Art_Critic Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 I say let your erection do all the talking.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author AVarma Posted December 4, 2014 Author Share Posted December 4, 2014 I'm 28 for those of you who are wondering. I'm probably going to go d0nnivain's route and just shut up about it. I don't I'd do very good with the whole awkward "why are you still a virgin" conversation anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AVarma Posted December 4, 2014 Author Share Posted December 4, 2014 Unlike some men who relish "getting there 1st" most women will back away; they don't want the pressure of being your 1st time. If they find out later that is what happened, that's OK but not before. If things are awkward, she'll be more likely to assume you two don't have enough experience with each other rather than you have no experience at all. I'm surprised by this to be honest. I assumed that women would be angry that a guy wasn't completely honest with them about being a virgin and somehow it signaled that he didn't trust them. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 I'm surprised by this to be honest. I assumed that women would be angry that a guy wasn't completely honest with them about being a virgin and somehow it signaled that he didn't trust them. You have so much to learn grasshopper 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 I'm surprised by this to be honest. I assumed that women would be angry that a guy wasn't completely honest with them about being a virgin and somehow it signaled that he didn't trust them. It's not about trust. It's about being The Guy. You are supposed to be the leader, the alpha. If you don't know what you are doing, she has to lead & she doesn't want to think about the fact that you can't. Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 I'm surprised by this to be honest. I assumed that women would be angry that a guy wasn't completely honest with them about being a virgin and somehow it signaled that he didn't trust them. By using that logic then you need to tell her about the peanuts in your turds and the nose hairs in your boogers because otherwise you wouldn't be being completely honest with her. Dude, some things are simply private and no one else's business. You don't need to tell her about that zit you popped on your butt and you don't need to tell her about your prior sexual experiences. It's none of her business. Your virginity is your business and your issue, not hers. It's not her business unless you make it her business. And if you make it her business, then you also make it her burden. When ever you put any kind of burden on a woman, you make sex less likely to occur. The quickest and most efficient way to retain your virginity is to make it burden the women in your life with it. If you are having sex with her, that indicates your trust in her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Jame22 Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 I'm surprised by this to be honest. I assumed that women would be angry that a guy wasn't completely honest with them about being a virgin and somehow it signaled that he didn't trust them. Well they might be angry if they asked you and you lied. But if they don't question you keep your mouth shut. Link to post Share on other sites
Jame22 Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 (edited) For, now kiss her, already. 4 dates is a long time for that not to have happened yet. Agreed You need to get the whole kissing/touching thing down before worrying about whether you're going to get laid. From my experience, if you're getting drinks or out to eat and she's interested she'll put her hands on the table and lean into you a little bit..lightly touch her somewhere on her hand and ask her about a ring she's wearing, a scar she has, compliment her nail polish ect. After you break the touch barrier the kiss is a piece of cake. I'm a 24 year old virgin and I've gotten so much more confident in the past year or so. Most of that confidence comes from just sucking it up and kissing her on the first date. You really have nothing to lose..they're either attracted to you or they're not. If she agreed to go out with you your chances are pretty good...take them. Edited December 4, 2014 by Jame22 1 Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 Well they might be angry if they asked you and you lied. But if they don't question you keep your mouth shut. I am 50 years old and have been with multiple women over the years and decades and I have never had one single female ever once ask me if I was virginal or not. Never once ever. Not even when was a virgin or shortly there after. Not once and not ever by any person ever. It never once ever happened even a single time....ever. My point is, women don't ask guys if they've ever had sex before or not. Did I make my point or do I need to explain it further??? Link to post Share on other sites
Jame22 Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 (edited) I am 50 years old and have been with multiple women over the years and decades and I have never had one single female ever once ask me if I was virginal or not. Never once ever. Not even when was a virgin or shortly there after. Not once and not ever by any person ever. It never once ever happened even a single time....ever. My point is, women don't ask guys if they've ever had sex before or not. Did I make my point or do I need to explain it further??? I've had it happen 3 times. 2 by friends who were probably just messing with me and one with a girl that I was playing around in bed with. It's rare but they do ask, at least in my experience. I'm sure it has something to do with the fact that I'm very good looking but display a socially awkward personality Edited December 4, 2014 by Jame22 Link to post Share on other sites
Allumere Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 I guess I am the odd gal out. If I was into a guy and we were dating seriously (a lil more there then some sparks) I wouldn't care either way. Would I ask? Hmmmm...I guess if I sensed extreme awkwardness in the moment or hestitation getting past 3rd base I might only because I'd want them to chill. Link to post Share on other sites
prettyinpink1 Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 (edited) When my guy told me he was a virgin I was actually relieved. I hate people who sleep around and I feel special I guess (: lol Edited December 4, 2014 by prettyinpink1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author AVarma Posted December 4, 2014 Author Share Posted December 4, 2014 When my guy told me he was a virgin I was actually relieved. I hate people who sleep around and I feel special I guess (: lol Relieved? How old was he? I hope that's not too personal of a question. Link to post Share on other sites
PogoStick Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 It all depends on the girl, her experience and personality. I can imagine a sweet girl who's really into you would enjoy guiding and being your first. The older the woman, the less likely you should tell her. Don't focus on sex, focus on the whole experience. Don't be afraid to communicate. When the time comes ask her where on her body she likes to be kissed. Try the indent between the collarbone and the neck. Move in slow motion, don't get too quick and excited. Have her tell you when you do something that feels good. Caress her body. Lightly suck on the line where her leg meets her body. Do well with all the other things and your performance of actual penetration will be less important. Figure out how to give her oral sex, and do it! Slow and soft, as she gets excited you can go faster and add more pressure. But anyway, you need to get the kiss out of the way! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 So I'm definitely the odd one out, but I'd feel pretty unhappy with a guy if I found out he was a Virgin after the fact. It would be a big strike against him if he didn't honestly tell me. Most of the men I've been with were unexperienced, so I am perfectly happy with virgins. I don't see it as "pressure" at all. I just want to know so that I can make the first time for him really amazing and worth the wait. I want to make it feel as amazing as possible for him. So, yeah, I would want to know first. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted December 4, 2014 Share Posted December 4, 2014 When my guy told me he was a virgin I was actually relieved. I hate people who sleep around and I feel special I guess (: lol I feel similar. When I find out a guy is a virgin or very inexperienced, it's a good thing. I don't really want to have sex with a guy whose penis has been in a large variety of other vaginas. Creeps me out, lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AVarma Posted December 5, 2014 Author Share Posted December 5, 2014 So I'm definitely the odd one out, but I'd feel pretty unhappy with a guy if I found out he was a Virgin after the fact. It would be a big strike against him if he didn't honestly tell me. Most of the men I've been with were unexperienced, so I am perfectly happy with virgins. I don't see it as "pressure" at all. I just want to know so that I can make the first time for him really amazing and worth the wait. I want to make it feel as amazing as possible for him. So, yeah, I would want to know first. I see. In all honesty, I'm leaning toward those who advocate just not saying anything, not because I agree with the whole "alpha" male idea, but honestly mostly because it will spare me an awkward conversation. Sex and virginity are awkward topics, even as teens but moreso at my age. I think the best thing would be to just go with the flow. If she senses my inexperience I'm sure she'll just chalk it up to it being OUR first time together. If she asks I'll just say it's been a while. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted December 5, 2014 Share Posted December 5, 2014 I would be unhappy if a guy straight-out lied to me during a conversation about it. But if I hadn't brought it up I won't blame him for not just blurting it out - it's a strange thing to say out of the blue. If a girl doesn't talk to you about your past, chances are it isn't that important to her. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ThaWholigan Posted December 5, 2014 Share Posted December 5, 2014 You don't necessarily have to say anything. Don't lie, of course, but chances are if she wants to f-ck you, she probably won't care that much if you're a virgin. If you're still feeling a bit anxious because of it, best advice I can give is learn as much about sex and women's bodies as you can, and more importantly, learn to focus on the moment and on her. Reading her cues and what she likes isn't as hard as it sounds. Communicate!! If you can learn to relax and be in the moment instead of in your head, where your mind will play tricks on you, you'll be fine . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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