what do you think?

[Simon Phoenix]

And yet.... I've still done NOTHING..... I stopped over to pick something up... that's all. we had a brief discussion... that's all and it was over and I left.

 

 

but you just keep attacking me. its not really WHAT you say... as i'm open to opinions... its HOW you say it.... you're rude as ****. period.

 

 

if you notice... the thread was positive and I was even mostly agreeing with people advice to leave her be.... yada yada...

 

 

then you show up after a day or two of not posting and right back to talking **** like you're the ****ing break up guru

 

Your comments in return have been more rude than the comments that were given. But enough about that. You had this meetup, now it's time to completely disappear. No more texting, no more calling, no more meetups, no more drive-bys. It's time for you to let her do her while you do you. The "negative" commentors are right -- it's up to her what she wants to do with her life and not up to you. The more you try to influence, the less effective it will be. So work on yourself and leave her be and things will happen on their own.

[William]

Lets end the bickering by all parties and get back on topic please. If you don't feel your advice is being valued here, there are plenty of threads to choose from.

[tojaz]

Jersey, You spend enough time watching these stories unfold from the outside where your not influenced by all the emotions at play, you start to pick up on the patterns of how these things play out. That's the point of these forums, to get advice from people who are not just living it, but have lived it and came out the other side. They have seen whats waiting around the corner and are trying to help you get ahead of the curve, even though sometimes the delivery leaves a bit to be desired, I hope your not totally dismissing what some of these other guys have to say. There's valuable information there.

 

Keeping that in mind, I'm going to remind you what I said about being on back burner status. I'm going to say that this recent contact was just her keeping tabs, letting her know that you'd still come when she whistled..... and you did, you marched to her door and basically told her you would be waiting as long as it takes. So she knows your there as a back up plan, she has no reason to worry about you, think about you, be concerned with you at all. She knows there is no risk of losing you.

 

Lets turn it around, it was only a few pages back that you were going out of your head wondering about her, why? Because she was NC with you! Think about it, you don't wonder where the dog is when he's out barking in the yard, you get concerned when things get quiet suddenly. If your not on the other end next time she yanks on the chain, she'll have some real thinking to do. That is what you want right?

 

Listen jersey, because I know this is a lot to deal with and even harder to put in practice. I've been reading sad stories here for almost 6 years, that's a lot of sad stories and in the ones that had happy endings, they always start with someone realizing they had something to lose, shes not going to have the opportunity to do that if your curled up on her porch waiting to be let in for the rest of your life.

 

TOJAZ

[JerseyFresh]

Jersey, You spend enough time watching these stories unfold from the outside where your not influenced by all the emotions at play, you start to pick up on the patterns of how these things play out. That's the point of these forums, to get advice from people who are not just living it, but have lived it and came out the other side. They have seen whats waiting around the corner and are trying to help you get ahead of the curve, even though sometimes the delivery leaves a bit to be desired, I hope your not totally dismissing what some of these other guys have to say. There's valuable information there.

 

Keeping that in mind, I'm going to remind you what I said about being on back burner status. I'm going to say that this recent contact was just her keeping tabs, letting her know that you'd still come when she whistled..... and you did, you marched to her door and basically told her you would be waiting as long as it takes. So she knows your there as a back up plan, she has no reason to worry about you, think about you, be concerned with you at all. She knows there is no risk of losing you.

 

Lets turn it around, it was only a few pages back that you were going out of your head wondering about her, why? Because she was NC with you! Think about it, you don't wonder where the dog is when he's out barking in the yard, you get concerned when things get quiet suddenly. If your not on the other end next time she yanks on the chain, she'll have some real thinking to do. That is what you want right?

 

Listen jersey, because I know this is a lot to deal with and even harder to put in practice. I've been reading sad stories here for almost 6 years, that's a lot of sad stories and in the ones that had happy endings, they always start with someone realizing they had something to lose, shes not going to have the opportunity to do that if your curled up on her porch waiting to be let in for the rest of your life.

 

TOJAZ

 

 

 

Thank you. that was a great response, honestly. I haven't contacted her again since the other day. I HAVE driven by... sorry that's the tough one for me. But, I have also been doing a lot of things for myself. I got an interview for a new career that would BLOW HER AWAY. shed be amazed. I've been working out. I even hung out with another girl last night.... I gotta be honest... it sucked haha. we didn't have sex or anything, but I just didn't "feel it" and kept thinking wow... 5 blocks away shes laying on MY couch with this douchebag.

 

 

Anyway, my plan is a new Mercedes.... for me. I was so busy paying all her bills and raising her kids for almost 2 years I was never getting myself anything. Now, its time for some new clothes and a new car.

[ConfusedHumanBeing]

Thank you. that was a great response, honestly. I that'shaven't contacted her again since the other day. I HAVE driven by... sorry that's the tough one for me. But, I have also been doing a lot of things for myself. I got an interview for a new career that would BLOW HER AWAY. shed be amazed. I've been working out. I even hung out with another girl last night.... I gotta be honest... it sucked haha. we didn't have sex or anything, but I just didn't "feel it" and kept thinking wow... 5 blocks away shes laying on MY couch with this douchebag.

 

 

Anyway, my plan is a new Mercedes.... for me. I was so busy paying all her bills and raising her kids for almost 2 years I was never getting myself anything. Now, its time for some new clothes and a new car.

 

Awesome! Keep that up. Go out and worry about you at this point because that is your main concern at the moment.

 

Just some tips: Do the new career for YOU not her. But it does seem like you are doing what should be done so great work. All the other stuff will be sorted out with time.

[Chin Up]

Personally, I find breakups to be the perfect time for all those big self improvements you have in mind, but couldn't find the time or motivation to accomplish. On one hand it's preferable to be a sad sack and just lay around depressed, but at some point you get sick of feeling that way and that's when things happen.

 

So good on you for heading in that direction. I hated working out again. HATED! But I realized it did help me feel less bummed out, released pent up anger, and I'd sleep a lot better for it. Then when you see the physical changes..ohhh yeahhh baby. Now I feel crummy when I miss a workout.

 

I hear ya on now having a lot more disposable income from being single. Blessing in disguise haha. Buy nice things for yourself only if you can afford them, and because they're truly for you. If you're doing these things to impress her with how lavish you now seem..well...I recommend watching "The Great Gatsby" and look how it turned out for him lol .

[JerseyFresh]

Thank you guys. Yeah... im trying here. It made me feel WORLDS better when she let slip that she checks my instagram and that she doesn't trust this guy yet.

 

 

It kind of let me know that I have a window to breathe and work on myself.

 

 

Let me ask you guys THIS..... be honest... all egos aside...

 

 

has anyone here gotten back with an ex and had to deal with them having had sex with someone else?

 

 

For me that's something that would be VERY hard to get over. I am a territorial man... "alpha male" or whatever the ****. and it would weigh on my mind constantly I think..... wondering if she still thinks about it or how it was... things like that...

 

 

IM just going on IF we get back together and its a few months from now.... its something I might have to deal with.

 

 

how do you get over something like that?

[frigginlost]

Thank you guys. Yeah... im trying here. It made me feel WORLDS better when she let slip that she checks my instagram and that she doesn't trust this guy yet.

 

Friendly advice: Try not to allow that to make you feel better. She may stop doing it...

 

has anyone here gotten back with an ex and had to deal with them having had sex with someone else?

 

Yes. Had an ex cheat on me with her ex.

 

For me that's something that would be VERY hard to get over. I am a territorial man... "alpha male" or whatever the ****. and it would weigh on my mind constantly I think..... wondering if she still thinks about it or how it was... things like that...

 

I can tell you right now, you are nowhere near the point where you would be able to get over something like that. It is without a doubt, the hardest thing you can imagine. Even though you think it is something you could do (and in time you can), you're not there yet. Even though she did not cheat on you, you are waaaay to emotionally involved and still have to process. It will happen, but it takes time.

 

 

IM just going on IF we get back together and its a few months from now.... its something I might have to deal with.

 

If the appropriate amount of time has passed, it's not really a big deal (you're seeking indifference). You accept it and move on.

 

 

how do you get over something like that?

 

Time and understanding.

[Diezel]

has anyone here gotten back with an ex and had to deal with them having had sex with someone else?

 

Yep, and honestly, it wasn't good.

 

And the worst part is you have no way of knowing whether she has done the deed or not, you just have to assume that "kissing and him sleeping on the couch" could just as well be sex.

[Simon Phoenix]

Thank you guys. Yeah... im trying here. It made me feel WORLDS better when she let slip that she checks my instagram and that she doesn't trust this guy yet.

 

 

It kind of let me know that I have a window to breathe and work on myself.

 

 

Let me ask you guys THIS..... be honest... all egos aside...

 

 

has anyone here gotten back with an ex and had to deal with them having had sex with someone else?

 

 

For me that's something that would be VERY hard to get over. I am a territorial man... "alpha male" or whatever the ****. and it would weigh on my mind constantly I think..... wondering if she still thinks about it or how it was... things like that...

 

 

IM just going on IF we get back together and its a few months from now.... its something I might have to deal with.

 

 

how do you get over something like that?

 

Personally, if we're broken up, I don't really give a s--t if they've slept with someone else. I don't consider myself an alpha (I think the alpha/beta stuff is dumb in general) but I don't consider myself a wallflower either. It's none of my business what they are doing, just like it's none of their business what I'm doing. I mean, one of the first things I used to do with bad breakups was try to hook up with someone else, so it'd be awfully hypocritical for me to hold it against them if they do the same thing. I also tend to separate the act of sex from the feeling of love and view it more as a carnal release than some sort of emotional event. I'd be more upset about an ex taking long walks on the beach or going on intimate weekend trips than I would about her having a little bit of fun and having sex with some random.

 

The way I see it is that, for the most part, exes slept with someone else before your relationship happened. We don't get upset about that (at least, most don't), so why get upset about something they did when you weren't together? If they are hooking up with people while you are together, I'll wash my hands of them permanently with no remorse. But when you're single and they're single? All's fair.

[tojaz]

Let me ask you guys THIS..... be honest... all egos aside...

has anyone here gotten back with an ex and had to deal with them having had sex with someone else?

 

Yup, I'm a jealous sort of guy so it definitely wasn't the most fun I've ever had. Worked it out though, and the relationship lasted a good long while.

 

I know your the guy that likes to know whats going on, but sometimes your better off leaving some things in the dark. Should you get the opportunity to try again with her, your going to have enough on your plate without adding jealousy into the mix.

 

Think of it as a new relationship and not an extension of the old, what is past stays in the past and you both start with a clean slate history wise. That can be a good idea in general actually, once the things that lead to the break up have been addressed.

 

TOJAZ

[JerseyFresh]

I don't even know what kind of mood im in the last 2 days.... I go from crying and sobbing begging God to bring her back to me..... to getting all pumped up like "**** her... im going to be awesome and she'll ****ing hate herself for leaving me" lol its pretty funny to watch.

 

 

feeling a bit ****ty right this second.... every time its night time and I know hes on his way over there soon I get really down.

[ConfusedHumanBeing]

I don't even know what kind of mood im in the days.... I go from crying and sobbing begging God to bring her back to me..... to getting all pumped up like "**** her... im going to be awesome and she'll ****ing hate herself for leaving me" lol its pretty funny to watch.

 

 

feeling a bit ****ty right this second.... every time its night time and I know hes on his way over there soon I get really down.

 

Yeah you'll do a lot of that. Its totally normal. The more time passes, the less the pain. One day, you'll realize you hate feeling like this and you will then start to move on.

 

Its a grind, but you got this...

[JerseyFresh]

Yeah you'll do a lot of that. Its totally normal. The more time passes, the less the pain. One day, you'll realize you hate feeling like this and you will then start to move on.

 

Its a grind, but you got this...

 

 

 

thank you brother. truce? (did I spell that right)

[tojaz]

I don't even know what kind of mood im in the last 2 days.... I go from crying and sobbing begging God to bring her back to me..... to getting all pumped up like "**** her... im going to be awesome and she'll ****ing hate herself for leaving me" lol its pretty funny to watch.

 

 

feeling a bit ****ty right this second.... every time its night time and I know hes on his way over there soon I get really down.

 

They call it a roller coaster for a reason Jersey. Up, down, loopty loop, repeat. Glad to see your letting yourself get angry as well. That's actually a good thing here.

 

Tojaz

[JerseyFresh]

I don't really have any updates. I haven't spoken to her or attempted to. I did notice that he hasn't been there the last 2 nights. which is amazing to me. i'm sure they'll be together all weekend while she has off though lol. but.... i'm SLOWLY accepting that hes going to be there and there's nothing I can do about it besides dive headfirst into the bigger goal and hope it works.

[Simon Phoenix]

I don't really have any updates. I haven't spoken to her or attempted to. I did notice that he hasn't been there the last 2 nights. which is amazing to me. i'm sure they'll be together all weekend while she has off though lol. but.... i'm SLOWLY accepting that hes going to be there and there's nothing I can do about it besides dive headfirst into the bigger goal and hope it works.

 

I feel like a broken record, but you have to stop driving by and doing recon. It's only holding you back. Right now you are a drug addict, and driving by is basically getting you hits. You'd be best to assume that he's there every night (even if he isn't), which will get you desensitized to the idea. Then you can continue to move forward, decompress, and improve for whatever happens next.

 

But seriously, all these drive-bys do is hold you back, even if you get a bit of a rush from them at the time you do them. It's a cheap sugar high.

[LovelyDaze]

I don't really have any updates. I haven't spoken to her or attempted to. I did notice that he hasn't been there the last 2 nights. which is amazing to me. i'm sure they'll be together all weekend while she has off though lol. but.... i'm SLOWLY accepting that hes going to be there and there's nothing I can do about it besides dive headfirst into the bigger goal and hope it works.

 

As many of the LS members advised, it would be really good for you to stop the drive-bys. They are doing nothing but keeping you stuck in idle. What you want is to feel relaxed in the heart, mind, and spirit again. I've read all your thread page by page and I feel so bad for you. You need to feel you are worth more than just to be a "guy-in-queue" for your ex.

 

I really feel bad that you told her you would wait for her to begin with because she doesn't appreciate all that you are as her one and only...you are just the ex she knows she CAN get back, toss out when a new man comes along, get back after that one, toss out when another new man comes, so on and so forth.

 

Don't sell yourself so short.

[QuantumofBoris]

I stumbled across this thread as I was trying to make sense of my own situation, and have spent the last couple of hours reading it from beginning to end.

It has at times ranged from being f*cking hilarious to heart rending, and OP - you seem during the course of the whole thing to have started to regain your composure.

A little bit of mine - I sent some crappy email about a week and half ago, pouring my heart out - then woke the next morning and sent a follow up which just said "sorry about that, was feeling a bit overly sentimental" - I then had to meet her the next day to exchange some items we had left at each others houses. This was after a 7 year RS - I asked if she saw the emails.

She replied "yes, thank god you sent the 2nd one. Those are the sort of emails you write but don't send and just hit delete" - fair point

But - seriously, stop the drive bys - they just send you nuts. And I am glad that you seemed to have dropped the video idea.

I could be a lot more blunt about some of the other stuff you have said, but I think it's all already been said, but thanks to everyone on here, especially Ducttape for the Fabio pictures...kinda made my night!

[tojaz]

Hey Jersey, I'm not going to rehash what everyone said regarding the drive-bys (but cut it out!) Just lookin for an update, how's it going???

[QuantumofBoris]

real shame JF has gone quiet on this - I was gripped to this thread like a thriller

 

JerseyFresh - hope all well, hope you didn't send that video

[JerseyFresh]

HEY EVERYONEEEEE!!!! I"M BACKKKKKK!!!!! haha

 

 

first reason that I haven't updated anyone is because I honestly forgot what this website was called and I had deleted every email I had gotten. Part of my "new me" procedure was to clean out all the old emails.... that includes emails from girls... porn sites etc etc. haha.

 

 

Secondly, I've been working like a dog. lots of shifts and saving up money.

 

 

 

 

SOOOOO..... here's the update.

 

 

Against your guys advice... I went ahead and gave her the video on Wednesday night just a few days ago. I had just finalized the whole thing the night before and I sort of felt like I had nothing to lose. We hadn't been speaking at all and she seemed to be doing fine. I also have been doing better though. Working out, working, saving money, bettering myself in many ways. Getting ready for my new career.

 

 

SO.... the moment you've all been waiting for.....

 

 

SHE LOVED THE VIDEO. I MEAN LOVED IT. I know you guys probably don't believe me.... I Have many texts and emails that can prove it. Now, that's not to say she came running back and jumped into my arms.

 

 

Here's how it went.

 

 

I had to be to work at 7. I asked her the night before if she could make it home a few minutes earlier from work so I could drop something off. She was very nice and said yes. She was running ate though and only got back at about 6:50. I helped her walk the kids in but she wouldn't let me come in the apartment (which is so funny cause I paid for the ****ing thing for a year. everything in it is mine) which I equate to the fact that shes trying to respect her new "boyfriend" which she says hes not actually her boyfriend yet.

 

 

So we stand outside the door talking for a minute. I ask her if she sees herself with this guy forever.... or if hes just someone shes passing time with. Because I've always been her forever guy. Her response was "i do really like him... hes like the nicest guy I've ever met" So I told her... everyone is nice in the beginning. She said "i know, it takes a good 3 months to see someone's true colors" So I told her to be careful and just protect herself and the kids.

 

 

I gave her a bag with a decorative box in it which I wrapped. In the box I had decorated the iinside of the lid with quotes and pictures of us. Inside the box I put 2 small bottles of merlot (our favorite) a small wrapped bag of tissues. one envelope with a card in it that read "YES" and another that read "NO" each one had a letter in it in response to whatever her answer would be. ANd one letter that was a "follow up" to the video. In the letter I showed her PROOF of all the changes that I had made. CHanged my phone number. Changed all the passwords to my facebook and instagram and put those passwords in the envelope (with a note that I would change them after 2 days if I hadn't heard from her) I showed her my interview date for my new career and my paycheck from all the hours I've been working. And the video was EPIC. It was 38 minutes long!! damn near a movie!! All the pictures of us at 15 years old all the way up to now and stories between each one and an explanation of where we went wrong, how we went wrong and how it can be fixed. All of our songs played on the video.

 

 

So I left and went to work. 8 rolled by... 9 rolled by.... 10 rolled by.... 11 rolled by..... almost midnight on my break I was so pissed off that I hadn't heard at least a "thank you" I was almost losing my ****.

 

 

11:57 I got a text from her. She said "that was the sweetest thing anyones ever done for me. I loved it. I watched it 5 times through and I couldn't stop crying"

 

 

So I was jumping for joy. I'm not supposed to text at work but I kept sneaking off having conversations with her. As the conversation went on I got less and less hopeful. She sort of started talking in a "past tense" way... like "we had some great memories" yada yada. So I was like wow ok so you're choosing him.... I guess that's your answer. I asked her "how ddid the video make you feel" Her response was "i am not going to tell you how it made me feel because you'll hold it against me or try and start trouble" (I cant lie, im the type to see this guy and be like "yeah well she was crying over my video and misses me bitch!!") lol however juvenile that may be.

 

 

She said "i'm not choosing anyone. I just am going with the flow with this guy and seeing where it goes. I think hes a good guy. He seems really sweet" So I started just telling her every relationship is sweet.... its been 4 weeks what could possibly go wrong in 4 weeks. Anyway.... after a sort of "argument" which I think made me slide backwards from the good the video had done she went to sleep. (he wasn't there that night which was cool)

 

 

So the following morning (yesterday morning) I called her when I got home from work. I told her that she could at least tell me how the video made her feel and that I haven't said a WORD to her or this guy in 4 weeks besides the first night and that I wouldn't do anything to **** up her situation. She repeated that she wasn't going to tell me. And basically was mad because she said she didn't have time and was getting ready for work and taking the kids to school (it was like 7 am)

 

 

So we hung up..... I got so pissed I sent her a long email. In the email I reminded her of all of HER mistakes that she had made because she HATESSSS admitting her wrongs. She likes everyone to think shes the victim and that me and her ex husband are both horrible people and shes just an angel that was done wrong. I was very blunt in the letter without PUTTING HER DOWN or calling her names which I used to do and she hated it. I sort of just laid it all out in a mature way. Then I told her that at least I was man enough to admit my wrong doings and take action to change them and I've shown it as proof. No response.

 

 

So..... I went to work last night at 7. At around 11:30 my phone rings and its a blocked number. I can't talk on the phone at work so I didn't pick up. Two seconds later my email alert goes off..... an email from her. 2 seconds after that my facebook alert goes off.... she has had me blocked on facebook for 3 months... she unblocked me to send me a message.

 

 

The email was basically saying how much she loved the video and that she just watched it again. Saying that she "doesn't care what I think of her that she knows shes a good person" in reference to my email. And that she just doesn't think she can ever trust me if she got back with me (I never cheated but I used to **** every girl on earth so she thinks i'm still that guy I was when I was 20)

 

 

So... then she basically starts going into that she misses me but just doesn't think it can work after all this drama and that she would never trust me. That she just thinks this guy is really nice and that it could go somewhere. So I told her that I have showed all the proof in the world that I have changed and that if she could just give me one date to prove it... and if that worked maybe a second date...

 

 

 

 

she didn't say no!!! She said "i don't know..." So I flirted with her a bit... I got 2 REALLY good laughs out of her by referencing something from our past. I told her I was working really hard and that I didn't want to get in trouble so I had to get back. Then I said "cmon... one date... no sex, no cell phones... just you me some wine and a view of the city" she said ... "i don't know... im not sure" I told her I had a break in 20 minutes and asked if I could stop by for a hug... her response.... "not tonight. im tired" I asked "is it because hes there" And she said "no he's not here" (drove by on break. he wasn't there)

 

 

SHE DIDNT SAY NO.

 

 

So I got off work at 7 am.... I ran to the store real quick and bought a single rose. I drove to her apartment quick and cleaned off all the snow and ice from the windows. I put the rose in the windshield wiper and I left. 40 minutes later she texted me and asked if I had cleaned her car of. I said yes. She said "thank you, but you didn't have to do that" I said no problem, a lady shouldn't have to do that in the cold. I told her to have a good weekend and that was it.

 

 

I"M GLAD I GAVE HER THE VIDEO. She unblocked me from facebook now and has been in more contact with me in the 2 days since I gave it to her than in an entire month. I am 100% going to play it cool now and step back and let her come to me..... so I AM using your guys technique in terms of no contact AT THIS POINT. but I had to remind her that we had WAY WAY more good times than bad. And I think it worked.

 

 

you guys don't have to believe me if you don't want to. As I said I have all the proof in the world, but you guys would just say that I made it up or whatever. And i'm certainly not going to post her facebook name or anything in here. I don't know what kind of weirdos are online lol.

 

 

So....... lets just say that you guys believe me... which you should because I don't care enough to lie just to impress faceless people I'll never meet..... At this point.... no contact is the way to go for SURE right?

[Simon Phoenix]

Oh dear lord. So you are basically trying to harass her into going on a date with you right now? That's how it reads. You really need to back the heck off. If the video did work (I don't think it did, I think if anything it was a quick trip down memory lane to make her feel better and make her realize how you're still hooked), you are ruining that effect by continuing after her like a rabid dog. The fact that she didn't say no doesn't mean she's saying yes (even though she said no to you stopping by to give her a hug, that came off as a bit creepy, no offense) -- it could mean that she was trying to avoid a scene, or it could be a way to keep you hooked in the background.

 

I do believe you that she liked the video, but I don't believe she liked it for the reasons you want her to like it. I know I'm sounding negative and I anticipate you coming back with insults, but that didn't read as positive as all. That read as you putting on a frenetic full-court press.

 

I don't believe you lied about what you wrote at all, but I certainly don't share the perspective that you have on the situation. And I'm not sure you realize what No Contact is. No Contact means that if she messages you, you don't answer. It means not following her on social media. And, once again, it means to stop driving by her house. But I do agree with you that you need to back off.

[mtnbiker3000]

Wow. Just... WOW...

[JerseyFresh]

Oh dear lord. So you are basically trying to harass her into going on a date with you right now? That's how it reads. You really need to back the heck off. If the video did work (I don't think it did, I think if anything it was a quick trip down memory lane to make her feel better and make her realize how you're still hooked), you are ruining that effect by continuing after her like a rabid dog. The fact that she didn't say no doesn't mean she's saying yes -- it could mean that she was trying to avoid a scene, or it could be a way to keep you hooked in the background.

 

I do believe you that she liked the video, but I don't believe she liked it for the reasons you want her to like it. I know I'm sounding negative and I anticipate you coming back with insults, but that didn't read as positive as all. That read as you putting on a frenetic full-court press.

 

I don't believe you lied about what you wrote there at all, but I certainly don't share the perspective that you have on the situation. And I'm not sure you realize what No Contact is. No Contact means that if she messages you, you don't answer. It means not following her on social media. And, once again, it means to stop driving by her house. But I do agree with you that you need to back off.

 

 

 

Lol jesus... you guys just never have any positive reinforcement. The fact that 24 hours later SHE unblocked me.... CALLED ME... MESSAGED ME... and then tried to tell me why she doesn't think it would work doesn't make you think shes at least debating it? She ignored me for days and weeks when i'd text her before. Now she felt the need to call me 24 hours later? And when I asked to stop for a hug she said "not tonight" Or the fact that I asked if we could go on a date and she didn't say NO? there was no "scene" to be had... I was at work and she was at home. She could have just said no. And then she didn't block me again..... she's kept open the lines of communication. Which I will not utilize. I'm going to wait on her for this one. I did tell her in the video that I'm going to start dating again at this point. The video wasn't like "honey I love you, ill wait forever" lol it was like hey im here... I changed... we have something special... now grow up or lose it.