Christy8730 Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Hi, this may be long but I don't want to confuse everyone by leaving out the details, I'm 27 and slept with my cousins brother in law, he's 18, I'm a little confused by what he wants because he's acting a lot different than what he used to around me, it was always the 4 of us for the past couple of years, me, him, my cousin and his sister that my cousin is married to, we all went out and got a hotel room for a night because we were drinking, he doesn't drink much so he got drunk easily, his sister and my cousin encouraged me to make a move on him and I did, he told them he wanted to do something with me that night, when they went outside I leaned in to kiss him and he kissed me, before that he got a little arrogant and said "I know you want it" I just laughed at him, he knew I liked him, he likes me too, he's told my cousin and his sister said she can tell he does, he talks a lot of noise about different girls he's been with and sex, all he listens to are rap songs about sex and my cousin said he thinks he's a virgin, his mom and sister said the same thing, now he's acting funny, he used to talk and joke around with me some but he doesn't since we slept together, his mom thinks he's shocked or embarrassed because he can't remember anything, she said she asked him if I forced myself on him and he said no I'm pretty sure I was willing I just can't remember much, when somebody tries to talk to him about it he says he doesn't want to talk about it, I want to talk to him but he acts like I'm not even there, I know he likes me, I just don't know what to do, he's a little shy, what should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I know how he feels - I don't want to talk about it either. Link to post Share on other sites
Danda Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Maybe you should try apologizing? He was extremely drunk and you took advantage. Now he may have lost his V-card and can't even remember it. Damn. I mean sure given he's a male and you're a female, chances are that you didn't physically harm him, and we know you didn't knock him up or anything. But still, he has a brain and emotions just like every other human. Then you don't know what kind of anxiety he might be having about other issues, like are you on birth control and did the two of you use a condom, not like he can remember it clearly. I'm not gonna skewer you as some sinister, selfish person here, but in my honest opinion what you did was wrong and you owe him a genuine apology and an, "Are you okay?" / "Do you want to talk?" 2 Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Your going to have to back off and take things timely with him. He's much younger than you. Most guys talk the talk (brag) but when the going gets going the results afterwards is a different story. He does sound confused and worried now. You being older should have just do kissing, cuddling and holding hands and take it slow. No you had taken it to the next level. So now you see what happens with him. Just have to wait it out for now. If he does come around? He just might not? Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Well, you're 27 and he's only 18. What do you want? Just some fun? If so, just act like nothing happened and start joking with him again. Because of the age difference and how you describe him, I doubt anything else might come of it anyway? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Christy8730 Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 (edited) he's tried a couple of times before this to get me to have sex with him and he wasn't drunk or high then but he was underage and I ignored him, his mom says he's bipolar, I want to try to apologize to him but he's always got somebody around him and his family is nosey, he doesn't want them in his business and he got mad because his sister told everybody, she said she saw us, I'm not even sure he's a virgin or if he's not, we used a condom, I wouldn't say nothing would come out of it, he's had girlfriends before but he's never done anything with them but I don't know that, that's what his moms told me, he wants a girlfriend and always talks about how he hates being single Edited December 30, 2014 by Christy8730 Link to post Share on other sites
CC12 Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 (edited) If I were him, I would feel really weird about it. Are you not able to put yourself in his shoes? Imagine yourself as an 18 year old and a man a decade older than you had sex with you when you were blackout drunk one night. Even if you had a crush on him and wanted to have sex with him previously, is that what you would have wanted your first time with him to be like? Would you still want to joke around and flirt as you did before? I wouldn't think so. Honestly, I think you really ****ed up, and I don't even know what you could do to smooth things over. You should at least try talking to him, and like a previous poster said, ask him if he's okay with what happened and if he wants to talk about it. Ask him if the two of you can try to forget about it and move on, but really, if he never wants to see you again, I think that would be a completely appropriate response and you'd have to accept it. Edited December 30, 2014 by CC12 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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