PureRain Posted January 8, 2015 Share Posted January 8, 2015 My ex gf a few months back started talking to me again, she was really depressed and accidentally overdosed on oxycotton so she called me crying and asked me to come take care of her, I did. Once she was feeling better she decided to 'repay' me with sex. After that night she asked to be **** buddies. She seems to be following in my footsteps since we broke up, I started smoking again, she started smoking, I started drinking from time to time and so did she. I smoked pot with her brother and she tried to talk her brother into smoking with her. I quit smoking pot and drinking and then she did too. We've been **** buddies since we started talking again. However, she's started adding more and more 'feelings' into it. At the same time she takes the feelings away, randomly telling me she doesn't love me like she used to and wants to be with other people. After the first time she did this I stopped responding to the feelings. She's only slept with one person other than me and it was her best female friend. They actually just broke up yesterday. Her family seems to be trying to get her to date me again and chewed her out when she was all over me, but dating other people. They told me they didn't want her to hurt me again. She invests a lot of time into me, but it's not usually through any form of talking. She made me a CD, she choose a song as 'our song', she brings me to go get coffee at the coffee shop everywhere. The thing that confuses me the most is the sex, she makes it all about pleasing me. She refuses to let me please her in any way, aside from regular intercourse, but she'll do anything I ask even if it's painful( I don't intend to ever hurt her, she just never tells me when certain positions hurt or she's too sore). Today she told me she was flirting with this guy she's had a crush on forever. Her sister and my mom both think she's trying to make me jealous. I honestly don't feel jealous at all, she's just going to cheat on him with me like she did the other people she dated. She always dates people who live 50+miles away that can almost never visit. My question is, does she have feelings for me still, or does she just really like having sex with me and being friends? If it's just about the sex why does she want to cuddle and go on dates so much, she doesn't deny being my girlfriend when people say she is even though we aren't dating. She broke up with me with the typical 'I'm not good enough for you, you deserve someone better' thing. Could she honestly feel that way though? She has every poem I write her and every item i've gotten her. Thanks for your time and advice! Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted January 8, 2015 Share Posted January 8, 2015 No paragraphs. Didn't read. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PureRain Posted January 8, 2015 Author Share Posted January 8, 2015 That's my phone's fault. I tried getting on my computer to fix it, but it wont let me edit it at all. I had it spaced out and paragraphed, but my phone does stupid stuff sometimes. Link to post Share on other sites
newlyborn Posted January 8, 2015 Share Posted January 8, 2015 it sounds like she is getting everything she wants without having to limit her options by becoming your girlfriend officially. you took care of her when she overdosed. you sleep with her regularly. you hang out with her when she wants. and i assume that you aren't dating others. she has all the benefits of a boyfriend and none of the responsibility. if you are fine with things as they are -- and it sounds like you are not too stressed or unhappy with things, then just continue until you or she decides to stop or to pursue something with someone else. if you are NOT fine with things as they are, i suggest that you stop catering to all her needs, whims, and desires and start dating other people. this will force her to step up or bow out for good, and you will have your answer about how she really feels about you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PureRain Posted January 9, 2015 Author Share Posted January 9, 2015 it sounds like she is getting everything she wants without having to limit her options by becoming your girlfriend officially. you took care of her when she overdosed. you sleep with her regularly. you hang out with her when she wants. and i assume that you aren't dating others. she has all the benefits of a boyfriend and none of the responsibility. if you are fine with things as they are -- and it sounds like you are not too stressed or unhappy with things, then just continue until you or she decides to stop or to pursue something with someone else. if you are NOT fine with things as they are, i suggest that you stop catering to all her needs, whims, and desires and start dating other people. this will force her to step up or bow out for good, and you will have your answer about how she really feels about you. I actually have dated other girls, I haven't slept with any yet though. We're both about even in that aspect. I don't know what she talks to other guys about though. She caught me talking to my friends about this other girl I was seeing and acted jealous, flirting, getting really close, took me into private and started kissing me. Today she came over and we did things, although this time was the strangest after we were done she got all cuddled up with me and laughed a bunch. I was in a really good mood when I brought her home and said 'I'll miss you' without thinking about it. She smiled at me told me she'll miss me too, kissed me then we both realized what we said, she blushed and we just awkwardly sat there for a little bit. I guess I don't really mind, we're both leaving soon. I'm going to go train to be a Marine Core Officer, and she's going to join the air force. Although she did ask me not to sleep with to many people because she wanted to meet back up when we were on leave. I could just be her best friend that she loves, but is no longer in love with. I'm the only person who accepts her for who she is(She's bisexual, 'genderfluid', metalhead, and makes really dark jokes). She's really beautiful, and sexy which is probably why she has so many guys ask her to sleep with them. I've had a couple guys threaten me because they claim to be 'inlove' with her and find out she's all over me still. She always picks me over everyone else at least. Link to post Share on other sites
Jimmyjackson Posted January 9, 2015 Share Posted January 9, 2015 No paragraphs. Didn't read. Why bother commenting then? Link to post Share on other sites
lonewalker Posted January 9, 2015 Share Posted January 9, 2015 Question is. Do you still want her back? Do you still love her? If yes... then continue to gove her good sex. Good sex makes females fall in love. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PureRain Posted January 13, 2015 Author Share Posted January 13, 2015 Question is. Do you still want her back? Do you still love her? If yes... then continue to gove her good sex. Good sex makes females fall in love. I'm not sure what I feel for her to be honest. I have a connection to her that I don't have with anyone else of course. She told me she's still in love with me, but doesn't know what she wants out of life. She actually has a boyfriend now I guess, we just slept together a few days ago and she asked to hook up again soon. She even paid for a date today, and wants to again Sunday. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 If she's giving you mixed signals, she isn't giving you the correct signals. She wants you as a safety net. Don't be the gullible sucker that allows such a thing to happen. If she has a boyfriend, then there's nothing for you to discuss or communicate about. Either way, stop being the spineless sap and stop communicating with her. Link to post Share on other sites
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