cottom Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Ive been seeing a girl for the past month, she is a breath of fresh air for what ive been with before and its someone i can see myself being with for a long time. This week she dropped a bombshell on me though, shes been asked to work abroad for 3 months in Zante (the british equivalent of spring break) as a club rep. Basically the place where "lads" spend a year in the gym to go for a week and get drunk, get naked and sleep with girls. She said its for an experience and to get away from the place she lives. Ive been on these holidays before, ive seen it all, i had a gf at the time though and a week away i ended up staying in most nights. But her job is basically approach groups of lads and convince them to come into the club by being slutty etc and away for 3 months is a horrible thing for me to sit at home and think about whats she doing whats she doing whos she with, is she cheating. Because ive spoke to all the old reps whove done it and nobody stays faithful. I cant handle being in a relationship for the next 5 months, then she goes and i lose all the effort i put in, but then again this is a girl i genuinely want to be with, better than any girl ive met before. But then if i do be with her i might change her mind because she hasnt brought the tickets yet etc to go. Its the only thing stopping us getting together fully, she said "i want to be with you but with working away. But then i dont want you to be with anyone else and i wont get with anyone else" Im just confused about it, do i tell her to leave it now and move on before it does get serious? Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Unless you want are able to forgive early cheating in a relationship very quickly, you should leave it. Maybe you'll meet again a few years later but now is not the time. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
soyou Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Lets say if you can stop her from going to Zante, how about many other trips which she may have in future? Are you going to stop her from all of those? Being in a good and healthy relationship means you can trus the person wherever she goes and whatever she does. If you think you cant trust her, then just drop it. Kwowing the Brtishing partying and ho'ring lifestyle, I do understand where your concern comes from though. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 IMO if she was serious about your relationship she wouldn't consider going. Dude she's not that into you, this was just casual for her and how serious can it be when you only have been "seeing each other for a month". I have a feeling she is going to say to you "well it was nice knowing you, but I have to go now...." Link to post Share on other sites
lolablue17 Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Life contains choices that people have to make along the way. She have to choose between investing in her new relationship (with you), or grabbing the chance to have fun and get experiences with this REP job opportunity. She only knows you for a month, that's why she is allowing herself to give up on you, and take this great refreshing job. Luckily you also know her only for a month, because if it was a year or more, it was much more painful. I believe that if you knew her for years, even married to her, you could trust her much better than you do now, when it's so fresh. She has to make a choice. You or the job. Link to post Share on other sites
michellew Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Not everyone is a cheater and there's no guarantee she'll cheat on you. Maybe she's going in with the mindset to work and just make money. Is she the type of girl that is okay with one night stands and partying? You've only known her for a month. Can you just put the relationship on hold and see how things go when she gets back? Link to post Share on other sites
michellew Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 IMO if she was serious about your relationship she wouldn't consider going. Dude she's not that into you, this was just casual for her and how serious can it be when you only have been "seeing each other for a month". I have a feeling she is going to say to you "well it was nice knowing you, but I have to go now...." It's only been a month! She's smart to still go. It doesn't mean she's not serious about him, but to choose between a guy you've known for a month and an opportunity she was probably considering beforehand....its a no brainier. In my opinion, a girl who would drop everything after only knowing a guy for a month would be the fool. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 It's only been a month! She's smart to still go. It doesn't mean she's not serious about him, but to choose between a guy you've known for a month and an opportunity she was probably considering beforehand....its a no brainier. In my opinion, a girl who would drop everything after only knowing a guy for a month would be the fool. And only a fool would consider a LDR with these circumstances. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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