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Road to Redemption


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Steph

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1 day ago #1

I have been talking to this guy for about 6 months. It is not the most traditional relationship we are in college after all but anyway we don't have any titles. But he is not the easiest person to talk to and we never had a conversation about where this was going. So about a month ago I started talking to this other guy because he was giving me the everyday conversation that my original guy (aka my boo) wasn't. Long story short I ended up sleeping with the new guy and he told his friends and it got back around to my boo. Now he is saying that I cheated when technically I didn't because we aren't together but I know if the roles were reversed I would feel the same way. So me and my boo did talk about it and he said he doesn't trust me any more which is understandable and that it is going to take a lot to move past this. But I just want to know what to do. I completely cut off the other guy even blocked him on my phone. I was completely honest with my boo so there are no more secrets between us on my part and I think we can work it out. I think he is going to work on forgiving me. But what advice can yall give to help me stay on his good sides and keep us moving forward? Also I was trying to think of things I can do jus to show him I care and that I am trying like going to dinner or something like that. I really like him and I guess I didn't really realize it until I almost lost him. I don't think it's love quite yet I'm only 20 and don't know the first thing about love but I do have love for him just not IN love with him. Anyway I did buy him a Christmas gift because we already discussed that prior to me telling him about the cheating but I want to do something now like this weekend. I told him I wanted to do something with him on Sunday because I'm off you know because for one I miss him and I really want to see him and two because I want to have another discussion about what we are doing now that he has had some time to think about things. Is that a good move? Please someone help. And by help I mean other than criticize me I know I was wrong in cheating and I accept that but please leave some ideas as well if you can't help but criticize.

Thanks!

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If you have no mutual interest with your "guy and you don't find him interesting person to talk to, why do you want to work things out with him?

 

Maybe what happened to you with the other guy is a sign for you that there were something missing in you R. A major one.

 

Now you're acting out of guilt and but you cannot build relationship based on guilt. Look at the mirror and try to find good reason why should you fight for your problematic R?

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Sleeping with the guy was a sign that you are not getting what you NEED out of your relationship with boo. You are 20, too young to understand that you are wasting your time with him. He's pretty much just your emotional sad sac. You are just feeling a bit of an emotional void right now, that is all, you don't really need him back. Once you start socializing and hanging out with others again, you will meet someone that gives you what you are looking for. This is just the start of a process of knowing what you want and need out of a relationship.

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