Sexual harassment

[turnerik]

My boss has been saying some pretty disgusting things at work over the past few months. I feel like he is trying to be one of the guys instead of our boss so he says these things. I'm a straight guy and so is he. A few months back he called me his overtime whore. He told me he always stares at my crotch to see if my fly is open. This past week he went out on the road with me. He started singing good morning erik how was your night, mine was wonderful with you by my side. He then called me his sexy work horse. He also started singing erik you spend my wiener right round right round. He has walked up to guys and given the, titty twisters and walks up to another employee and says you make me want to be sexier! I'm not sure what to do. I feel like I should tell hr, but its a chain company and I have heard other complaints have went been recievied without an investigation. Do I tell my branches HR or the company HR or should I tell at all?

[CarrieT]

Start a journal with every comment, date and time - and report to both.

[Gloria25]

Don't tell the company and/or HR, they work for the company - not you or EEO laws.

 

Get an attorney and start finding out how/what evidence you need to start gathering.

 

See, people naively think they can just speak to HR and/or file a complaint and the EEOC will do their job - NOT.

 

Also, you'll be surprised on how complex the law can get. You just don't file a simple "complaint" and you're protected. There's certain ways to present your case that average Joe/Janes don't understand.

 

Better to have an attorney be guiding you before you even file a complaint. They know how to draft stuff, cuz trust me, you don't draft that complaint right and everything will fall like a house of cards.

[gaius]

He doesn't sound straight. There's always the chance you complain and he doesn't get fired, which leaves a boss that has a grudge against you. Which would be horrible for your career. You really can't just brush off the occasional rantings of some closet queen?

[todreaminblue]

have you talked to the guy and told him he makes you uncomfortable and that you wish him to stop.....what do you say when he does this.........deb

[d0nnivain]

You need to start taking care of yourself & creating some evidence.

 

 

Get a note book or open a new screen on your HOME computer. Make a record of the things being said with dates time & witnesses.

 

 

Next in private tell your boss that the things he is saying are inappropriate & that he needs to stop.

 

 

In your notebook jot down the date & time of that conversation.

 

 

If he does it again, write him a letter & transmit it to him multiple ways: e-mail, a letter on his desk & via US post office. In the letter document past indiscretions & the verbal chat you had when you asked him to stop. Tell him that if he does it again, a copy of this letter will be going to HR.

 

 

Meanwhile you start looking for a new job. Leaving is the easier course.

 

 

If you can't get a new job & your boss crosses the line after receiving your letter you bring a copy of that letter documenting everything to HR. If you do straight to HR they will ignore you because you don't have enough evidence & they may think you are simply whining.

 

 

Also talk to a local lawyer. Right now you don't have a lawsuit but you do want to make sure you protect yourself as best as possible.

[Gloria25]

You need to start taking care of yourself & creating some evidence.

 

 

Get a note book or open a new screen on your HOME computer. Make a record of the things being said with dates time & witnesses.

 

 

Next in private tell your boss that the things he is saying are inappropriate & that he needs to stop.

 

 

In your notebook jot down the date & time of that conversation.

 

 

If he does it again, write him a letter & transmit it to him multiple ways: e-mail, a letter on his desk & via US post office. In the letter document past indiscretions & the verbal chat you had when you asked him to stop. Tell him that if he does it again, a copy of this letter will be going to HR.

 

 

Meanwhile you start looking for a new job. Leaving is the easier course.

 

 

If you can't get a new job & your boss crosses the line after receiving your letter you bring a copy of that letter documenting everything to HR. If you do straight to HR they will ignore you because you don't have enough evidence & they may think you are simply whining.

 

 

Also talk to a local lawyer. Right now you don't have a lawsuit but you do want to make sure you protect yourself as best as possible.

 

Ok, lemme say this again DON'T say anything to this guy, anyone you work with, HR, management, the company, EEO/EEOC, NO ONE.

 

See a lawyer first.

 

The lawyer will tell you whether or not you have a case. Trust me, the conduct has to be pervasive enough and fall within the law to be an "offense". Also, the person has a right to be put on notice and given a chance to stop the behavior.

 

Also, the way the complaint is drafted is important, cuz that will be the base/basis of a lot of things if it escalates. There are also certain timeframes and steps that must be taken to handle this. A lawyer knows.

 

You wanna evaluate the risks and make an informed decision on how to proceed with this. It's not as simple as it looks.

 

Like gaius said, after talking to the lawyer, you may not even have a case. You might just have to gather evidence and sit back and wait. Don't risk your career/job over this.

[d0nnivain]

The law says the conduct must be severe or pervasive, continue after you asked it to stop and that you suffered an adverse employment consequence as a result of the actions. With an economic impact you have no claim.

 

 

If you want it to stop, tell him to stop.

[Gloria25]

The law says the conduct must be severe or pervasive, continue after you asked it to stop and that you suffered an adverse employment consequence as a result of the actions. With an economic impact you have no claim.

 

 

If you want it to stop, tell him to stop.

 

Again, don't tell him or anyone ANYTHING until you have consulted with an attorney.

 

Just trust me on this one.

 

Let your lawyer draft your initial complaint and/or advise you on how to put this guy on notice.

 

Again, the way you handle it from the beginning will affect the outcome if it escalates into a formal complaint, investigation, court case, etc. If you don't properly do certain things, your case will fall apart.

Edited December 22, 2014 by Gloria25

[CC12]

OP, if you have enough spare money to throw it at an attorney, then go right ahead. I'm not sure what an attorney would do at this point, though? What "case" would be presented to them? The employer hasn't done anything wrong because they presumably have no knowledge of anything inappropriate going on. It's just one guy being a douche. I guess you could maybe pay a lawyer a few hundred bucks to write a letter to HR? That's something you can do on your own, though.

 

Yes, it's true that HR works for the company, and they'll cover their own asses before they'll cover yours. But if one of their employees is sexually harassing a subordinate, they will (theoretically) make him stop or fire him because that is the exact thing that covers their own asses.

 

Document all the inappropriate things he says and then complain to his superiors/HR. Also keep records of all communications regarding this issue. If things escalate or if you feel there is any sort of retaliation after you complain, then you can think about getting some legal help.

Edited December 22, 2014 by CC12