. Meets women. Goes to college, meets some more women. He gets a job, and starts making $. He starts hitting on women in bars, doing online dating.

 

Over the course of the first 20 years of his life after puberty, the man will literally meet millions of women, thousands of which are attractive women, say 7s and 8s.

 

Does it ever surprise you that out of all of those thousands of significantly more attractive women he meets, there isn't at least one that thinks he is hot? Just purely looks hot. Comes up to him at a bar, or online and says, "You're handsome. I want to tear your underwear off with my teeth."

 

But we all know that doesn't happen. It never happens. Is anybody ever surprised by how predictable physical attraction is?

[Under The Radar]

Physical attraction isn't predictable from person to person ...... it's subjective.

 

The "4" you think is ugly could be an "8" to someone else.

 

That's what is so great about attraction ...... it varies considerably.

[truth_seeker]

I know guys who will avoid "hot" women because they're insecure and do not like the idea of other guys wanting their woman and dealing with it constantly.

 

I knew a guy who told me about his wife: "She's good. She's pretty but not hot. Not attractive to the point every guy wants to bang her... but good that I'm comfortable and don't have to worry."

 

That's some guys for ya...

[newmoon]

if he starts making money he should invest it in looking more like a 7 or 8 and not staying a 4.

[Mangina]

Under.The.Radar;6030998]Physical attraction isn't predictable from person to person ...... it's subjective.

 

The "4" you think is ugly could be an "8" to someone else.

 

That's what is so great about attraction ...... it varies considerably.

You seem to have missed the whole point of his post. Did you read it?

[Mangina]

I know guys who will avoid "hot" women because they're insecure and do not like the idea of other guys wanting their woman and dealing with it constantly.

 

I knew a guy who told me about his wife: "She's good. She's pretty but not hot. Not attractive to the point every guy wants to bang her... but good that I'm comfortable and don't have to worry."

 

That's some guys for ya...

What does that have to do with this?

[Mangina]

June July September you make a statement and every body knows what you are talking about but act like they do not have a clue it is like the elephant in the room.

[JuneJulySeptember]

I have a friend like that. Nice guy, funny, with a great personality, but dude never gets laid. Ever. He goes to parties with his best friend almost every weekend and meets women. Those women go for his best friend every single time. It never fails.

 

Yea. But personality aside, wouldn't you think at least one of the tens of thousands of hot women your friend meets in his life would be like, "WHOA! That dude is HOT."

 

But you are I both know that doesn't happen. Is the reason instinct/primitive or total media brainwash?

[Under The Radar]

Under.The.Radar;6030998]Physical attraction isn't predictable from person to person ...... it's subjective.

 

The "4" you think is ugly could be an "8" to someone else.

 

That's what is so great about attraction ...... it varies considerably.

You seem to have missed the whole point of his post. Did you read it?

 

I read it.

 

Oh ...... and I didn't miss his point.

 

You missed mine

[Mangina]

I have a friend like that. Nice guy, funny, with a great personality, but dude never getsd. Ever. He goes to parties with his best friend almost every weekend and meets women. Those women go for his best friend every single time. It never fails.

That sounds like me. Girls walk up to my friend all the time

[Mangina]

You seem to have missed the whole point of his post. Did you read it?

 

I read it.

 

Oh ...... and I didn't miss his point.

 

You missed mine

No I did not. You said someone's 8 can be someone else's 4. He asked why out of thousands of girls and 20 years no one though he was an eight. Please read again

[truth_seeker]

What does that have to do with this?

 

I felt like mentioning it.

[Mangina]

if he starts making money he should invest it in looking more like a 7 or 8 and not staying a 4.

I was thinking about plastic surgery

[Rejected Rosebud]

Okay first of all no man was "born" a 4 or any other number, as to the rest, I am sure there are some women who will find you attractive. I believe that attractiveness is pretty subjective but there are some who were just blessed with exceptional good looks and have charisma. The more average among us sometimes need to get to know a person before they will be floored by our sexy hotness!! But seriously, of course physical attraction is fairly predictable. If you will admit it you have seen women who knock your socks off and others who you didn't even pause to look at …

[Eternal Sunshine]

Why would a woman that is 7-8 think that a guy that is 4 is hot?

 

Realistically, attraction is not that subjective. I never expect a guy that is 10 to find me hot. The only guys that do find me hot are below average looking. That's life. We all want the same things...we don't get them so we settle for what's best out of our options. I am sure that there is/was a woman that's not that attractive that likes/liked you. I also bet that you overlook her and long for hotties.

 

Life is not a Disney movie. There are looks leagues and there are some ways to overcome them; men with status and money; women with youth or occasionally sparkling, outgoing, confident personality. To trade up, there is something you have to offer that other men in your league don't. And no, it's not simply being "nice". That's common enough.

[NJ123]

Why would a woman that is 7-8 think that a guy that is 4 is hot?

 

Realistically, attraction is not that subjective. I never expect a guy that is 10 to find me hot. The only guys that do find me hot are below average looking. That's life. We all want the same things...we don't get them so we settle for what's best out of our options. I am sure that there is/was a woman that's not that attractive that likes/liked you. I also bet that you overlook her and long for hotties.

 

Life is not a Disney movie. There are looks leagues and there are some ways to overcome them; men with status and money; women with youth or occasionally sparkling, outgoing, confident personality. To trade up, there is something you have to offer that other men in your league don't. And no, it's not simply being "nice". That's common enough.

 

I've seen your pics that you posted on here & I don't think you're below average. And I'm usually rated a 7 or an 8, at least that's what I've been told.

[todreaminblue]

all people are created tens.......to somebody.......i have met a lot of tens......then they start speaking and it goes down........a little...sometimes a whole load........most men i have been attracted have a brightness to them it isnt their looks i am attracted to....if i were to rate myself i would be a .....three maybe on physical looks i like the number three anyway....but i have something special...havent worked out what it is...nor do i think the guys know that are attracted to me ...because i am often not their type..i also feel as another poster said......attraction si subjective.....to most people........deb

[Under The Radar]

Exactly ...... attraction isn't JUST about physical appearance.

 

I don't care if someone is a "10" on the looks scale if their personality is a "2".

 

I care just as much about IQ, EQ, sense of humor, humility, etc...

[BlueIris]

No, it doesn't surprise me.

 

Don't waste your precious time worrying about your physical appearance. Do something that challenges you and makes you feel good.

[SincereOnlineGuy]

Let's say a man is born. He's about a 4 out of 10.

 

He lives his life as a 4, going about his dailies. He goes to high school. Meets women. Goes to college, meets some more women. He gets a job, and starts making $. He starts hitting on women in bars, doing online dating.

 

Over the course of the first 20 years of his life after puberty, the man will literally meet millions of women, thousands of which are attractive women, say 7s and 8s.

 

Does it ever surprise you that out of all of those thousands of significantly more attractive women he meets, there isn't at least one that thinks he is hot? Just purely looks hot. Comes up to him at a bar, or online and says, "You're handsome. I want to tear your underwear off with my teeth."

 

But we all know that doesn't happen. It never happens. Is anybody ever surprised by how predictable physical attraction is?

 

 

 

 

This makes no sense.

 

During a span of 20 years, in order to meet "millions" of women (minimum, 2 million), a person would have to meet 273 women per day, and this is somebody doing online dating in addition to all of that.

 

Now perhaps I've had occasional days where I've met 273 women, but not seven thousand such days in a row.

 

His high school... lets just say, 2000 students, so there are a total of 3500 unique fellow students over 4 years - and he meets every single one of the 1750-ish female students. Either he's going to have to make-up a whole lot of shortages in his adult life, OR, in addition to every female in the student body, this high school student is going to have to meet an additional 272 women per day while he is in his high school years!

 

He'd have to be the guy selling Euphoria at the rave parties every night to keep meeting them at that rate. Though in that scenario, there WOULD likely be several very attractive women actually telling him that they would like to tear his underwear off with their teeth.

 

Your data is unrealistic, as is any premise derived from such absurd data.

[sillyanswer]

Is anybody ever surprised by how predictable physical attraction is?

 

 

The problem (well, one of them) with these numbers is that the scale isn't objective. Another problem is that attraction is far more complicated than something you can distil down to a ten point scale. You've described him as a 4, so I think you mean that he's at the lower end of 'average' (whatever that is) but he may have some qualities that some women will find attractive.

 

Am I surprised when an attractive woman finds an unattractive man attractive? Yes, until I remember that just because I don't think that he's attractive doesn't mean anything about how she perceives him. Maybe she's got bad eyesight, or maybe she sees something that I've missed. Good for her!

[JuneJulySeptember]

Why would a woman that is 7-8 think that a guy that is 4 is hot?

 

Realistically, attraction is not that subjective. I never expect a guy that is 10 to find me hot. The only guys that do find me hot are below average looking. That's life. We all want the same things...we don't get them so we settle for what's best out of our options. I am sure that there is/was a woman that's not that attractive that likes/liked you. I also bet that you overlook her and long for hotties.

 

Life is not a Disney movie. There are looks leagues and there are some ways to overcome them; men with status and money; women with youth or occasionally sparkling, outgoing, confident personality. To trade up, there is something you have to offer that other men in your league don't. And no, it's not simply being "nice". That's common enough.

 

Right. You totally get it. But doesn't that surprise you?

 

It's such a big and chaotic world, where amazing random acts of nature happen.

 

Wouldn't you think that at least one woman who was a 7 would have found a guy who was a 4 hot?

 

And no, I have never rejected a woman because of her looks, but anyway, it's not really about that.

[serial muse]

No I did not. You said someone's 8 can be someone else's 4. He asked why out of thousands of girls and 20 years no one though he was an eight. Please read again

 

I read all the posts and I think a more relevant point is that the entire thing is hypothetical. He's suggesting a "4" is walking around and nobody thinks he's hot, ever. How do we know this? Who is this 4? What's his name and what does he do for a living? How do we know what women are thinking? [women, as a rule, do not go up to even so-called 10s or 8s and say "I want to rip your clothes off"] Etc. [spoiler: his name is "null", because he's just a creation of the OP's to prove a pet point]

 

So, all the posters pointing out that attraction is subjective are entirely on topic. It's perfectly reasonable to respond to a hypothetical by pointing out: In reality, things are subjective. And anyone who's bothered to actually read posts by women on LS over the years, and also who maybe lives in the world and knows some of them, is aware that women can and do find unconventionally attractive men attractive. You guys might even call them "4s". I don't know, because I think the number thing is dumb. But whatever.

 

On a different note, I read the OP's post and am just imagining all these different numbers walking around, drinking coffee, having a smoke, wearing little bowler hats. A charming picture.

Edited December 3, 2014 by serial muse

[Giggle]

If you are talking simply initial first impression then probably not as much but you are greatly discounting the difference between what people are attracted to. There are many people that seem sooo much better looking once you get to know them. My favorite quote is from Doctor Who and states just that. I currently think my bf is fking hot, but wasn't attracted to him at first. He was just eh.

[Got it]

I got stuck on the idea that the OP believes that women go up to any man and tells a perfect stranger they want to remove his under garments orally.

 

Not saying it isn't done but I promise that is GROSSLY in the exception rule.

 

The rest of it is just a self defeating assumption towards self pity.