ruthieo Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 This is my problem I have always been raised in church, I am a good girl who loves the lord. I love playing the piano and singing in church. Working for the lord. Last May my Fiance broke up with me for no reason at all. I felt so lost and alone. During that summer I got involved with another guy. I think I was more on being in a relationship than actually who the person was. Well The relationship wasn't of God and it wasn't' what he wanted to happen for me. I knew that but didn't really care because I was with someone. Thing happened and we had premarital sex. Which is totally against my religion. We believe that you should save yourself for your husband. Well Things got so far that we were planning on getting married this June. I broke up with him this past weekend. I knew that if we got married we would be miserable. I didn't want to get suck in a marriage like that. I haven't really had a relationship with God for the past year, and I have done things in that time that I will never be able to erase or get back. I regret alot. I feel like God is never going to take me back. I don't know What to do and I don't know who I am. I have lived my life for the past two years in someone else's shadow. I was who ever my boyfriend was. I never had an opinion about anything. Whatever he wanted was hat I wanted? When I ended things I told him that I had to find my self. Find out who I wanted to be. I feel like God nor any other guy is going to what me. I have given up so much and I feel like I am worthless. Will God ever take me back. Will he help me find out who I am? Can anyone relate Link to post Share on other sites
tiki Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 Of course he will!!!! Find a church that you like and trust, then you'll get back into the swing of things. Depending on your regular ritual, repent, pray for forgiveness and continue on! Good luck to you! Link to post Share on other sites
Mz. Pixie Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 YES YES YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He will take you back. He's already forgiven you- you need to forgive yourself- which is the hardest thing to do when you've sinned and you know it. God Love You and desires to be in fellowship with you- HE never left- you left him. He's waiting there for you- seek him. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 You should already know the story of the prodical son. You do realize that like a shepard watching over hundreds of sheep, he'd leave the flock, (open to danger even), to find even just one missing. You wondered away from that flock and now He seeks you out. So not only will He take you back, He's been actively trying to re-locate you. Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 Originally posted by ruthieo Will God ever take me back. Will he help me find out who I am? Ask Him. I'm agnostic, but a relationship is a relationship and I'll say the same thing that I would say about any other relationship. No one here can speak for another. If you want to know how someone else feels, what they will or won't accept, then you have to go to that person -- or God -- directly and ask them. If they have others that are assigned (appointed) to speak for them (in God's case perhaps ministers) then go to those representatives and ask. I'm sorry you are feeling so bad. It won't last forever though, and we all have to experience some heartbreak and doubt along the way -- it helps us to recognize joy and confidence later on. Link to post Share on other sites
ThumbingMyWay Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 Originally posted by Moose So not only will He take you back, He's been actively trying to re-locate you. I agree 100%... sometimes it seems like God abandons us......it seems that way....I know I have felt it in the last few weeks....but the truth is....He hasnt.....he is always there....always watching and waiting for me. He will forgive me....becasue i believe in Him......Gods Grace is new everyday.... Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 I haven't really had a relationship with God for the past year, and I have done things in that time that I will never be able to erase or get back. I regret alot. I feel like God is never going to take me back. I don't know What to do and I don't know who I am ruthie, in the past 10 years, I've encountered many people who have shared their spiritual journey with me when I've interviewed them for the church paper I'm with. One thing that always stuck in my mind was that no matter what ministry they do, or how well they've put their faith of God in action, a lot will start out by saying, "I don't see how I am special, I've strayed," "I've made a lot of mistakes," or "I've had some bad spots in my life." And it's occured to me that sometimes, those very things that are "bad" or those times we've strayed away from God just make us all the more stronger because we become more aware of the graces he gives as we turn our heads back toward him. God loves you because you're his, and you always will be, no matter how upset you may be with him, no matter how far you stray, no matter how much you tell yourself you don't deserve to be his -- or even how strongly you deny he exists. That love is solid, and circumstances don't change it. Think of all the people you know in your life -- there is bound to be someone who loves you so much that they overlook your faults, someone who believes forgiveness and being with you is much, much more important to y'alls relationship because that love is so great. It's the same with God, only many, many times greater. It's a hard thing to grasp when you're focused on the hurt or pain in your life, but know that his love is a constant thing, not conditional. as for the screwing up, well, remember that the road to God often is a crooked path rather than a straight line, and those "left turns" we take are meaningful in and of themselves when they help us grow closer to the goal. quank Link to post Share on other sites
ThumbingMyWay Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 Originally posted by quankanne [And it's occured to me that sometimes, those very things that are "bad" or those times we've strayed away from God just make us all the more stronger because we become more aware of the graces he gives as we turn our heads back toward him. thats exactly it....He had a plan for us along....he knew what we would do or what would happen to us before we were even born to this earth. We all have "bad" times in our life on earth.....its his plan. He wants to see what we do with the "bad".....if we can use these times to better ourselves and bring us closer to Him, then that pleases him. Read Romans 7: 1-6. not sure if it will help you...but I believe the idea in this verse tells ME that what happened to me in the past is gone....and if I believe in the truth, the Good News....the old ME died with Christ when I accpeted him, and then the new me can grow in the new way, by his Spirit.... Also read the rest of Romans 7 and all of Romans 8...I think it may help you.... Link to post Share on other sites
snoop_dawg22 Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 GOD is an awesome and forgiving GOD. No matter what you've done. If you've asked for forgivness and prayed. He will forgive. God is slow to anger and quick to love. But it is ultimatley up to you how you want your relationship with God to be. Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 Originally posted by quankanne And it's occured to me that sometimes, those very things that are "bad" or those times we've strayed away from God just make us all the more stronger because we become more aware of the graces he gives as we turn our heads back toward him. That's what I said! Philosophically speaking, maybe Agnostics and Christians aren't all that different! We just attribute these things to different sources! we all have to experience some heartbreak and doubt along the way -- it helps us to recognize joy and confidence later on. ruthio - NO ONE is worthless. NO ONE. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 You're a good girl because you are and not because god made you so. You should have faith in love, romance, erotica, fun, and joy. Sex is not dirty, it makes us happy if combined with love. If god really loves you, he should understand that we were born to live not to wilt. We are people, not saints. God is not looking at 1.9 billion of Christians. What is he, a voyeur? You want to know who you are. Look at yourself from closer and that's who you are: your body with all its desires, your feelings when not influenced by any external power, your mind when educated and open, your love when let burn, your spirit when it hovers freely above your heart. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted March 28, 2005 Share Posted March 28, 2005 God loves us the way parents love children. Would you 'abandon' your son because he broke a lamp? Would you refuse the attention of your daughter because she wrote on the wall? He understands we are human and frail and make mistakes. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted March 29, 2005 Share Posted March 29, 2005 We are people, not saints interestingly enough, there are some great role models in saints: St. Paul, one of the staunchest supporters of Christ, at first went around bad-mouthing Jesus and pretty much spiritually slaying those who professed Christ; St. Augustine of Hippo, a true hedonist who found his way back to God, also comes to mind. God isn't asking for perfection from us, just our love .... and those people we consider "saintly," "good," "holy," etc., are seen thusly because of that love, not because they are spiritual Goody Two Shoes! Link to post Share on other sites
XNemesisX Posted March 29, 2005 Share Posted March 29, 2005 I am agnostic, but I think that a lot of how you are feeling right now comes from how you were raised (a little like brainwashing). I've seen a lot of people who had these beliefs engrained in their minds since children go through the same thing you are, but those who were not raised devout Christian seem to be far more liberal so I really think this is some serious brainwashing going on. (I am not saying that is either good or bad, but I think you may be being too hard on yourself). Children tend to take in things a lot better than adults, so this makes perfect sense. Just like how children are better able to learn foreign languages than adults...well anyway that discussion is for another time... What you have done is NOT that bad, and I'm sure you already know the answer to your question. If you believe in God then you should know he will forgive anyone, even murderers - so premarital sex is NOTHING in comparison to what your God will forgive. (which correct me if I'm wrong, but the Christian God will forgive anything EXCEPT blasphemy?) Ruthi, sweetie, you are only human. Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted March 29, 2005 Share Posted March 29, 2005 If God didn't actively want to take sinners back, why would he have sent Jesus in the first place? To quote the man himself, it isn't the healthy who need a doctor. The cross, grace and forgiveness are central to christianity. Maybe this is an opportunity for you to experience them for yourself rather than as an abstract teaching? Link to post Share on other sites
suegail Posted March 30, 2005 Share Posted March 30, 2005 I used to read books by Corrie Ten Boom, a Dutch lady with a strong Christian faith who during the holocaust saved many Jewish people from death. Anyway, she wrote quite a few books, and in one book I remember her saying that when we sin we should go to God in prayer and ask for his forgiveness, and because God does forgive and does not remember those sins against us in any way, she liked to think of it as having cast those sins into the ocean with a sign which reads, "NO FISHING." Please don't worry. If you were far from God, you wouldn't care about this, it wouldn't concern you. If you've asked God to forgive you, (and you probably have) he has already done that. You can be sure. Link to post Share on other sites
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