jake2495 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 hi My ex said she loves me when we broke up, strage right? she also said that she is 99% sure we will end up back together, she even promised. and then made me promise i would hold her to it even though she wanted to break up to let her hair down. how should i look at this? Link to post Share on other sites
towardthefuture Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 hi My ex said she loves me when we broke up, strage right? she also said that she is 99% sure we will end up back together, she even promised. and then made me promise i would hold her to it even though she wanted to break up to let her hair down. how should i look at this? My gut reaction is she wants to let her hair down onto another guy's crotch and then go back to you like it's all ok. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jake2495 Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 My gut reaction is she wants to let her hair down onto another guy's crotch and then go back to you like it's all ok. thats what i thought! but she said that she wouldnt do anything she just wanted to be able to have the option to. Link to post Share on other sites
towardthefuture Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 thats what i thought! but she said that she wouldnt do anything she just wanted to be able to have the option to. Lol. Tell her you're 100% sure you'll never get back together. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 hi My ex said she loves me when we broke up, strage right? she also said that she is 99% sure we will end up back together, she even promised. and then made me promise i would hold her to it even though she wanted to break up to let her hair down. how should i look at this? With a look of utter contempt. Here's what she means: "Hi, I'm breaking up with you! I'm off to screw every other man-jack I can, let my hair down, open my legs, live the life fantastic - then, I'll be back to good ol' dependable you, so you sit there like a good boy, on the back-burner. You're my second option, my fall-back guy, but of course, you'll do as I ask, because you're desperate, needy, clingy, dependent and I can count on you to be my little doormat, and wait for me until I grow tired of letting my hair down! seeyabye!!" I'd be seriously tempted to tell her to go to hell, and go total, complete, non-negotiable, non-reversible No Contact. I definitely suggest you should do that. No more questions, comments or queries from you are necessary. That's it and all of it. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jake2495 Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 she also said that she was sure shed regret it, wanted me as a best friend, would never do anything with anyone else as me and her hadnt really done much (rvrn though wed been going out for 2 years) as she couldnt without thinking of me... Link to post Share on other sites
SycamoreCircle Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 Promises written in water. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
towardthefuture Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 she also said that she was sure shed regret it, wanted me as a best friend, would never do anything with anyone else as me and her hadnt really done much (rvrn though wed been going out for 2 years) as she couldnt without thinking of me... All of those things reinforce the subtext evancescentworld laid out in the post before yours. "Be my best friend", for instance, means "You're a sweetie but I want to get drunk and get plowed by a hot guy at a club" "Would never do anything with anyone else" ------ I've got a bridge to sell you buddy. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jake2495 Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 i guess. i just know her so well and she said that when she was with me, n the smae room doing things, she didnt ever want it to end and she couldnt do it so we kinda just saidit was mutual even though she instigated it Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 she also said that she was sure shed regret it, wanted me as a best friend, would never do anything with anyone else as me and her hadnt really done much (rvrn though wed been going out for 2 years) as she couldnt without thinking of me... Hah!! So you're ALREADY 'friend-zoned'!! Boy, she's cool and quick, isn't she?! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 hi My ex said she loves me when we broke up, strage right? she also said that she is 99% sure we will end up back together, she even promised. and then made me promise i would hold her to it even though she wanted to break up to let her hair down. how should i look at this? You are plan B. No contact. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jake2495 Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 Hah!! So you're ALREADY 'friend-zoned'!! Boy, she's cool and quick, isn't she?! yeah i guess i am! we were friends before so no reason i cant get out of it again! Link to post Share on other sites
towardthefuture Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 i guess. i just know her so well and she said that when she was with me, n the smae room doing things, she didnt ever want it to end and she couldnt do it so we kinda just saidit was mutual even though she instigated it Man, this girl has got you wrapped around your little finger. No wonder she broke up with you, you are her subordinate. Tell her to get lost, then never talk to her again. But tell her to get lost like a man not like a crying girlfriend. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jake2495 Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 defo no worth waiting for then! i haven contacted her since! just didnt really want to lose her as i did/ still do love her i guess Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 I use the shoe analogy.... If you have a pair of shoes that pinch, rub, give you blisters, hurt, don't fit and make your feet ache... are you going to throw them in the back of the cupboard, forget about them, and then take them out 6 months later, hoping they will be a miraculous perfect fit, then? Nah, thought not..... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 hi My ex said she loves me when we broke up, strage right? she also said that she is 99% sure we will end up back together, she even promised. and then made me promise i would hold her to it even though she wanted to break up to let her hair down. how should i look at this? If she loved you, she wouldn't take the chance of losing you by breaking up. She doesn't truly love you. What she meant by she is 99% sure you guys will be back together is that she is 99% sure that YOU will be there waiting for her while she has her time to go see if there is anything better out there. You should tell her straight up that if she wants to do this that you are done and moving on. You will not wait around for her to decide. You are playing by her rules. You need to tell her what YOU want and how this will go down if she leaves. You think you know her. We all thought we knew our ex's very well. Turns out we didn't, that's why we're not together with them. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
lil hoodlum Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 People who say, I will probably regret this, usually do. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 thats what i thought! but she said that she wouldnt do anything she just wanted to be able to have the option to. She wants you to be there for her when she is done doing whatever she wants [being with someone else most likely] ... be her option, to make her feel good about her attractiveness and options overall. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 You're the back up plan. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Marco Valerio Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 (edited) She wants to keep you around for a while, until she finds someone else so she can kick you ass right away. If she loved you and wanted marrying you in the future, she wouldn't be dumping YOU!!!! Edited January 18, 2015 by Marco Valerio Link to post Share on other sites
Author jake2495 Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 She wants to keep you around for a while, until she finds someone else so she can kick you ass right away. If she loved you and wanted marrying you in the future, she wouldn't be dumping YOU!!!! she did say shed marry me in 2-3 years, and she said shes thought about the future, apparently i text her to much and she thinks being broken up will allow her to realise its not all bad being with me! Link to post Share on other sites
legion113 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 and maybe having another dick in her will make her realize having your's in her wasn't too bad either? C'mon man, boot this chick, she's playing you... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lawbstar Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 Love is not something you have to question. Love is something simple that you feel. If she really did love you, she would not have to leave you to realize that it is not bad being with you. If she loved you, she would have never left. Someone who loves you will not leave you. I think you and I are on similar boats. My ex told me 3 months ago that she still loved me too and that this might not be the end. However, I think that we are being stringed along, and the best thing that you can do for yourself is to keep your head up and walk the other way. You deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you, not with someone who wants to keep you as a safety net. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
evanescentworld Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 she did say shed marry me in 2-3 years, and she said shes thought about the future, apparently i text her to much and she thinks being broken up will allow her to realise its not all bad being with me! And what are YOU supposed to do, in those 2 - 3 years? Wait around, twiddling your thumbs, until she reappears on your doorstep? Oh, please.... What would her reaction be, if you said to her, "Fine! You go your way, and do whatever you need to do, and we'll meet up again in a couple of years. I'm fine with that, and I think you're quite right to do what you're doing... Oh, by the way, I'm gonna get me some chick to do a bit of foolin' around, myself.... nothing sexual, of course - just like you won't - but I figure we both deserve to get out and see what's out there, yeah?" Watch her face change.... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jake2495 Posted January 18, 2015 Author Share Posted January 18, 2015 i believe her as much as i dont want to i do. its just something thats been a problem quite regular during it is that i was texting her to much. so i guess it got to much! im happy atm i just want her back as well! im happy being her friend as then i know where i stand! whatever happens happens! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts