Are we just too saturated by sex nowadays?

[Danda]

I think it almost always depends on the person. I mean, in more ancient cultures there were naked statues, people in paintings were often naked, etc. Lots of ancient religions had very strong fertility themes.

 

In my perception the problem with modern sexual-ization of things is that sex is no longer viewed as a sacred part of nature, an act of great responsibility, something special shared between two humans, something that requires a great deal of empathy and respect, etc.

 

Rather, a lot of sexual material in the modern Western World is very jaded, disrespectful, degrading, pumped with rage/hostility, expressed as a control thing, etc.

 

To me sex is the ultimate spiritual connection with a person. It encompasses the emotional (what separates humans from the rest of nature), the primal (the side of us that is inescapably from the natural world), and then something that is still so mysterious to us that we make silly fools of ourselves trying to articulate it yet rarely understanding it truly. (I think this is why you can ask 20 different people what "being in love" means and get 20 different answers. There are some things for which there are no words, in my perception, but things that can be felt none the less.)

 

When we take something like that and twist it into what we have today, I mean I think it's no wonder that it winds up feeling like decay.

 

Of course this doesn't mean that I never take sex casually, I certainly have. It's not like I'm some shining special exception when it comes to how a culture can influence a person's mind/feelings.

 

But when I sit back and just observe from-the-outside-looking-in so to speak, that is what I see. Not that our culture is hyper-sexualized, but that it's taken on a darker, toxic edge to many things (sex included), and that is what is hurting our species.

[dichotomy]

Your right.... when one looks at the media - one see sex and sexual behavior -all the time, easy, fun, amazing, casual, mind blowing hot sex, everywhere........except among committed married people. God help us if they portrayed loving committed couples as sexually hot.

 

People underestimate how much people emulate what they see portrayed and think its the way to behave or feel.

Edited January 15, 2015 by dichotomy

[preraph]

You only have to look at the way the U.S. views breast feeding to see the repression. It stems from everything you mentioned. This is absolutely shocking to people in other countries.

 

So you view breast feeding as sexual and that people who would rather not share in that intimate moment are repressed sexually? I think it's because not everyone wants to feel they're still at home or having dinner in a nursery because they want a break from it and also can see 101 other options that would not include doing something very private in public.

[xxoo]

I, too, think of breastfeeding when these conversations come up. Breastfeeding is 100% NOT sexual, but attitudes toward breastfeeding vs. attitudes toward sexual imagery of women's breasts always seems so backwards to me.

 

Women have been asked to cover up or leave a mall when breastfeeding, in the same mall where VS has enormous posters of women in a skimpy bra facing out toward the walkway. It's absurd. Breast are ok to be displayed in a sexy manner for the purpose of commerce, but obscene when feeding a baby.

[CALOVELY]

So you view breast feeding as sexual and that people who would rather not share in that intimate moment are repressed sexually? I think it's because not everyone wants to feel they're still at home or having dinner in a nursery because they want a break from it and also can see 101 other options that would not include doing something very private in public.

 

I do not see breast feeding as sexual, others do and that is why they have a problem with it. Having dinner? That is what the baby is trying to do. It is fascinating to me how this is sexualized though.

 

OP, sorry to get off topic.

[pteromom]

I don't know about saturated, but our society is out-of-balance in the importance it places on sex.

 

People have always had sex, and I am sure that sex has always been a big motivator for men to marry, but they also wanted wives for building a home together, having children, having a partner, etc.

 

Sex was something people did in the privacy of their homes, and a woman didn't throw her sexuality out in people's faces like now.

 

Now - especially with the younger generation - it seems sex is the #1 most important thing. It doesn't matter if a woman is a good person, loving, sweet, etc. She better be good in bed, or she's not worth it. And she better be shaved and be "neat" down there too. And willing to do whatever the guy wants.

 

The porn and open sexuality of our society has some benefits, and it is nice that people can do what they want to do, but at the same time it sets up some unrealistic expectations when it comes to sex and relationships.

 

How many marriages in the past do you think ended due to sexual compatibility? Would someone have even known that they were unsatisfied, since there was nothing to compare it to (in their own experience as well as what they witnessed?)

[TheGuard13]

I find this whole “porn makes men think this or that” thing ridiculous.

The existence of porn does not set unrealistic expectations about sex.

 

 

IGNORANCE does.

 

If you are a person who is ignorant enough to believe that what you see in a “film production of sex” is what sex is…at a certain point in life, that’s on you. Just like it’s on you if you believe that life happens the way it does in the movies. Eventually most rational adults consider these things.

 

Oy, the generalizing.

 

 

 

All men do not assume that sex is about just sex. And there have always been men who prefer it as a simple act VS some deep emotional experience. Porn is not the only cause of this.

 

And sure, plenty of men (and women) see certain sex acts in porn and want to try it. But how is that really any different than seeing something else you’d want to do anywhere else?

 

 

Nor is it the most important thing for everyone these days, or every young person.

 

 

And the idea that no one today values sex beyond “fun” is absurd.

 

 

In terms of the media…sex sells, and has always sold. The idea of sex being used to shock and tittilate is not new.

 

In terms of marriages...sexual dissatisfaction was around long before porn.

 

And I have no issue with wanting sex to be a loving, respectful thing, but I do take issue with people seem to look down at those who might see sex as, among other things, casual fun and a simple physical entertainment as "getting it wrong". Not everyone feels the same way about things that you do. That doesn’t make their feelings wrong. Different things work for different people.

[hotpotato]

I find this whole “porn makes men think this or that” thing ridiculous.

The existence of porn does not set unrealistic expectations about sex.

 

 

IGNORANCE does.

 

If you are a person who is ignorant enough to believe that what you see in a “film production of sex” is what sex is…at a certain point in life, that’s on you. Just like it’s on you if you believe that life happens the way it does in the movies. Eventually most rational adults consider these things.

 

 

Well, I guess then most guys I've met are utterly ignorant lol

 

I've met one man in my life who didn't view sex as mostly physical. Just one. And I've met quite a few men.

I don't see the point of sugarcoating. Sex is mostly about the physical most of the time.

 

As with much of human nature, I think tech exacerbates rather than creates.

Edited January 16, 2015 by hotpotato