elaine567 Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 Point is that anyone who uses that as some kind of benchmark is either delusional or ?? ...Its not about anything to do with reality.. TFY But unrealistic expectations ruin many lives. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
nofeelings22 Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 (edited) So... do you personally know them and see how much exercise they do/don't do? I was so happy to see this article and these models because their body types are pretty much like my own. (Probably on a taller scale though, I'm not 6 feet tall and 200, I'm much shorter and wear a size 12. But proportionally, they look like me.) I would never have had the confidence to have my picture taken like that, even when I was younger and slimmer than I am now. To see your disdainful comments and your assumption that they're unhealthy really hurts, nofeelings22. We zaftig ladies DO EXERCISE and we LIKE it! Sure I have off times, but I feel sluggish and yucky when I go for a few days without running around my neighborhood. It's frustrating when I work out regularly, eat only 1400 or so calories a day for long stretches, and my body still stubbornly holds on to that weight. Some of us have what's called an 'endomorphic' body type, so we cannot look like a Victoria's Secret model even after months, YEARS of dieting and exercise. Our bodies just don't GO that way. If these ladies were shown to men back in Victorian times or the 18th century, they would all agree without question that they are absolutely beautiful and healthy, with curves and the ability to have 'stores' to survive famine. Look at the art of those eras! It's only been the last 40-50 years in history that women with stick arms and ribcages showing have been the ideal of beauty. At least there are a few men who love us big girls, my husband being one of them. This is all true, as I said way, way back. There are lots of body types. You eat 1400 calories and work out. Therefore, you are in shape. As I also said before, you are striving to achieve an unrealistic goal for your body type (as do I) and THROUGH THE PROCESS of that struggle, you are in top shape, eating properly and getting exercise. You are also an outlier. Most larger people in the USA are not simply genetically going to be larger... they are junk food, fast food, sugar eating , lazy couch potatoes. As a comparison, the USA is made upof people with the same genetics as the rest of the world, we are all immigrants, for the most part. Yet look at the body mass of the rest of the people in the world. You see the naturally more large people, sure. Outliers. Maybe you share genetics with them. What you don't see elsewhere is the percentage of the population that is overweight for their own body type. Only here do we have the level of horribly out of shape people. And this is my outrage... you are, right now, eating 1400 calories and exercising. This is great. You are trying to achieve the unachievable for your body type and through the effort, are in top shape. If society moves the bar, imagine they choose a hugely fat person as the new standard of beauty. You will then throw out the 1400 calories and work outs. This is what's wrong with changing the bar. And let's reverse it all now. I'm naturally too skinny. I have to bust my ass eating more than is comfortable, guzzling protein shakes and lifting weights. I see Vin Diesel, Hugh Jackman, etc... These guys have a different body type than I do, but through trying to get there, to the ideal man's shape, as determined by society, I stay in better shape and improve. If women suddenly decided Bill Gates was male perfection, I wouldn't have to do a thing. Do i bitch and moan about it? No. I do my best to get in the best shape I can for my body type and it works. I have no shortage of dates and hookups. I'm not going to be huge, but I'm in perfect shape for my body type. But.... the key here is you know your body type.. Don't internalize my complaint about glorifying fat (lazy) people who are there though self neglect as having anything to do with ypu, personally. In fact, I had you in mind when ranting. Where the bar is set now gives you motivation, where less motivation would exist if we changed the bar. Make sense? There is one last thing I'd like to add about Victorian paintings. You aren't going far enough back. Throughout humanity's existence, we did not have the luxury to get fat. It was a status symbol back then showing you had excess. How many fat monkeys or Chimps do you see? None. We did not evolve to eat the calories we eat while sitting in an office doing nothing. And the office job is even WORSE than moving the bar of body types. I won't start that rant. Edited December 21, 2014 by nofeelings22 2 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 This is all true, as I said way, way back. There are lots of body types. You eat 1400 calories and work out. Therefore, you are in shape. As I also said before, you are striving to achieve an unrealistic goal for your body type (as do I) and THROUGH THE PROCESS of that struggle, you are in top shape, eating properly and getting exercise. You are also an outlier. Most larger people in the USA are not simply genetically going to be larger... they are junk food, fast food, sugar eating , lazy couch potatoes. As a comparison, the USA is made upof people with the same genetics as the rest of the world, we are all immigrants, for the most part. Yet look at the body mass of the rest of the people in the world. You see the naturally more large people, sure. Outliers. Maybe you share genetics with them. What you don't see elsewhere is the percentage of the population that is overweight for their own body type. Only here do we have the level of horribly out of shape people. And this is my outrage... you are, right now, eating 1400 calories and exercising. This is great. You are trying to achieve the unachievable for your body type and through the effort, are in top shape. If society moves the bar, imagine they choose a hugely fat person as the new standard of beauty. You will then throw out the 1400 calories and work outs. This is what's wrong with changing the bar. And let's reverse it all now. I'm naturally too skinny. I have to bust my ass eating more than is comfortable, guzzling protein shakes and lifting weights. I see Vin Diesel, Hugh Jackman, etc... These guys have a different body type than I do, but through trying to get there, to the ideal man's shape, as determined by society, I stay in better shape and improve. If women suddenly decided Bill Gates was male perfection, I wouldn't have to do a thing. Do i bitch and moan about it? No. I do my best to get in the best shape I can for my body type and it works. I have no shortage of dates and hookups. I'm not going to be huge, but I'm in perfect shape for my body type. But.... the key here is you know your body type.. Don't internalize my complaint about glorifying fat (lazy) people who are there though self neglect as having anything to do with ypu, personally. In fact, I had you in mind when ranting. Where the bar is set now gives you motivation, where less motivation would exist if we changed the bar. Make sense? All very well but you called those model pics "Absolutely disgusting." and you don't know what diet or exercise regime those models are on, nor what body shape they are capable of. So whilst you are trying to sweet talk Bebe23, by telling her she is in "top shape" the fact remains you find that body shape "disgusting" and that probably says more about you than anyone else. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 If society moves the bar, imagine they choose a hugely fat person as the new standard of beauty. You will then throw out the 1400 calories and work outs. This is what's wrong with changing the bar. This is exactly why the "health at every size" movement has hash tags like #Fyourbeautystandards. The idea is to THROW OUT the beauty standards by showing beauty at different sizes, shapes, skin tones, etc--not to make thin women feel unattractive by selecting a new standard. You worry about the bar being moved. They are trying to get rid of the bar altogether. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
nofeelings22 Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 All very well but you called those model pics "Absolutely disgusting." and you don't know what diet or exercise regime those models are on, nor what body shape they are capable of. So whilst you are trying to sweet talk Bebe23, by telling her she is in "top shape" the fact remains you find that body shape "disgusting" and that probably says more about you than anyone else. That is absolutely disgusting. It's a totally disgusting thing to do. Either I wrote it incorrectly, or you read it wrong. It's totally disgusting to set the bar at that level. Go back and read my posts. Link to post Share on other sites
nofeelings22 Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 This is exactly why the "health at every size" movement has hash tags like #Fyourbeautystandards. The idea is to THROW OUT the beauty standards by showing beauty at different sizes, shapes, skin tones, etc--not to make thin women feel unattractive by selecting a new standard. You worry about the bar being moved. They are trying to get rid of the bar altogether. You guys (women) have a very different sense of beauty than men. You have us men's opinions to deal with, but you also criticize yourselves and rank and judge each other. The bar may be fully erased, and that is great. But what are you actually trying to achieve? Just to feel better? It will only help half way to change what women find attractive about themselves. There is still the attracting the other sex part. Put very, very bluntly, there is nothing you can do to change what gives guys sexual arousal. Just as there is nothing we can do to change what gives women rhe same. It's a very complicated situation, coming at you from both sexes. In some ways, I guess it matters whose opinion of beauty you find you are trying to change. Women's? Sure. you can change that, since it's intellectual. Men's? Not a chance. A million years of evolution isn't going to change just because we want it to. m Successful Porn stars and strippers have the bodies they do because this is what the majority of guys are turned on by. We can change the women's opinion of what's sexy, but you can't change men's evolutionary preferences. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
HazyCosmicJive Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 So promised a man in the early 1960s I presume. Since then it it has become far more common for women to either be self supporting or more reliant on the state (funded by working men and women) and to stop being so reliant on individual men. Now the average woman is bigger than she was in the 1960s. So it seems as though the deal you propose has already been done. Then don't be surprised when men start ignoring you. Fifty years of feminism and the welfare state isn't going to change millions of years of evolution. Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 That is absolutely disgusting. It's a totally disgusting thing to do. Either I wrote it incorrectly, or you read it wrong. It's totally disgusting to set the bar at that level. Go back and read my posts. I just did the calculations. At my current activity level, I need 2500 calories a day and my BMR is 1700. What is disgusting is encouraging people to eat 1400 calories per day while working out regularly. What's even more disgusting is encouraging people to go on crash diets 1000 calories for day and claim it's healthy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 You guys (women) have a very different sense of beauty than men. You have us men's opinions to deal with, but you also criticize yourselves and rank and judge each other. The bar may be fully erased, and that is great. But what are you actually trying to achieve? Just to feel better? It will only help half way to change what women find attractive about themselves. There is still the attracting the other sex part. Put very, very bluntly, there is nothing you can do to change what gives guys sexual arousal. Just as there is nothing we can do to change what gives women rhe same. It's a very complicated situation, coming at you from both sexes. In some ways, I guess it matters whose opinion of beauty you find you are trying to change. Women's? Sure. you can change that, since it's intellectual. Men's? Not a chance. A million years of evolution isn't going to change just because we want it to. m Successful Porn stars and strippers have the bodies they do because this is what the majority of guys are turned on by. We can change the women's opinion of what's sexy, but you can't change men's evolutionary preferences. Again, the point is to put HEALTH as the goal, rather than men's opinions, women's opinions, or the opinion of the beauty, fashion, or porn industries. Women who put HEALTH first will have better outcomes long term. Throw out the beauty standards, and replace them with health standards. Form follows function, but healthy form won't necessarily align with any beauty standards. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
HazyCosmicJive Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 You guys (women) have a very different sense of beauty than men. You have us men's opinions to deal with, but you also criticize yourselves and rank and judge each other. The bar may be fully erased, and that is great. But what are you actually trying to achieve? Just to feel better? It will only help half way to change what women find attractive about themselves. There is still the attracting the other sex part. Put very, very bluntly, there is nothing you can do to change what gives guys sexual arousal. Just as there is nothing we can do to change what gives women rhe same. It's a very complicated situation, coming at you from both sexes. In some ways, I guess it matters whose opinion of beauty you find you are trying to change. Women's? Sure. you can change that, since it's intellectual. Men's? Not a chance. A million years of evolution isn't going to change just because we want it to. m Successful Porn stars and strippers have the bodies they do because this is what the majority of guys are turned on by. We can change the women's opinion of what's sexy, but you can't change men's evolutionary preferences. So true. The media try to dictate to men what we should consider attractive, yet those who are honest will admit that it's not going to change just because some portly feminists want it to. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
nofeelings22 Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 (edited) I just did the calculations. At my current activity level, I need 2500 calories a day and my BMR is 1700. What is disgusting is encouraging people to eat 1400 calories per day while working out regularly. What's even more disgusting is encouraging people to go on crash diets 1000 calories for day and claim it's healthy. Are you serious?? You don't need that much intake! That's a very active, athletc man's calorie intake. You are way over eating. How Many Calories Should You Eat? Based on Gender, Age, and Activity Level No wonder you are struggling. Cut way back. And what are you eating? Exactly? Sugars? White breads? Etc? Not all calories are made the same. Some will make you feel more full while introducing needed nutrients, making you less hungry in the long run. I didn't see anyone here suggesting crash diets are healthy. They are most definitely not. You're making a lot of stuff up. You're very angry and on the attack, as always. True healthy eating is about changing your taste and your daily routines to achieve health, not about crash diets. It has to be a permanent change in your habits. Edited December 21, 2014 by nofeelings22 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HazyCosmicJive Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 Are you serious?? You don't need that much intake! That's a very active, athletc man's calorie intake. You are way over eating. How Many Calories Should You Eat? Based on Gender, Age, and Activity Level No wonder you are struggling. Cut way back. And what are you eating? Exactly? Sugars? White breads? Etc? Not all calories are made the same. Some will make you feel more full while introducing needed nutrients, making you less hungry in the long run. I didn't see anyone here suggesting crash diets are healthy. They are most definitely not. You're making a lot of stuff up. You're very angry and on the attack, as always. True healthy eating is about changing your taste and your daily routines to achieve health, not about crash diets. It has to be a permanent change in your habits. Avoid sugar, lift weights and control your portions. And sometimes you will be hungry - deal with it. That's how I do it. It's a very simple mathematical equation: calories in minus calories out. Some people just don't have the self-control or the perseverance to maintain a healthy weight. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 Are you serious?? You don't need that much intake! That's a very active, athletc man's calorie intake. You are way over eating. You assume this with no idea of how much muscle she has, how strong she is, and what she can do with her body. I fit the "standards" nicely: thin and toned. And I work out regularly (running mostly). But the women who are stronger than me are almost always much bigger than me. If I wanted to get stronger, I'd have to eat a LOT more, and I'd have to gain weight (muscle and fat). And I already eat plenty! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HazyCosmicJive Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 You assume this with no idea of how much muscle she has, how strong she is, and what she can do with her body. I fit the "standards" nicely: thin and toned. And I work out regularly (running mostly). But the women who are stronger than me are almost always much bigger than me. If I wanted to get stronger, I'd have to eat a LOT more, and I'd have to gain weight (muscle and fat). And I already eat plenty! The only standard that should matter is the mirror. Everyone's body is different and you can't just apply a simple equation to it. Therefore, I agree. Link to post Share on other sites
nofeelings22 Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 You assume this with no idea of how much muscle she has, how strong she is, and what she can do with her body. I fit the "standards" nicely: thin and toned. And I work out regularly (running mostly). But the women who are stronger than me are almost always much bigger than me. If I wanted to get stronger, I'd have to eat a LOT more, and I'd have to gain weight (muscle and fat). And I already eat plenty! Her caloric intake is way, way too high if she doesn't want excess mass. Simple fact. Click the link in my post. As you just said, you eat more to gain mass. You eat less to lose it. She is eating a very active man's level of calories. She'll be big from doing that no matter what she's doing for exercise. This is very simple stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 But unrealistic expectations ruin many lives. If "unrealistic expectations" ruin people's lives then I really feel sorry for those people...Unrealistic expectations exist in every aspect of life...Career, money, looks, blah, blah.... Anyone who cant see beyond that is just doomed to a life of regret and let down...To ask society to "change" to suit those sorry souls is just ridiculous.. TFY 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author TigerLilly78 Posted December 21, 2014 Author Share Posted December 21, 2014 Everybody has their preferences and that's great but to claim it is about health is laughable at best. Let's face it, this is about what sexually turns people on not how their lungs and kidneys function. If health is such a concern, I assume you date people who never drink alcohol, sodas, coffee, have never smoked cigarettes or weed, have a 100% organic vegan diet and don't use any products containing chemicals on either themselves or in their home? Come on. This isn't about health, it's about sexual preference. Own that. Haven't checked back in a few days and im really shocked this thread took off the way it did! This post is excellent and exactly what I say about the matter its not a genuine concern for the "health issues" of random strangers its the fact that they do not find over weight people visually appealing and that fact in itself is fine. Like I said in one of my opening posts no ones forcing anyone to date them but when you take it to the next level and start fat shaming or being disrespectful then thats on them to own the fact they are shallow rude people simple as that im sorry if that offends anyone. I think thats more what the fat acceptance movement is about its not about "glamorizing" being overweight its about basic respect something that has been lacking for a long time when it comes to over weight people. We know were overweight we don't need it thrown in our faces every ten mins when and if were ready we will lose the weight in the mean time if you don't like me fine but I will not tolerate being disrespected for the simple fact some one doesn't find me visually appealing cause thats their issues not mine.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 Haven't checked back in a few days and im really shocked this thread took off the way it did! This post is excellent and exactly what I say about the matter its not a genuine concern for the "health issues" of random strangers its the fact that they do not find over weight people visually appealing and that fact in itself is fine. Like I said in one of my opening posts no ones forcing anyone to date them but when you take it to the next level and start fat shaming or being disrespectful then thats on them to own the fact they are shallow rude people simple as that im sorry if that offends anyone. I think thats more what the fat acceptance movement is about its not about "glamorizing" being overweight its about basic respect something that has been lacking for a long time when it comes to over weight people. We know were overweight we don't need it thrown in our faces every ten mins when and if were ready we will lose the weight in the mean time if you don't like me fine but I will not tolerate being disrespected for the simple fact some one doesn't find me visually appealing cause thats their issues not mine.. Ok, great... Should we start a "Short guys accepance"movement? Or a "Dumbass acceptance movement"?..or a "Limpdick acceptance movement"??... Where does it end?? TFY 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Taramere Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 Then don't be surprised when men start ignoring you. Fifty years of feminism and the welfare state isn't going to change millions of years of evolution. Actually I'm in my healthy weight range, and I often find that I've been ignored in favour of a friend who's a bit overweight. They (the men) will make commentary about liking something to grab onto. So perhaps your notions that your own personal preferences are universal amongst men are faulty. A lot of men do in fact prefer women who have "a bit more meat on them." I suspect they often feel more comfortable with less than slim women. What men REALLY want is a brown-haired, blue-eyed size 14 woman | Daily Mail Online Then there are those parts of the world mentioned by Elswyth where women have to be fattened up to a downright obese state for marriage. So it doesn't seem as though your insistence on women being fit and slender is by any means universal. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author TigerLilly78 Posted December 21, 2014 Author Share Posted December 21, 2014 Ok, great... Should we start a "Short guys accepance"movement? Or a "Dumbass acceptance movement"?..or a "Limpdick acceptance movement"??... Where does it end?? TFY Really have you seen people be as openly abusive towards short men? when was the last time you saw a short man called "disgusting"? the rest of your examples are just silly so im not going to adress them no most would just say "I dont care for dating a shorter guy" and be done with it thats the difference it ends when the same happens for over weight people..its the shaming and abuse that needs to stop..and stuff like that only stops when people stand up and say enough.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
HazyCosmicJive Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 Really have you seen people be as openly abusive towards short men? when was the last time you saw a short man called "disgusting"? the rest of your examples are just silly so im not going to adress them no most would just say "I dont care for dating a shorter guy" and be done with it thats the difference it ends when the same happens for over weight people..its the shaming and abuse that needs to stop..and stuff like that only stops when people stand up and say enough.. I don't think it's comparable. A short guy can't help being short. Being overweight is, at least to an extent, a choice. Women are pretty brutal about rejecting short guys, yet get upset if they're rejected for being overweight. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
HazyCosmicJive Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 Actually I'm in my healthy weight range, and I often find that I've been ignored in favour of a friend who's a bit overweight. They (the men) will make commentary about liking something to grab onto. So perhaps your notions that your own personal preferences are universal amongst men are faulty. A lot of men do in fact prefer women who have "a bit more meat on them." I suspect they often feel more comfortable with less than slim women. What men REALLY want is a brown-haired, blue-eyed size 14 woman | Daily Mail Online Then there are those parts of the world mentioned by Elswyth where women have to be fattened up to a downright obese state for marriage. So it doesn't seem as though your insistence on women being fit and slender is by any means universal. LOL, that woman in the picture is NOT overweight. She looks like she's got a bit of muscle on her, but that's not the same as fat. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 LOL, that woman in the picture is NOT overweight. She looks like she's got a bit of muscle on her, but that's not the same as fat. Read the text don't just look at the pictures. Link to post Share on other sites
Taramere Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 (edited) LOL, that woman in the picture is NOT overweight. She looks like she's got a bit of muscle on her, but that's not the same as fat. That's not muscle, it's excess fat. No doubt combined with some muscle - but a gym nut does not look like that. Their arms are harder looking, even when their muscles are relaxed. Her name's Lauren Goodger (a reality tv star). I checked stats. She's 5 f ft 5" and a reported 155 pounds - and apparently does report having struggles with her weight. 5 ft 4" and 155 pounds isn't seriously overweight, but applying objective standards (medical recommendations) it's a little above medically recommended rates - and while she's a pretty girl, she can't really be classed as slender in that picture. Edited December 21, 2014 by Taramere Link to post Share on other sites
Maleficent Posted December 21, 2014 Share Posted December 21, 2014 Are you serious?? You don't need that much intake! That's a very active, athletc man's calorie intake. You are way over eating. How Many Calories Should You Eat? Based on Gender, Age, and Activity Level No wonder you are struggling. Cut way back. And what are you eating? Exactly? Sugars? White breads? Etc? Not all calories are made the same. Some will make you feel more full while introducing needed nutrients, making you less hungry in the long run. I didn't see anyone here suggesting crash diets are healthy. They are most definitely not. You're making a lot of stuff up. You're very angry and on the attack, as always. True healthy eating is about changing your taste and your daily routines to achieve health, not about crash diets. It has to be a permanent change in your habits. Exactly where did I mention I was personally struggling to maintain my weight? What I did mention in this thread was that I was usually doing 10 hours of moderate to intense physical activity per week. You say I am angry yet it's the second time you personally attack me on this very thread after all I did was post a general opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
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