vickimonster Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 Hello, am new here, but thought maybe you guys could offer some thoughts and advice. Was with my b/f for four and half years, then in January he left me, I had all of about two weeks of thingink, something weird is going on the bam he left me. I had a couple of weeks where everything was very hard, then all of a sudden it was like I had a life defining moment. I realised that while I still want him, I don't need him and that this was the best oppertunity I have had in years to make changes that I needed. I was depressed for pretty much our whole relationship, nothing to do with him, just bad timing is all. I think he left me because the depression got too much for him, I was just sinking lower and lower. So him leaving me turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened to me. So I don't need him, but I do still care about him. I feel like we had a really strong relationship, at it's foundations, but I needed the freedom to change. I have done that now and I want to try again. Hey it might not work, but I am the kind of person who would rather try then regret not having tried. My ex however is a tough one to talk to. I have to work out how to get him to talk about this, cause bassically if I say can we try again I'll etiher get no, or I don't know. And that will be that as far as he is concerned. So can anyone suggest how to get him to talk abou this one? Approaches to use, does anyone have any other advice at all. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
upsetnhurt Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 Why would you want to be with someone who can't communicate with you? Communication is key to having any success in a relatioship don't you think? Link to post Share on other sites
Author vickimonster Posted March 28, 2005 Author Share Posted March 28, 2005 He is not totally incapable of communicating, this is a tough one for both of us. Thing is I communicated by talking and talking and talking and talking, to the point where what I am saying just becomes nonsense, he is not that kind of person. He has his own way of telling you things, and I am not so hot on listening and looking for his ways. When we are working, on the same wave length we are good as work with each other. I help him to talk more he helps me to listen more, but I got so caught up with me I stopped listening, and now he is afraid to talk coz how crap does it feel to tell someone how your feeling only to find they aren;t listening. Hmmm hope that all makes sense. Link to post Share on other sites
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