Blu72 Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 How do you cope during the holiday season? Do you hear from or get to see your AP during this time of year? Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 Wait until Easter....Christmas is a time to focus on your family. Italian proverb: "Natale con i tuoi, Pasqua con chi vuoi." (Christmas with your closest - Easter with whomever you want.) Focus on your family. You have a life, and so does your AP. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Blu72 Posted December 23, 2014 Author Share Posted December 23, 2014 For the most part we don't communicate much during the Xmas holiday because we understand we both are busy, plus my APs bday was the other day. So yeah it's a crazy busy time for both of us. I am just curious as to how it is for other people in the same situation. Link to post Share on other sites
goodyblue Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 For the most part we don't communicate much during the Xmas holiday because we understand we both are busy, plus my APs bday was the other day. So yeah it's a crazy busy time for both of us. I am just curious as to how it is for other people in the same situation. I kinda wondered this too. Our affair was found out and he left on the 28th, and we were in constant contact. But I think it may be different for me as we have been together for some time now. Link to post Share on other sites
daisygirl19 Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 In past years, we would speak/text several times a day and see each other whenever possible. If not Christmas Eve/Christmas Day, we would always spend the day after Christmas together, when he was in town (traveled to his wife's family out of state every other year). Now that he's moved out and waiting for his divorce to be final, we plan around our schedules with our kids. This year, it happened to work out that we both have our kids at the same time, so we will be together late Christmas Eve and Christmas morning and then as usual the day after Christmas. I will say, thinking back to the days of settling for whatever time he could get "away", I can't imagine ever going back there again. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 During the A I coped fine. The holiday season for me is about my family and not really one I focus on boyfriends and lovers. Even when in my non-A relationships my holidays have always been spent with my family and not necessarily with my SO on the day of. We might message each other but generally it's been that they are with their families (sometimes out of town) and I'm with mine. I haven't been in a super long term relationship yet where spending Christmas with each other's family is a thing. So during the A that part didn't bother me as much as it didn't feel out of the ordinary. We'd exchange messages or calls on the day but generally I was occupied with cooking, shopping, entertaining family or heading to family's homes to be entertained so I wasn't just all lonely worrying about my AP and what he was doing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lokin4AReason Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 do not really have any plan(s) ..... might just go over a friend(s) place but I would get that kind f third wheel feel =0/ haven't really talked to the wife ever since she walked out last month ... ( trying my best to cope w/ it ) so this holiday season will be a loner for me except being w/ the pet(s) Link to post Share on other sites
Sassy Girl Posted December 24, 2014 Share Posted December 24, 2014 It's our first christmas. We both have families. There might be some light email contact, but I wouldn't hold him to it. Both of us agree... Family comes first. In saying that, he took a holiday with his family and was in constant contact, so who knows. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Blu72 Posted December 24, 2014 Author Share Posted December 24, 2014 At thanksgiving I went out of state to visit family and normally we won't communicate when we are on vacation. He for some reason started blowing my email up after 2 days of being gone which is not like him. And we were emailing daily till I got back. This week I haven't heard from him and don't expect to, although it would be nice to get quick hello. But I'm sure I won't hear from him till next week cause he will be out of town. Link to post Share on other sites
Lady2163 Posted December 24, 2014 Share Posted December 24, 2014 I'm done with my affair, but we are still friends. Got an email today, just a quick question. Chatted a bit on Sunday, called yesterday for a quick question (we are tech geeks, so it happens a lot). Im Not a big holiday person. Single with no biological children. Link to post Share on other sites
Cheshire Posted December 24, 2014 Share Posted December 24, 2014 My MW has 2 sons who were growing up during our A, despite everything she would have had to organise to make a Christmas for them and other family, for several years she still found a second to text 'Happy Christmas x' to me at some point during Christmas day. My heart did a somersault each time she did that. Of course I wasn't allowed to text her back. But I loved it. Still sad that I'm not going to get one of those texts again. New Year's Day is still a bit emotional for me. After weeks/months of outrageous flirting, we first made love on January 1st 2000, weirdly symbolic. Set of circumstances, we had to go into work to check the computers for the 'Millennium Bug'. Just us two. We did do the work tbf. But then it just happened and 13 years of my life were suddenly spoken for. Link to post Share on other sites
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