Sugar-n-Spice Posted March 4, 2001 Share Posted March 4, 2001 I have been talking to this guy for a year. We kissed several times six months ago. We haven't kissed since. Within this year I have developed feelings for him that extend beyond friendship. I really care about him and I have feelings of love for him. I am not sure how he feels about me and he doesn't seem like the kind of person who will express his feelings (if he has any for me) before I express mine for him. Should I tell him how I feel? And if I should tell him, what is the best way to tell him without scaring him away? Personally, I feel that I should tell him because I feel it's best to be honest with him. I would appreciate any thoughts or suggestions that anyone might have. Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 4, 2001 Share Posted March 4, 2001 This is always such an awkward situation to face...but it absolutely does need addressing. You really can't move forward with your life until you sort of resolve this. I've been there myself and know just how you feel. There is no great way to do this if he isn't putting out any hints or vibrations at all about how he may feel. But he very well may be having identical feelings to yours. Probably the best thing to tell him would be during the normal course of a conversation, preferably in person, that you really think a great deal of him and that if he ever felt like he would like to upgrade the friendship you would be open to that. That's really all you need to say. You may be able to tell from his reaction what his feelings are. Of course, if he's as tight with his feelings as you say, you may have to get a little bit more into it or you may have to bring it up again another time. It's really too bad you didn't get into this subject six months ago when you were kissing. That would have been an ideal time. But the fact that you have been slightly romantic sort of opens things up a little more. You need to do this and do it soon. You also need to stop being such a close, available friend to him. If there's going to be romance, you can't be his buddy...the two just don't go together...until after you've been together a bit. You have definitely got to turn this into a romantic situation. Good luck. A lot of times these things work out well. But if he doesn't seem to be interested for one reason or another, you will have to decide whether or not you want to continue a close relationship with him. It is NOT in your best interests to be a close platonic friend with someone for whom you have greater feelings. That is being pretty cruel to yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Sugar-n-Spice Posted March 4, 2001 Share Posted March 4, 2001 Tony, You advice is sounds very good. I think that I will take your advice. Thanks so much for your help. Link to post Share on other sites
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