Feel like I'm on a spiral downwards. Don't know how to climb out of it.

[mrs rubble]

The last few weeks my self-esteem has really plumetted. I take things people say way too much to heart and get myself stuck in a very negative headspace.

It really started to get to me about 2 weeks ago when a friend said "You know if you lost "all that weight" you'd have no boob's left." A week ago, the same friend was sitting around with a group of us and said, she wished she had bigger boobs (like mrs rubble), another friend said "Oh god no you don't!! big boobs are hidious disgusting things.", then another friend said "Mrs rubble, how do you feel about your boobs?" I couldn't answer I was so embarassed and upset that I'd been singled out over my hidous boobs, that I just ignored the question. This has been on my mind since.

My aunt died suddenly mid last year, I really loved her and miss her heaps. My cousins are missing her too- I'd be surprised if they didn't. I've tried several times to reach out to them, to talk, invite them to meet up and I'm met with a stone wall. None of them will even acknowledge me. While I understand their grief is probably the cause of this, it hurts to see them respond to others, but never me.

My partner is always telling me how much he loves me and cares for me, and how how thinks I'm beautiful etc. Maybe he says it too often- it doesn't really seem sincere to me anymore. Given the fact that my friends have been making comments about my hidious boobs and weight, plus my partner confessing to "always having had a thing" for the lady we're planning on seeing this weekend. I feel like running away.

 

Can anyone help me out here?

[kolleamm]

I think losing weight would help your self esteem, although I know it's easier said than done.

 

I would make that a priority.

On the side I would recomned to find some hobbies you could really build on, not wine tasting or bs like that, something you really like to do, even if it requires money as most do.

 

I believe in you, now believe in yourself.

 

You have to do something different for your life to change. We've all been there don't worry.

[mrs rubble]

I think losing weight would help your self esteem, although I know it's easier said than done.

 

I would make that a priority.

On the side I would recomned to find some hobbies you could really build on, not wine tasting or bs like that, something you really like to do, even if it requires money as most do.

 

I believe in you, now believe in yourself.

 

You have to do something different for your life to change. We've all been there don't worry.

 

Thank you. :-)