Author Kaiten Posted January 17, 2015 Author Share Posted January 17, 2015 He absolutely didn't want his strict church friends knowing that he plays games that involve killing God or playing the role of Jesus. However I don't think he was justified in lashing out at the OP. If he wants to be a hypocrite and pretend to be one thing while secretly doing another then that's his problem. He can't expect everyone else to help him maintain his image. I was thinking this but didn't want to say it. It did seem extremely hypocritical to be mad at me for telling Lisa that I enjoyed a game that she didn't just because she might assume that he also enjoys the game - which he does! Link to post Share on other sites
mrs rubble Posted January 17, 2015 Share Posted January 17, 2015 that's interesting. I had told my friend recently that I had always felt a little jealous of his relationship with the church. It was something that I just could never attain (because I was unwilling to behave/submit to them). I admitted that to him. When I told him that, he actually lashed out on me that time too, saying that I hadn't learned how to be a true friend - an individual while still being part of a community. (Not as easy as he makes it sound in a church in the South) As far as Lisa goes, she is actually a person I do not hate. But I hate seeing my friends and others not stand up to all these overly-religious types in their lives. It kinda hurts me when kids tell me about how their parents impose so much on them through their churches; trying to get their kids to be 'holy'. I actually hate to see Lisa commenting like that on a friends photo like a religious lioness getting ready to pounce on him. That makes me upset just typing about it. I won't even say that I want to see the church crumble to the earth. I just want to hold my ground against them and respect what they believe. No insults. No attacking character. The easiest way to stop the insults and attacks is to smile and say "I'll leave it to God to judge, thanks for your opinion." Link to post Share on other sites
CC12 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 Can he really get mad at me for them looking down on him because he secretly likes a game series that they disapprove of? They didn't necessarily disapprove of the game until you described in detail how certain themes go completely against their religion. Those women were already being judgmental about a silly skull necklace and I think you kind of threw fuel onto that fire. And it was definitely the wrong audience. I mean, you knew they were super conservative. If you had thought it through before posting, I think you could have guessed that it might not go over well. And that's giving you the benefit of the doubt and assuming you didn't intend to get into a religious argument/discussion or to shock Lisa because you don't like her very much, or to make your friend look bad. I don't think you intended anything by your comments, I just think that you were excited to share your knowledge and to brag a bit. But you can see how it could be interpreted. I do think your friend reacted poorly. You are right, he could have just said, "I didn't know about any of that." On the other hand, you could have just said, "I'm sorry about that comment" and then been done with it. I know you said you apologized, but when you follow up an apology by saying, "But what REALLY made you mad?" or "I don't think I did anything wrong" that sort of negates your apology and prolongs the argument. What would it have hurt you to just say, "I'm sorry for my comment"? He's the one feeling hurt/betrayed/wronged. Sometimes it's better to say sorry rather than to argue your point and be proven right. I hope this isn't what ended your friendship, because that would be a real shame. It was a dumb fight over a dumb Facebook comment regarding a dumb video game and I've typed too many dumb words about it already. Just be friends again if this was your only problem with the friendship. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 (edited) that's interesting. I had told my friend recently that I had always felt a little jealous of his relationship with the church. It was something that I just could never attain (because I was unwilling to behave/submit to them). I admitted that to him. When I told him that, he actually lashed out on me that time too, saying that I hadn't learned how to be a true friend - an individual while still being part of a community. (Not as easy as he makes it sound in a church in the South) As far as Lisa goes, she is actually a person I do not hate. But I hate seeing my friends and others not stand up to all these overly-religious types in their lives. It kinda hurts me when kids tell me about how their parents impose so much on them through their churches; trying to get their kids to be 'holy'. I actually hate to see Lisa commenting like that on a friends photo like a religious lioness getting ready to pounce on him. That makes me upset just typing about it. I won't even say that I want to see the church crumble to the earth. I just want to hold my ground against them and respect what they believe. No insults. No attacking character. I understand what you are saying.......I am actually religious and am part of a pretty strict church......the thing is my church is accepting of differences for the most part..in evry church you hav eunaccepting people...they just dotn show it...... .i have friends who are athiests.....they bag me out sometimes...i give as good as i get..... but if they attack the church....i defend..i dont take it as good natured ribbing......or teasing about me and celibacy for example, if they attack the church or make fun of the others in the church....they are my friends and like any friends...i am loyal..if it is cruel or not light hearted mirth......i will let them know they have taken it too far and not to go there if they value my friendship....at all........ they will respect what i respect.....as i respect them and their beliefs........fi they value me which they seem to ...they stop.... maybe he is a little defensive because you are not the only one who has said things to him....maybe he feels a little on the outer if he is a new member to the church....and feels his place or standing in the church is unstable..he is still trying to fidn his place and feel at ease.......he sounds a little insecure kaiten..thats my guesstimate... .my suggestion would be to tell him you want him to be happy if the church makes him happy so be it...thats friendship...but he also has to give some effort to the friendship as well.........i hope you work it out kaiten...best wishes....deb Edited January 18, 2015 by todreaminblue Link to post Share on other sites
Blade96 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 He got mad because he had to hide the fact he likes a game that "church" disapproves of. and you blew his cover That worries me more. If they would hate on him (and then he hates on you cause of it) because he likes a game, are they true friends? I think not. I think he is slightly brainwashed by this "church" It's what they often do. He might be becoming one of them. I'd be careful if I were you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 I asked him if he was so concerned about his image that he would completely deny on FB what he enjoys doing in his spare time. IMO, if he was so concerned about his image, he never would have posted a picture of a video game character with skulls around its neck. He got snatched up a knot by those two chicks and now he embarrassed himself. You didn't. If he hadn't posted the picture, none of this drama would even be happening. He is too afraid to stand in his truth and take his butt whippin' for it. That's what this is all about. Link to post Share on other sites
Bellaisa Posted January 20, 2015 Share Posted January 20, 2015 Ahhhh religion. Well, you knew that it would probably make those old women lose respect for him or get pissed off at him or pray for him - or whatever religious people do when things are not 'right' in their mind. Or at least you would have if you thought about what you were saying. Doesn't matter if you knew everything about it. That's not a reason to talk like that to church people who would obviously be offended. Respecting everyone and how they believe is important for peace when religion is involved. Talking about killing god is not respect. Common sense. Link to post Share on other sites
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