GettingOver Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 (edited) I decided to share my story with everyone so that OW that are now hurting could see some light at the end of the tunnel. Some of you may remember something from my story, but long story short, I was the OW for 3,5 yeras - on and off. I tried to break it off 3 times. I moved countries and now live in the same country where my exMM lives. But it did not help me to have him... I tried to do NC several times as many people recommended. But I discovered it was not my way. After the 3rd attempt to break up I had a rebound relationship and it did not work out - first of all I was not ready and this was a wrong man for me... My thoughts about exMM were back to me and got even stronger. So I contacted him again and we started talking. We even saw each other a couple of times, and it helped me to realize how little he actually cares about me. He would be happy to have me back as a mistress, but I did not let it happen. In the meantime I started doing online dating to distract myself from getting emotionaly dependant on exMM again. I cannot say how open I was for a relationship, but the 3rd guy I met made me feel comfortable. He also has his story and we decided to take things slow, BUT. I can like and care about another man without comparing him to exMM the whole time. Moreover - I realized that exMM was NOT the best man on the planet for me . I live my life without thinking of exMM. Sometimes I see him on Skype and i feel... NOTHING. Recently I found a perfume bottle on my friend's table - it was the same one that exMM used. This smell would always make me tremble. I smelled it - and I did not tremble - it was just a nice memory. I don't talk to exMM regularly, but I know that I could and I would be fine. I just wanted to share this because I know how many OW are hurting and do not see the light at the end of the tunnel. But YOU CAN SET YOURSELF FREE. Just do what your gut tells you to do. Try to live without him, try seeing other men - maybe there would be one for you there. Maybe it will be another experience, but you'll know that you've tried. What I can tell for now is that I broke up with exMM 3 times, after the 3 time I jumped into a R that did not work for me either. But it was an investment into getting over exMM. After it ended I missed exMM, but I kept on trying to see other men. And one day I met a guy that I liked even more than exMM. We are only dating and maybe it will not lead anywhere, BUT my heart is not suffering any longer crying for exMM. I want to send a hug to all the OW out there and tell them that your life can get back to normal again! Edited January 14, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Paragraphs and link to first thread on topic 10 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 Thanks for sharing your outcome. In my world I call that 'finished business'. It's a great place to be. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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