krooton25 Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 (edited) My ex (bf of 3 years cheated, left me and married another woman. All happened in one year:lmao: Now I'm almost turning 25 and I haven't found a bf yet. It's been half a year since we broke up. He brought so much shame and heartbreak to me, and now I am left alone thinking whether i would still find the one for me or not. All the guys who liked me, I didn't like and don't seem compatible with me and the guys I liked all have girlfriends or just plain not interested in me. My friend recently told me that if I wanna be married before 30, i should be looking for a bf now coz guys want younger girls. I feel so depressed. I am scared i will never find someone I like..and I don't want to settle for just anything. I am not really gonna be happy with that..and my ex broke my heart so many times. I want to heal, find someone new and be happy. Edited January 12, 2015 by krooton25 Link to post Share on other sites
endlessabyss Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Felt the same way when my ex left me. Now I only feel I'll die alone on occasion lol. Been single for going on 3 years! I know the fear all to well. You'll be alright though. Heal, and someone will be waiting right around the corner. Link to post Share on other sites
kolleamm Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 There's more to life than finding a bf. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Your life has barely started. Many, MANY people don't marry until their 30's. You're 25. Take a deep breath and enjoy this time of your life. When you're ready, you'll meet someone. Next time you step outside your door, just quickly take a count of how many "cute guys" you notice in a given day. You only need *one* of them to marry you. The odds are in your favor. Try remember that 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TouchedByViolet Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 6 months single is not long. Also, sounds like your bf was not good to you.... plenty of guys out there that will treat you right Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 (edited) Well, first of all, life doesn't come to an end if you don't find a husband. Life goes on. I've lived a mostly happy life and achieved my most important dreams and never been married or had kids and am now in my sixties. Don't let other friends tell you what YOU want. Conventional wisdom these days is to wait until you are past 30 and have a career well established before having kids because one you have kids, your life is never your own again. If you love, love, love kids, then that's great and you should have them because that would be your dream, but if you have other dreams, if you don't pursue them now, you likely won't be able to start pursuing them after kids. I will have people argue about this, but lots of life experience tells me this is so. Yes, many men like younger women. So you marrying one your own age in your twenties won't prevent him from trading you in once you're over 35 if that's the kind of man he is. So you need to not choose quickly because you want to find a good one. Marrying young does not keep a man from leaving you for younger, and many of them will. So your friends' logic is telling you to hurry up and grab a guy now so you can at least marry him before he's ready to dump you for younger. Married people always want other people to be married and people with kids always want other people to be childed for many reasons, including they don't like singles around their man, their man doesn't let them go out with their single girlfriends. Ones with kids, many of them begin to see everyone as a potential play date of babysitter. They're stuck at home, so they want you stuck there with them. And they also want you to want to be like them because that validates their choices. Never rush in choosing a mate. It will either happen you will find the right guy or it won't. It's better not to marry than to marry a bad one. It sounds to me like your friends may be trying to make you feel bad and like a failure. That couldn't be further from the truth. At 25, your brain is just now fully formed and mature and able to understand consequences of your actions. The truth is your 25-yr-old married and childed friends are probably jealous of the freedom you still have. Edited January 12, 2015 by preraph 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Bellaisa Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 My friend recently told me that if I wanna be married before 30, i should be looking for a bf now coz guys want younger girls. And how does she know that? Is she an expert on how every guys feels? Does she have insight into some hidden knowledge that most people don't have? Seriously - that's an opinion, not a fact. As someone who is 37, and who talks to single guys through my line of work every single day, I can tell you that being 30-something is not old, and there are plenty of single guys in their thirties looking for women in their thirties. The problem is that you may have had the intention to be married by a certain age. That expectation is what is causing the fear. Remove any expectations you have about when - because you can't control the 'when' - and just enjoy the process. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 i should be looking for a bf now coz guys want younger girls Wow, just wow. So you want to degrade yourself as the pet of a guy who just wants to screw 'young things'? And you're absolutely sure he'd make good husband-material if all he wanted you for were your looks? Sorry but your friend should change her attitude regarding how-to-get-a-husband. These aren't the middle ages anymore where the old wife would be replaced on a whim. Link to post Share on other sites
Omei Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Title made me giggle, you're so young. Just think how people at 60 feel. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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