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If you are sleeping with someone, are you attached to the person?

emotionsmessmeup

By emotionsmessmeup,
in Friends and Lovers

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emotionsmessmeup

emotionsmessmeup

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Ok, so if it is just physical and If you are only sleeping with someone, are you still attached to the person?

for both men and women?

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EC

EC

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Some people say they can have sex and not get attached but I don't know....

 

I have always believed that unconsciously you get attached. I mean you are giving yourself to someone else. Your giving our body to someone else. Eventually if they find someone else and leave and the sex stops..your going to unconsciously think.."whats wrong with me?" "Why don't they want more than sex from me?"

 

IMHO....

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Illusion24

Illusion24

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Now as I get older I realize, sex is sex, but love is love and theirs nothing like "making love'....wow I think I want some more... :love::bunny:

 

If you can have sex with no strings attached...put your hands up..what what!! lol..sorry got a little carried away but just don't have sex to get others out of your mind...In the end it might f*ck you up and then you're turn around and realize "oh s*** what was I doing"..then you're stuck like chuck... :p

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emotionsmessmeup

emotionsmessmeup

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no..not having sex to get someone else out of your mind..but to get over the MASSIVE ATTRACTION with this person!

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EC

EC

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If its not to get over and just because you have a huge attraction to this person then by all means have sex and get it out of your system. Be careful and remember that this sex is not going to fill the void your feeling.

 

Also you may have a huge attraction to a person, have sex with them, and then think ok thats was it? NEXT! lol

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Illusion24

Illusion24

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Oh I see...yeah having sex would probably only get you to want him more...I have a friend like that...I could only imagine what the sex would be like, it was to intense to think about it so imagine do it...woo no thanx not me I'll just walk away it would probably save me some confusion...i think :confused:

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emotionsmessmeup

emotionsmessmeup

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well i dont know...

it definately didnt fill the void..

but i feel the colors...

it was fun!

worth it!

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EC

EC

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Sex without the sizzle is like lemonade without the pop, it quenches your thirst, but leaves you feeling flat!"

 

Its fun now and thats good. Have fun..and don't think about your ex. But the thing is 'some' girls I used to know, would break up with their BF then have meaningless sex with the first guy that makes them wet, and they focus so much attention on this guy and the sex, that they forget what a real relationship is like and they are so busy being confused about the FWB that they block any new romance form their lives....

 

Does that make sense?

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LucreziaBorgia

LucreziaBorgia

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It all depended on whether I was choosing, or was chosen.

 

I tended not to get attached to people I chose, and ended up desperately attached to people who chose me. People who choose me have always been very rare, so it would be safe to say I hardly ever got attached to sexual partners, male or female. The experiences I chose usually had an element of fetish or dominance/submission. I guess that's why I didn't get attached - because it wasn't the person I was with, so much as getting off on what they represented to me.

 

They generally ended up attached to me though (with the exception of a few pure FWB experiences) - because I would go out of my way to seduce someone and had a chameleon-like way of presenting myself to them in all the ways they wanted to see me, and it nearly always ended very badly when I got tired of playing that role or just got bored and was ready for something new. Sounds pretty bad, horrible in fact, I admit.

 

Looking back at it, I can honestly say I'm glad those days are behind me and I feel really badly for anyone who gets wrapped up with someone like I used to be.

 

Everyone has different reasons for not getting attached to sexual partners. I guess it entirely depends on the dynamics of the relationship between two given people.

 

no..not having sex to get someone else out of your mind..but to get over the MASSIVE ATTRACTION with this person!

 

That's funny you should mention that. Just the other day I was telling someone that 'animal attraction' may very well be one beast that dies when you feed it, and thrives and gets stronger when you don't feed it.

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emotionsmessmeup

emotionsmessmeup

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See...thats the thing...

who knows why i dont wanna be attached

who knows why he doesnt wanna be attached..

I am happy with ti the way it is..

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blind_otter

blind_otter

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Originally posted by emotionsmessmeup

See...thats the thing...

who knows why i dont wanna be attached

who knows why he doesnt wanna be attached..

I am happy with ti the way it is..

 

If neither of you want to be attached, isn't it a non-issue?

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emotionsmessmeup

emotionsmessmeup

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whts the issue...

no no we arent made for each other..

i am 5 8..he is 5 10...just 2 incehs talelr..

i dont know...it wud be really hilarious..if we get attached..i think its just faboulous this way...!

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CurlyIam

CurlyIam

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Your argument is very "solid", LOL!!! Who cares how tall he is? So you'll stop wearing extremely high hills, big deal!!

 

About sex: I always get emotionally attached after sleeping with a man. Only did it with a limited number of people (;)), so maybe that could explain it. To me it's a big deal, it's a part of me. I know that some of my friends feel quite differently about the subject.

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blind_otter

blind_otter

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IMO the only people who can f*ck on a regular basis and NOT get attached have attachment issues or emotional issues.

 

Like me. :o:(

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angelj

angelj

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the other posts have good answers...

 

as for myself, if im going into it as just sex then i come out of it as it was just sex. but that isnt the case all the time. ive been the girl that started having sex with a guy with the high hopes it would lead to more.

 

yeah not so much...

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TUDOR

TUDOR

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The only time I have been able to keep it just sex is when the sex turned out to be just average sex! The really great sex is hard to write off so easy. This might have something to do with the great sex being attributed to a great chemistry I have with that person. In which an investigation into this chemistry is warranted and now you are moving past that just sex line. Tricky....very tricky!

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emotionsmessmeup

emotionsmessmeup

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but u know its not even funny the line of FUNNY THINGS /humourous things that happen when we hang out...or....are in bed...

its almost like 2 funnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

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CurlyIam

CurlyIam

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If you think about it, it has already gotten beyond "just sex". Don't spoil it by overanalysing it, the rules are already laid on the table.

 

Just enjoy the ride while it lasts and prepare yourself to the possibility of ending just as abruptly as it started!

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CurlyIam

CurlyIam

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You'll be alright, girl! A little bit of innocent, pure sex never killed anybody ;) ;) ;)!!!

 

You haven't fallen for the stud boy, have you?

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emotionsmessmeup

emotionsmessmeup

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NO...Just enjoying the animal sex which is nto so innocent actually..but its fun coz I am innocent...! ;)

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CurvyGurl

CurvyGurl

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I'm not sleeping with anyone until I am attached to that person. Meaningless casual sex is not appealing to me.

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