My story

[NightsEcho]

Hey all, I came to this site and browsed what you all have had to say. I would really like to here your opinions on this one and let me know what you think.

My girlfriend and I met in Grade 12...you know the whole high school sweetheart story and all that. We got along great, I was new to the whole being 18 and an adult, and she stood by me. Over the next year life was great....we hung out almost everyday. She was somewhat insecure about life and things but I attribuited that to her age (17) we did it all she went to my Graduation...then I went to hers. Unfortuantley the day came when couples must part..and I went off to University. We made it through the next year okay....a little rough in spots...but i was always there for her. When I came back for the summer it was amazing. Then I had to leave for another year. This year was different. The distance felt longer...the small things (calling everynight, seeing each other every weekend) became harder. Not that I didnt want to see her, but life can really pile it on at times. In Oct. she asked for a break, I had no choice. But that never really happened we were together the next day. Then we had a miserable X-mas and decided to take a break again....this only lasted a couple days. I think we were both afraid to let go. When I came back for spring break it was like she didnt want to see me. Our sex life was dead and buried and she always had a reason not to be with me. The day I got back to school she dumped me.

Now I am missing one point, she is a strict christian and we tended to disagree on certain things....but over time as I reconnected with the church our viewpoints were one in the same...I think she always felt this was an issue.

So when she dumped me....I took it with a grain of salt. We still talked to each other, she just said she needed space. She has huge pressures with her job and everything right now, but I did tell her I loved her, and that any problems we may have I was willing to work on. I know what a cliche it is but you dont really know what you have until its gone. She would tell me she loved me and that she was afraid she was making the worst mistake of her life. But if we were to take it to the next level she needed space. Well fastforward one month...we still talked and stuff, but I am getting a little bonkers, I have been there for her and she for me. As much as I want her to love me I now realize I cant. I have backed off on calling and my friends and family think I should go into NC. My opinion of NC is that it is just away to protect the dumpee and make them move on, is that really the best...no matter what I want her to know I am here for her. Anyway I will try it out for a few days.

Also, just so you know, I never cheated on her, never even thought about it. Never physically or emotionally abused her. Maybe a little guilty of taking her for granted. Well I have been using this as a way to learn and make myself better. I work out, Tan, and have tried to focus on school and connecting with the church.

I hope that she is my soulmate, my First real love and we can have a magical reunion one day. I hope she sees me as a good guy the most, and one that brings a smile to her face. Anyway, unleash away I need your thoughts and prayers

~jay

[NiCoLe20]

aww im sorry whats going on right now but the most you can do is just to back off and establish the no contact. Im sure things will turn out good in the end because its mainly the distance thats keeping you's apart. just keep the no contact going for a couple weeks/months and have her contact you FIRST. if she doesnt in that given time, then you know it wasnt meant to be. so for now just have fun with your friends and meet new girls! it'll be hard but you can do it

[NightEchos]

So an update.

I went 3 days NC and she called all friendly and started telling me about her last few days and asked about lots of stuff. I stayed strong and just said that everything was going okay. I was working out again and getting involved with the church lots. She sounded happy about this. I also said that I agreed the breakup was needed and that I loved her and If I wanted a good relationship we couldnt keep going the way we were. Anyway, I know have an oppurtunity to move back and take a summer coop that would bring me home for 8 months. Should I tell her or still pull back. I'm going Crazy! AHHHHHHHHH.

Anyway please post away

[tegteg]

All tho i am havin prob. of my own, i think that your on the right track... If she called you and is making contact with you, then that is a good thing, no matter how you look at it IMO... All tho dont take it to like shes back into you... I wouldnt say anything tho... Keep on with NC IMO and keep the talk bout the same, and try to joke bout certin things that you 2 have done, nothing to overboard tho....

 

HTH

DG