WomenWubber Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 Using a dating site to make new friends. Lmfao. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 Let's not jump to conclusions here. He could really be looking for friends, I've seen it before on tinder. Trust him until he gives you a reason not too. I agree... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Bellaisa Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 Call me crazy, but he could just be looking for a friend or two! He did tell you that he is new in town, and online dating sites are an easy way to find people in the area. Yeah, maybe he's open to something - but why not take his word for it unless he proves you otherwise? Other people's beliefs are not necessarily truths. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Trenton100 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 So, I met up with this guy on okcupid for drinks. He told me that he just moved to the city and he said that he was looking to meet new people and make some new friends. It was ok, I decided to leave early, because I was already getting tipsy and had to drive home and was done drinking, however since he walked and lived close to the bar, he decided to stay there. On his profile it said he was looking for just friends. There basically nothing romantic or flirtatious about our meeting. Either he was really looking for new friends or I just wasn't what he wanted? Think about this for a minute. With all of the avenues to find new friends, he joins a DATING SITE. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Trenton100 Posted December 22, 2014 Share Posted December 22, 2014 Using a dating site to make new friends. Lmfao. This should have ended the thread. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author spanishchick00 Posted December 22, 2014 Author Share Posted December 22, 2014 Who knows, why the heck he was on there anyway. We met up, and he didn't give me a handshake or anything. Odd. But I probably won't hear from him again. Link to post Share on other sites
mysteryscape Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 So f**k me, I was willing to play by the rules and just enjoy a woman's company without the expectations or pressure for more...but the rules changed on me, without my knowledge. Of course, this was before I completely understood what was going on here, but now I get it. So, what was going on here, what is it that you now get? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mysteryscape Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 a woman who has some kind of relationship with a man, she thinks it is not going to last, while she is with him, she is seeing other men as "friends." I think what this means is she wants a harem of guys who will not try to push the physical boundary until she finds that she wants a new guy. Then she will try to have her pick of one from her pack. What do others think of this theory? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 "New friends" just means he is looking for women he can have sex with without getting into a relationship. Yeah, it's code for 'looking for friends with benefits" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
cactusgal Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 i created a profile on a dating website when i moved to my new town. (it seemed like a good way to meet new people outside of work.) i specified that i was looking for friendship only. i meant it. and i was willing to meet, hang out with, and do touristy things with both sexes (i am straight). i ended up taking my profile down very quickly because no one believed that i was looking for friendship only. every guy i met up with acted like he was dating me. i found myself having to reject people i actually wanted to get to know AS FRIENDS. so, yes, the guy was probably telling the truth in his profile. Why in the name of God would you go on a dating site to meet friends? And then act all surprised when they want more than friendship? Are you kidding? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ascendotum Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 So, what was going on here, what is it that you now get? The same as before, its just that now he now gets it (realizes) the women aren't really looking for platonic friends, but are looking for new lover or bf, but saying they are not so they can play it either way depending on how attracted they are to the guy. They get to try a safe no expectations of sex from them approach to finding a new guy, and probably hope to deter the players. The thing is though I know an OLD player who knows the score from past experience and goes for the friends only women. Probably lots of guys will take on the bait & switch. Some will flip it back on her and baulk at a relationship and throw it back in her face how neither of them are out for a relationship. The less desirable guys will just stay as friends or more likely she will fade away after the first couple of dates and hope the guy takes the hint, and in many cases I'm sure they will as they aren't getting anything out of it. I've seen a few adds from women looking just for friends were she prefers the guy friend be tall or well built. lol It would not surprise me if guys looking for friends only, specify slim/fit women only for friends. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mariafishman Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 From my point of view, I say that most of the guys use dating and chatting sites just for the SEX purpose. I'm saying this from my experience. Whenever I do online text chatting, I get so many private ping and requests for sex request. Nobody is here for any serious relationship, just only for intimate pleasure and hot fun. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Vaine_L Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 I would say that guys don't use dating sites to find new friends. The only purpose they have in mind is to find someone for nsa fun. My buddy dated a russian girl he met on a web site. But that was a niche website to get married. I think that if you want to make friends - go to some place new and chat with someone... real life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Diezel Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 ANYONE, regardless of gender, using a dating website as a means to make friends, is either an idiot, a liar, or needs to be banned from the internet. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 But I'm confused! YOU went out with a guy who said he was just looking for friends on his profile, so were YOU just looking for a new friend yourself? Or else why did you meet this guy?? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 So, I met up with this guy on okcupid for drinks. He told me that he just moved to the city and he said that he was looking to meet new people and make some new friends. It was ok, I decided to leave early, because I was already getting tipsy and had to drive home and was done drinking, however since he walked and lived close to the bar, he decided to stay there. On his profile it said he was looking for just friends. There basically nothing romantic or flirtatious about our meeting. Either he was really looking for new friends or I just wasn't what he wanted? Seems to me MeetUps would be a far better way of meeting friends than using a dating site. Very few people join dating sites just to find friends. They usually join dating sites to find someone to date. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 a woman who has some kind of relationship with a man, she thinks it is not going to last, while she is with him, she is seeing other men as "friends." I think what this means is she wants a harem of guys who will not try to push the physical boundary until she finds that she wants a new guy. Then she will try to have her pick of one from her pack. What do others think of this theory? I see nothing wrong with it as long as she's upfront about what it is she's doing. As long as there is no commitment to anyone, and the guys are all willing to date her, she's free to date whoever she wants to date. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mysteryscape Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 I see nothing wrong with it as long as she's upfront about what it is she's doing. As long as there is no commitment to anyone, and the guys are all willing to date her, she's free to date whoever she wants to date. So I take it you think my theory of her motivation is correct. She's not looking for "friends" so much as a lineup of pliant potential boyfriends. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 So I take it you think my theory of her motivation is correct. She's not looking for "friends" so much as a lineup of pliant potential boyfriends. If the guy(s) don't want to be there, they won't be there. They're all grown. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mysteryscape Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 If the guy(s) don't want to be there, they won't be there. They're all grown. Maybe, but that's not what I asked. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 Maybe, but that's not what I asked. Be that as it may, I'm not going to run her down just because she has a string of guys who are willing to stand in line for her attention. They're all grown and are responsible for their own actions. So I guess the answer to your question is "No". 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mysteryscape Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 Be that as it may, I'm not going to run her down just because she has a string of guys who are willing to stand in line for her attention. They're all grown and are responsible for their own actions. So I guess the answer to your question is "No". I think what you're really saying is that the answer to my question is "Yes." I'm not trying to run anyone down, and I agree that if they're all on the same page, there is no reason to object too much. I'm just wondering what her real motivation would be. I think you've answered that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SomeDude16 Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 I'll add sometimes I do indeed use sites such as tinder to find fitness. Not friends as in let's go chill on my couch and watch football but to find a new texting buddy. Texting the same people gets old after a while. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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