cherie88 Posted December 6, 2014 Share Posted December 6, 2014 (edited) So I met an old friend at the subway, and he showed interest in me. Telling me how beautiful I looked. Brief story about this guy- hes like this amazing spoken word poet into social and world issues.. he looks amazing on the surface and is recognized by alot of people.. including women. Long story short he asked me out and admitted to me he always wanted to ask me out but didnt have the courage to. He made a home meal dinner for me at his place, and well things moved pretty fast and I ended up sleeping with him. He showed interest still, and would call me baby check up on me every know an then. Finally i seen him again, we did it again but noticed something perculiar that day.. i saw him staring at pictures of another girl but bthought nothing of it. You know the saying you "dig" for dirt and youll found it..well I found it. Found out later that hes been keeping in contact with her ... he went to his house for dinner theyve been talking every day. I will contact him but doesnt show interest in talking to me or checking on me like he use to. I know its only a month but it hurts. Was it just sex? just attraction? I feel like confronting him but im not the confrontational type. Also im not suppose to know this information I did some serious detective work. I stopped talking to him but i feel like he doesnt notice or care. Havent heard from him in a week and a half I thought about texting him but thats just asking for miscommunication.. should i just shrug my shoulders and move on or confront inthe fear of looking pathetic or immature...or should i just ask him what this was? Im so afraid. Im tryna protect my feelings:(:(:(:( Edited December 6, 2014 by cherie88 Link to post Share on other sites
SawtoothMars Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 So I met an old friend at the subway, and he showed interest in me. Telling me how beautiful I looked. Brief story about this guy- hes like this amazing spoken word poet into social and world issues.. he looks amazing on the surface and is recognized by alot of people.. including women. I thought about texting him but thats just asking for miscommunication.. should i just shrug my shoulders and move on or confront inthe fear of looking pathetic or immature...or should i just ask him what this was? Im so afraid. Im tryna protect my feelings:(:(:(:( I have never met a guy into poetry and "social+world issues" who isn't a complete idiot or toolbox. Most of them just use this crap to get laid. I'm sorry but Newt Gengrich knows and cares more about making the world a better place than most of these butthole social justice types. That comparison is like saying Hitler cares more about world peace! Advice for next time... when some guy waxes poetic about starving kids in africa... don't drop your panties for it. I have for decades believed Bono to be the most compassionate and intelligent man engaged in solving world issues. However I was still shocked when he said in 2013 that capitalism is the only thing that solves poverty. Most celebrities either don't have the guts or the brains to admit that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 Sorry, but he's a player with a textbook ploy. There were many signs this would be the outcome. A first date with no plans outside the guy's house for starters. He was too afraid to ask you out all this time? What suddenly changed? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RemainUnchanged Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 I have never met a guy into poetry and "social+world issues" who isn't a complete idiot or toolbox. Most of them just use this crap to get laid. kinda hard to believe it works.. OP, not trying to be a jerk or anything, but maybe you shouldn't sleep with someone within 24 hours of meeting them.. pretty groundbreaking, I know.. but just consider it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
winterlover42 Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 don't contact him anymore. i know it hurts now but you have to ignore him. don't give him the satisfaction 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 Sorry, OP, but seems it was just sex. Do not sleep with someone so soon after meeting them if you're looking for something more serious. I'm sorry you're hurting, but do not contact this guy again. He got what he wanted, unfortunately. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Javelin Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 (edited) Cherie, While harsh, blunt or however you want to take it - Ladyluck is 100% correct. However, don't think that you're the only one that is susceptible to this type of game, because this happens to people every day! Ditch his number, forget about closure, and chalk this up as a learning experience for your next encounter. Let me leave you with a little advice. As a woman, you really should make the guy earn you! A home made dinner on a first date is probably worthy of a hug; on that rare occasion where a guy blows your mind, perhaps a kiss! Just make sure that he is worthy of YOU, before going all the way in the future. And, don't play hard games! You are just as much responsible as earning him as well! Edited December 10, 2014 by Javelin 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 There was nothing stipulated about being "Offical" and since you jumped right into the sack with him, he just assumed it was nothing serious. You cannot "assume" that it's a committed relationship, or you set yourself up for disappointment. He's not a player, he didn't take advantage of you, you agreed to sleep with him, and there was no discussion of commitment....it is what it is. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 10, 2014 Share Posted December 10, 2014 Cherie, As a woman, you really should make the guy earn you! A home made dinner on a first date is probably worthy of a hug; on that rare occasion where a guy blows your mind, perhaps a kiss! Just make sure that he is worthy of YOU, before going all the way in the future. And, don't play hard games! You are just as much responsible as earning him as well! THIS 100% ^^^^^^^^^ TIP: keep your legs closed if you are hoping for a serious relationship and talk about expectations. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cherie88 Posted December 11, 2014 Author Share Posted December 11, 2014 I have never met a guy into poetry and "social+world issues" who isn't a complete idiot or toolbox. Most of them just use this crap to get laid. I'm sorry but Newt Gengrich knows and cares more about making the world a better place than most of these butthole social justice types. That comparison is like saying Hitler cares more about world peace! Advice for next time... when some guy waxes poetic about starving kids in africa... don't drop your panties for it. I have for decades believed Bono to be the most compassionate and intelligent man engaged in solving world issues. However I was still shocked when he said in 2013 that capitalism is the only thing that solves poverty. Most celebrities either don't have the guts or the brains to admit that. Very true I got so caught up in his image that I thought it was nearly impossible for him to be this way.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cherie88 Posted December 11, 2014 Author Share Posted December 11, 2014 Him calling me "Queen" and the fact he always writes poems on how to treat women , "how to be a man". I feel sick cause i fell for it.. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 11, 2014 Share Posted December 11, 2014 Him calling me "Queen" and the fact he always writes poems on how to treat women , "how to be a man". I feel sick cause i fell for it.. And now you heard from us older gals (well most of us are), the steps, actions, to be taken and red flags to watch for. Yes guys will do and say anything to get sex. This is why you need to slow down, take your time, and make them earn your worth like the other posted said. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cherie88 Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 Well decided to get it off my chest and let him know how i felt.. this situation was particularly annoying to me cause he always preaches about how to treat women and i had to let him know, i told him he led me on intentional or not and told him "he should use his own advice" for once I look back at our messages and him calling me babe, offering to care of me when i was ill.. goes a far long way for just wanting sex. In my opnion those charades were completely un necessary i would have had more respect for him if he just hit it and quit it after the first day, instead of playing all these mind games. He responded by saying "youre right im an *******, i never clarified anythig, im sorry for makng you feel like what we had wasnt special" Do you think hes genuine? or just trying to get me off his hair... In addition i know he was talking to another girl shortly after me... -The other day i bumped into him and he pretended he didnt see me, and i saw his roomate and he was acting quite strange aswell? What does this mean Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 My goodness it was one date and you are acting like you were his gf. Just because someone is nice to you and calls you babe doesn't mean they are leading you on. I imagine you got undressed and slept with him because you wanted sex to, is this correct? He didn't use you if anything you used each other to get off but you wanted a relationship to happen and it didn't. Stop snooping on him. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 -The other day i bumped into him and he pretended he didnt see me, and i saw his roomate and he was acting quite strange aswell? What does this mean Me thinks it means he's not interested. Link to post Share on other sites
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