bgirl Posted March 29, 2005 Share Posted March 29, 2005 Not sure what to do...... My husband and I recently had a baby boy. He is almost 7 weeks old. We always wanted to have a family and when we first met we talked about having a big family and spending time etc... He works two jobs. One is full time M-F 9-5 and the other is part-time Tues 6-10, Sat Sun 8-5. The part time job is the one he loves doing and the fulltime job is just for the money. However, he said that if he ever had a family he would quit the weekend job to be w/ the family. Well, we were not expecting it to happen so soon but I became preg, (on the shot too) and he does not want to quit the job. On top of that he will want to hang w/ his boys and go drinking (which I hate) once and awhile. I just know that with me being alone w/ the child all the time and then him going out I will get upset. We have had several conversations about it and he thinks that if I love him I should support him. I do love him and my son but I feel like he should give up that job to spend quality time w/ us. He says he will come right home after work to give me a break or whatever but that is not the point. I want us to spend family time together like he said we would if I had his child. I go back and forth.. I want to make him happy but then I will be sad, depressed, lonely and miserable. He wo Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky Dog Posted March 30, 2005 Share Posted March 30, 2005 If you make him give up doing what he loves (the part-time job) he may be a miserable, resntful grouch when he is home. It's a tough situation with no easy answers. I would give it some time to settle and not make any rash decisions right away. Link to post Share on other sites
Sal Paradise Posted April 3, 2005 Share Posted April 3, 2005 He works two jobs. One is full time M-F 9-5 and the other is part-time Tues 6-10, Sat Sun 8-5. The part time job is the one he loves doing and the fulltime job is just for the money. However, he said that if he ever had a family he would quit the weekend job to be w/ the family I think making him quit a job he loves could cause him to resent you. I think you should try talking him (if you haven't already) and perhaps giving it time. On top of that he will want to hang w/ his boys and go drinking (which I hate) once and awhile. If its only once in a while I don't see what the big deal is. They're are his friends and I assume he's known them for quite a while? Why do chicks always have a problem with a guy hanging out with his friends? To me its usually a sign of insecurity. I do love him and my son but I feel like he should give up that job to spend quality time w/ us. He says he will come right home after work to give me a break or whatever but that is not the point. I want us to spend family time together like he said we would if I had his child. Its a tough situation, there is no real wrong or right. I think the key is that he loves the weekend job more than main source of employment. Perhaps you should encourage him to pursue the weekend job full time and drop the other job. I don't know the full situation so its hard to give employment advice when so many things factor into it, finances, availability etc... I would highly suggest talking to him. You're not wrong for feeling alone or depressed and tackling this now and trying to work it out and or at least opening up door of communication on the issue is important. Better to do it now before it leads to something that may not beable to be fixed. I wouldn't freak out too much. It sounds like you both love each other. Talk to him. Thats where it all starts. And let him know you want his happiness as well. Try to come up with a compromise. Link to post Share on other sites
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