If your boyfriend did this, would you break up with him?

[nadine5]

Dating 7 months.

 

I am a bit of a hacker, so I have no problem getting into his Facebook account. I shouldn't, but I do.

 

Two months ago, asked a girl "friend" for "pics". I confronted him, flipped out, we had a huge fight. This girl FRIEND has a history with him (and if you see my other unfortunate posts you will see my other issues with her). He changed his PW and told me they were pics from a movie he wanted to see.

 

Well, couldn't help myself. Got in that FB account again tonight.

 

Two days after the fight, he again asked her for pics. She sent him some nasty pics of her slutty self in some skanky outfits, and he proceeded to tell her how hot they were, blah blah, asked her for more..then got offended that she didn't respond to him right away.

 

Since then, he got in a fight with her and has unfriended her.

 

How can I confront this without telling him I hacked into his FB again?? He is always claiming what an ANGEL he is and how he would NEVER ask her for skanky pics.

[d0nnivain]

I'd break up with you for hacking my FB account.

 

 

You don't trust him. He does stuff behind your back that he knows will upset you.

 

 

You two don't have much of a relationship.

[mammasita]

Why do you even need to confront him? Leave his ass and be done.

 

Bottom line, if you need to snoop you have no business being with him....period.

 

Find someone you can trust and don't have to babysit.

[ExpatInItaly]

Yes, I would break up with him. No need to confront. You can admit what you did if you want, as you need to end the relationship anyway. He's not committed to you.

[KatZee]

Honestly, you should have ended it the first time you had to hack into his account.

 

You don't trust him. For whatever reason that its, there's no trust. If there's no trust, there is also no relationship.

 

Furthermore, you need to learn the definition of "boundaries." I'm not sure who you think you are to think you are in the right, or have the right for that matter, to be have unlimited access to someone else's property. You don't.

 

If you're insecure, and you have issues within yourself, that is YOUR PROBLEM, and that is your problem that needs to be addressed within yourself. You can't just go around hacking people's facebooks, emails, phones, or whatever else you get your hands on, to ease your own insecurities and doubts.

 

That being said, if someone is lying right to your face, and doing things to you, then you END IT. You don't just stay in a relationship and continue to hack and snoop in order to keep tabs on them. That's dysfunctional and unhealthy.

 

Obviously, your boyfriend has no respect for you if he's going around asking for dirty pictures from other girls. You know this. And you WILLINGLY remain with him. It's your own choice to stay, and your own fault continuing to be played, and hurt by this guy.

[Diezel]

You obviously have trust issues, he obviously has boundary issues.

 

Isn't it easier to just break up with him?

Also, I'd break up with you if you ever did that to me, regardless of whatever I did. If you can't trust someone, don't be with them. But don't invade their privacy either regardless of suspicion.

[Lernaean_Hydra]

Break up with him. First of all, when/if anyone reaches the point where they feel like they have to hack into their partner's social media accounts it's beyond time to end it. And I'm speaking from experience.

 

The fact that you did this, confronted him and a mere TWO DAYS later he was back at it again shows his lack of respect for you and the relationship. Just next him. The sleuthing, arguments and lies really aren't worth it.

[No Limit]

Instant breakup.

[yokaze]

You, madam have broken into a home only to find stolen goods. Can't go protecting yourself for hacking your man. People above are correct; there's no trust. Disengage.

 

But let me ask, why in the world would you want some dude who is clearly making advances toward another gal? Take inventory of yourself, start listing why YOU are tops and why YOU deserve the man YOU want. Do that and I think that guy will appear. Stay confident... Maybe this is the breakup that will finally show you WHO you want, not WHAT you want.

 

Oh, and change your own FB PW, just in case.....

 

Remain True,

 

DP

[TabbyHearts]

how the hell do you hack into his accounts? Just keep guessing his password?

[road]

Do not tell him what or how you found out. Just dump him.

[DrReplyInRhymes]

how the hell do you hack into his accounts? Just keep guessing his password?

 

The "art of hacking" is often the accumulation of knowledge,

Much more in depth than what you would learn at college,

Malicious software can be developed, but that takes quite a bit of work,

To access a simple facebook? Prob a keylogger or some other little quirk.

 

As far as this guy goes, he's obviously not who he says,

Actions don't meet words, and this trust is painfully dead.

I think it's quite unsavory you have to resort to such methods to see,

the trust is long gone, and you should leave each other be.

 

(PS - Uninstall the keylogger you have on his computer. That's rude.)

[writergal]

OP, break up with him. He left the relationship long before you logged into his FB account to see him cheating on you. If you confront him, he'll just lie as he has done so far. Why waste your time? Cut your losses now, and break up with him. If you stay entangled with this guy, you'll just bring more misery into your life. And life is short. Don't waste it on the wrong people.

[Satu]

The relationship is not working.

 

Fix it or forget it.