Ksspeerfisher Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 Yeah I was dumped a few months ago by my girl of one year. She told me all the usual how she needed to concentrate on her job and kids and didn't have time for a relationship and wasn't ready for one and wanted to be independent and not a burden on me. We exchanged a few harsh text she said she didn't love me and never did and that she was using me and I was a stupid city boy. I told her she needed theropy and get her priorities straight. I had to break NC because she wasn't paying a bill that was in my name. And she immediately started attacking me and told me she could never forgive me, although I don't know for what. And she said it was all my fault she was alone for the holidays but she dumped me for the most cliche of reasons. And I can't see how it's my fault when I'm the one who was dumped. Did she just expect me to take her crap and not stand up for myself? Did she want me to be ok with just waiting for her to be ready? And since I moved on and now am living for myself she thinks it's all my fault like I dumped her. Any insight will help. She is a truly stubborn and proud person and she knows it's a fault in this but won't admit it. Link to post Share on other sites
lolablue17 Posted January 6, 2015 Share Posted January 6, 2015 I don't know if she was using you, but she sure is now. Don't cooperate. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ksspeerfisher Posted January 6, 2015 Author Share Posted January 6, 2015 No I cancelled all bills in my name. She is on her own but still accuses me of it all being my fault and acts like I dumped her. Just now she's texting me about having another girlfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ksspeerfisher Posted January 6, 2015 Author Share Posted January 6, 2015 I mean honestly?!! How can she be turning me into the dumper and her the dumped? I had no intention of ever leaving her. I knew things were a little stressful with the distance we live from each other and only seeing each other once a month for about a week but I had no doubTs in that I was moving up to her this year. Link to post Share on other sites
headspins Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 I have experienced this numerous times. There is only 1 word for it&its manipulation&creating mass confusion is ever so key for the manipulator. I have been in situations with my stbx wife where she was clearly in the wrong. Granted not every situation is clear-cut&i know it sounds childish "no you did it" your fault,but lemme tell you something about having the ability to manuevar out of being pushed into a corner. To twist it up&have you feel crazy as hell&blaming yourself is their mission. Makes it easier for them. Im not saying women for anyone starting to get bent outta shape. Men too. Nevertheless, she did you a favor man. Trust me. Link to post Share on other sites
lil hoodlum Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 I have experienced this numerous times. There is only 1 word for it&its manipulation&creating mass confusion is ever so key for the manipulator. I have been in situations with my stbx wife where she was clearly in the wrong. Granted not every situation is clear-cut&i know it sounds childish "no you did it" your fault,but lemme tell you something about having the ability to manuevar out of being pushed into a corner. To twist it up&have you feel crazy as hell&blaming yourself is their mission. Makes it easier for them. Im not saying women for anyone starting to get bent outta shape. Men too. Nevertheless, she did you a favor man. Trust me. Sounds like Borderline Personality Disorder. BPD Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ksspeerfisher Posted March 17, 2015 Author Share Posted March 17, 2015 I cut contact and pretty much am over it all. But she still texts me and is very hot and cold, she says it is the distance that she can't handle. She wants me there all the time and that me only being able to see her four to ten days a month makes her feel like she doesn't know me at all. We have mutual friends and I know she's dating again but lies to me when I metion it and attacks me about everything she thinks I've done. Now she's warped her thoughts about me and is constantly calling me a liar because I didn't fallow through with paying bills and taking her and her kids on vacations we had planned before she dumped me. Most the time I just ignore her and don't respond and just ask about the kids but this seems to anger her even more. Link to post Share on other sites
dave_1966 Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 Why are you even conversing with her? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ksspeerfisher Posted March 17, 2015 Author Share Posted March 17, 2015 We have mutual friends and her family and I are close. Also her dad is my boss sort of and when I don't talk to her at least once a month she starts blowing up my phone and talking cap to her dad about me Link to post Share on other sites
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