Is NC harder when the MM still makes contact?

[prettyeyes87]

Is NC harder when the MM still makes contact or throws out "crumbs" to string you along?

 

I am almost NC for 2 months and despite a couple set backs, I feel ok about it I guess. But I think a little part of it is that he is not contacting me either, or at least not intiating. I think this would be harder for me if he was still senidng me messages here and there keeping me on the hook. At first, it hurt that he wasn't putting in any effort to contact me, but now I'm glad he didn't because I'm sure I would have failed and never made it this far. I also fear any contact in the future because I don't know if it will stir any feelings but I will cross that bridge when/if I get there...

 

Just wanted to know others thoughts on if it was easier when the exMM or exAP didn't contact you during NC?

[Popsicle]

Is NC harder when the MM still makes contact or throws out "crumbs" to string you along?

 

I am almost NC for 2 months and despite a couple set backs, I feel ok about it I guess. But I think a little part of it is that he is not contacting me either, or at least not intiating. I think this would be harder for me if he was still senidng me messages here and there keeping me on the hook. At first, it hurt that he wasn't putting in any effort to contact me, but now I'm glad he didn't because I'm sure I would have failed and never made it this far. I also fear any contact in the future because I don't know if it will stir any feelings but I will cross that bridge when/if I get there...

 

Just wanted to know others thoughts on if it was easier when the exMM or exAP didn't contact you during NC?

 

Without a doubt it is easier when there is absolutely no contact. That includes ceasing any FB stalking. Yes, it hurts to cut it off and you painstakingly wonder if they are thinking about you and missing you, but NC is the only way. When I went NC for a few months I worried of this too. That worry and missing him is what caused me to break NC. Then once we reunited I learned that he missed me and hurt too during that time. Well, now I have that question answered I think it will be easier next time to go NC. Just have to fight missing him.

Edited December 24, 2014 by Popsicle

[nikki76]

I went NC a few times and he was always the one to contact me and I would always cave.

 

This time....I did it right. I blocked him in everyway possible. It hurts a little that he hasn't tried to contact me. I think even if he tried contacting me on my phone, I would get a notification of a blocked call. I wonder, if he even misses me. I went NC cold turkey this time. No warning, no letter, just BAM.

 

But I know now, that if he contacted me, and i caved, everything would be hunky dory (lol)

And then the high would be over and I would be at square one again.

 

I dont ever want to feel unwanted again and deal with all the emotions that come with having an A. We deserve so much more then just crumbs. I'll take this pain of NC over the pain of dealing with an A.

 

So, to answer your question, in my experience, yes, I believe NC is SO much harder when they try to contact you.

[SoleMate]

Of course, contact attempts will make NC much harder. That's why it's so important to get all your technology blocks firmly in place.

[MissBee]

Is NC harder when the MM still makes contact or throws out "crumbs" to string you along?

 

I am almost NC for 2 months and despite a couple set backs, I feel ok about it I guess. But I think a little part of it is that he is not contacting me either, or at least not intiating. I think this would be harder for me if he was still senidng me messages here and there keeping me on the hook. At first, it hurt that he wasn't putting in any effort to contact me, but now I'm glad he didn't because I'm sure I would have failed and never made it this far. I also fear any contact in the future because I don't know if it will stir any feelings but I will cross that bridge when/if I get there...

 

Just wanted to know others thoughts on if it was easier when the exMM or exAP didn't contact you during NC?

 

Yes of course NC is easier if the person is not contacting you, as there is nothing to ignore, nothing to be tempted to respond to etc. You can just keep on keeping on.

 

With my former A he kept up NC so that made it A LOT easier for me. Guaranteed if he was still reaching out and such that things would have gone differently.