needed

[Jatan]

Hi all,

I was drunk and i had sex with my guy workmate. He was drunk too. He is attached and so do I. I wanted it so much when I was drunk. I don't know if we can still work together at work. Views pls. Confuse uk gal. Will he still respect me at work?

[Satu]

Talk it over with your partner, he might have some useful insights to offer you.

[Jatan]

Talk it over with your partner, he might have some useful insights to offer you.

I don't think i want to talk about that night with him. Just want to pretend nothing has happened and continue to be friends and workmate.

However, i noticed the way he texts me nowadays sometime seem overboard and sometime teasing till i got sort of offended. I hope he too is trying to forget about that matters. He still ask me out though.

He is attached and so am I is the problem that I want to forget about it.

Confused though

[Mr. Lucky]

I was drunk and i had sex with my guy workmate. He was drunk too. He is attached and so do I.

 

How attached are you if you're willing to have drinks and sex with someone you work with ???

 

Mr. Lucky

[Satu]

I don't think i want to talk about that night with him. Just want to pretend nothing has happened and continue to be friends and workmate.

However, i noticed the way he texts me nowadays sometime seem overboard and sometime teasing till i got sort of offended. I hope he too is trying to forget about that matters. He still ask me out though.

He is attached and so am I is the problem that I want to forget about it.

Confused though

 

I was actually being sarcastic, rather than serious.

[Appreciate]

How old are you?

How long have you been in a relationship?

Have you ever cheated before?

Does anyone else know that you've cheated?

 

Do you feel guilty? If so, it's not showing in your posts. You seem more concerned about what the work guy thinks and how things will flow over at work.

[Appreciate]

I just read your other posts.

 

Not sure if you are for real, but if you are, it appears that you like and invite drama.

 

Do you feel like you have to men's attention in order to feel valuable as a woman? That would be my question to you.

[Jatan]

I just read your other posts.

 

Not sure if you are for real, but if you are, it appears that you like and invite drama.

 

Do you feel like you have to men's attention in order to feel valuable as a woman? That would be my question to you.

 

Of course not. Why do you judge women like this. Mistakes do happen. I do not want to cry over spilt milk or rather mistakes that i have made. I still have a life to move on. I am responsible for what i have done.

Just worried how our friendship will become. Put urself in my shoes. You too will feel guilty but still need to work to support one self.

I have posted in the other thread as i find the topic more relevant to my problem.

If you have no solution, pls do not reply as i do not need you to judge me.

[contact1]

The point trying to be made is you are not being responsible for what happened. You are committed to someone else and have cheated on them. Being drunk isn't an excused, no one forced you to drink or to be in that situation, you placed yourself in it. And now that it happened, you want to just label it a "mistake" and pretend it didn't happen.

 

Try putting yourself in "your partner's shoe" and how would they feel if they found out you had sex with some other man while drunk. What's going to happen the next time there is some social event with alcohol? Opps, I was just drinking again?

 

In regards to your co-worker, if he is asking you ask he wants to do it again, plain and simple. You have to be clear and direct you don't want that kind of involvement again. Not a "right now isn't a good time" response, a "no, I don't want to be involved, stop asking" type of response. Whether you two can work together still, no one can say, it depends on you and him.

[hoping2heal]

Of course not. Why do you judge women like this. Mistakes do happen. I do not want to cry over spilt milk or rather mistakes that i have made. I still have a life to move on. I am responsible for what i have done.

Just worried how our friendship will become. Put urself in my shoes. You too will feel guilty but still need to work to support one self.

I have posted in the other thread as i find the topic more relevant to my problem.

If you have no solution, pls do not reply as i do not need you to judge me.

 

You said are attached - do you mean to say feelings wise you are attached to the guy you work with - or that both of you have relationships with other people?

[mrs rubble]

Of course not. Why do you judge women like this. Mistakes do happen. I do not want to cry over spilt milk or rather mistakes that i have made. I still have a life to move on. I am responsible for what i have done.

Just worried how our friendship will become. Put urself in my shoes. You too will feel guilty but still need to work to support one self.

I have posted in the other thread as i find the topic more relevant to my problem.

If you have no solution, pls do not reply as i do not need you to judge me.

 

You weren't being judged. You were asked a question, and you were asked some more by another poster....if you answer the question's you may find the posters have some idea on how to advise you on a solution.

For example, if others (at work) know about you and your workmate getting it on together, then you have another whole set of issues to consider and I wouldn't be worried about your liason repecting you, I'd be worried about what the rest of the office and your superiors think of you.

[coolheadal]

No to working still together. You might put in for a transfer or he would need to do it. So you don't work in the same departments. You'll have to confess to your mate (lover or husband or BF) that's the right thing to do so they know what happens if you drink too much and get drunk. He needs to the do same with his (lover or wife or GF). Otherwise if they find out by other means then your asking for trouble. In your country things might a bit different here. We can as BOSS for transfer and tell them what happen after working hours. But anyway be careful next time because now look what has happen.

[whichwayisup]

Of course not. Why do you judge women like this. Mistakes do happen. I do not want to cry over spilt milk or rather mistakes that i have made. I still have a life to move on. I am responsible for what i have done.

Just worried how our friendship will become. Put urself in my shoes. You too will feel guilty but still need to work to support one self.

I have posted in the other thread as i find the topic more relevant to my problem.

If you have no solution, pls do not reply as i do not need you to judge me.

 

You can't just be 'friends' with him like you were before. Drunk or not, you both chose to have sex! You two crossed the lines and it was wrong. Stupid and wrong because you both have partners. Instead of worrying if your 'friendship' with him is salvageable, put all your focus and energy into your partner at home.

 

You work with this guy, so keep it non personal and professional only. No more texting at all!

[asiangirl]

I just read your other posts.

 

Not sure if you are for real, but if you are, it appears that you like and invite drama.

 

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/481358-my-love-turning-platonic-after-her-affair#post5753618

 

 

you read this post of OP? In this thread, she said she married with kids.

 

I'm gonna pull a quote that you post in that thread six months ago.

Quote from Jatan (Mrs. OP)

[Hi, i am in the same situation as you. My remorseful hubby planned a holidays trip with just me and him to relax and hopefully rekindle our sparks again. I know it will never be the same. I always ask myself will i be happier if i were to leave him. To me my answer will be no. Not any better to myself and my kids.]

 

Mrs. Op, are you still married? If you are, then please don't sleep around behind your husband back. It is about moral, please don't do that to your husband.

Even if your marriage is running out of sparks or unhappy, still don't cheat please.

Edited December 29, 2014 by asiangirl