Moving on

[Onyx]

No one can tell you how hard a divorce is going to be, it just doesn't work that way.

 

Come August 17th,2005 , I will have lived seperate of my soon to be Ex for one year. One year in which I havn't received a dime of child support, suffered two miscarraiges without any support from him and have had to take the boot on every financial aspect.

 

I'm not angry, I'm not sad. I'm not in love, though in retrospect I dont think I ever way.

 

I've accepted that no judge, no lawyer and no one on this earth can give me back the last three years of my life, or put a dollar price to my suffering and the suffering that he exacted on my daughter. I've accepted that I am going to be the sole parent to me child and that my needs are never going to be primary.

 

What I cannot accept is being afraid. My life and the life of my child have been verbally threatened.

I cannot accept threats against anyone whom I might bring into a relationship with with me.

I cannot accept having my loyalty and fidelity challenge by a man who has doubted all along that I have been faithful and that the child he tries to use as a pawn, is not his. Yet his own behavior would signify that he was having relations with another invidual.

I cannot accept being verbally abused and the attempts of being humiliated and intimadated.

 

I want to move on with my life, am I wrong for this?

I'm sitting here with the summons to be delivered to this .. so called man.

I had expected to be regretful, but I dont feel regret. I feel that I slowly, but surely gaining my freedom and my strength as a person back.

 

I am a woman, a mother and a person and I'll be damned if I let anyone make me feel less then that.

[clynn]

Good on you!