Atmosphere77 Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 After reading many posts, I find it amusing that the dumper in most cases has someone already lined up for them to make an easy jump to. The dumpee though usually chases and degrades themselves. Anything to try and save the relationship. So why is it the dumpee ends up the one who feels weak and pathetic? Link to post Share on other sites
lawbstar Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 I think that in the general case, dumpers have moved on and let go before the dumpees have. Also, in many cases, like you said, dumpers leave because there is someone else in the picture. Thus, dumpers don't look as weak and pathetic as the dumpees because dumpers have someone else to hold on to and continue their life with. Whereas for dumpees, they tend to feel like they are left alone in the world. They may feel like they are left alone to pick of the pieces of what is shattered. Dumpees are sometimes blindsided by breakups, so they are fragile. These reasons may be why dumpees appear to be weak and pathetic. However, I don't like describing dumpees in this way. Sometimes I like to think that dumpees are just hurt and feel betrayed. Link to post Share on other sites
sober and dry Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 Yeah lawbstar I do think it's like that in general, but I can also think in many, many possible situations where the roles can be different. Link to post Share on other sites
KBarletta Posted January 23, 2015 Share Posted January 23, 2015 After reading many posts, I find it amusing that the dumper in most cases has someone already lined up for them to make an easy jump to. The dumpee though usually chases and degrades themselves. Anything to try and save the relationship. So why is it the dumpee ends up the one who feels weak and pathetic? I have been on both sides of this, and while it sucks either way, it's usually harder to accept being rejected than it is to be the one who walks away. When you choose to walk away, there is power in making that choice. When you are left behind, shocked, alone and confused, there's no power there. Link to post Share on other sites
erklat Posted January 23, 2015 Share Posted January 23, 2015 Karma always bites you in the a$$. Rejoice in knowing that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Jewels7 Posted January 24, 2015 Share Posted January 24, 2015 I hear the karma thing all the time even for me. I was the dumper (but felt like the dumpee) because my ex was so toxic and bad for me and just not very nice. Leaving was the hardest choice I ever had to make and I still hurt 8 months on. But who is karma supposed to hit here? Me because according to him "I just walked away and love doesn't run" or him because he treated me like $h*t? Link to post Share on other sites
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