How to initiate NC

[nolanola]

I need some advice on how to start NC. In my case, I feel pretty strongly that us breaking up is really a matter of circumstances, although I know some people will say "he's just not that into you". For the past few weeks, I have held on to hope that we could stay friends and that once he was ready to pursue a serious relationship we could try again.

However, this is making me crazy. I still care about him a lot and when he calls I get sucked into thinking about him a lot and wishing that things could be different. I think I need to go NC and focus on moving on in my life as it could be a long time (or never) before he is ready.

My biggest struggle is in how to do this. As you can see, we are still talking. For the first few weeks, he was initiating most of the contact, then I texted/called him a few times. After my last call about 10 days ago, I decided not to call again and waited to see if he would reach out. He called earlier this week and we had a good conversation (he mentioned thinking about me during the week, seemed jealous when I mentioned another guy). After not hearing from him all week, I got mopey and sad and sent him a text on Friday. He didn't respond until today, which is a long time for him and it was nice, but kind of distant. I have not replied.

I know I need to go NC for a couple of reasons :

1. I need to get distance to move on/ stop thinking about him all the time

2. I can't deny that I want him to miss me and want me back

 

So I have a few options. I can wait until he calls again and talk to him, telling him that I need some space to sort things out, etc, etc (if anyone has advice on how to say this, please let me know). I can do nothing and see if he ever contacts me again (contact from him has been declining recently). Or I can just ignore him if and when he calls.

The biggest thing is that I really do want to keep the door open at least a tiny crack because I am hopeful that if circumstances were to change we might be able to reconnect (we really get along very well and I know he likes -or liked?- me a lot). He is fairly recently divorced with 2 young sons and we are living at a distance from each other of 4 hours.

Any advice from people that have been there? We have been very civil up to now and I would hate for things to get weird or ugly.