Online dating: Being a 5ft 8 man is repulsive to women.

[Mangina]

Why continue doing the same thing thinking it will one day work out for you? Quit letting women tell you about all their problems. You choose to be that guy, then get upset that you are that guy.

 

 

 

The answer to that is to quit using dating sites.

 

.

 

I don't do it because I think it will one day work for me. I don't even know what they are going to say when I answer. It's either hey were going to the lodge meet us there or they start to rant and cry about crap. I don't know what is on their mind before I pick up. They are my friends what I'm I supposed to tell them? I can tell them how stupid they are but it won't make any difference they are not going to change they just call me to vent.

 

I met both my girlfriends online. dating sites are the only way for me to find someone willing date me. I don't have superficial standards like most guys have, I can't afford to. I have to look at what's on the inside.

[True Gent]

Hello, LSers. I'm new here.

 

I'm kind of in the same boat of as you, Moy.

 

I opened up to someone whom I felt very compatible with. We share the same interest, we laugh at the same things, we share similar views with regards to politics and religion, and more importantly we just love each other's company. We only differ in that she likes to workout at the gym, while I don't.

 

Her response to me was, while she likes me as a friend, I'm not the type she'd "mate" with. Yes, she used the word "mate." Read more about it here if you'd like. Then she proceeds to describe her ideal reproductive partner: an Alpha type, taller than 5'8," dark and with facial hair. None of which describes me. I wanted to die right there and then. I can't control the physical traits I'm born with!

 

Having to listen to that was very emasculating and is taking a toll on my self-esteem.

 

Alas, I've no advice to give. But, know that you're alone in this struggle.

 

Come on! That's (ONE) girl!

 

You think you're really compatible, but she isn't seeing it that way. She has a type she won't budge on. That's her limiting he potential "mates", by passing up a good opportunity due to her physical ideals.

 

In her deffence, people don't choose what they find physically appealing, you just do or don't fancy someone initially.

 

Pick yourself up and dust yourself off. Life isn't easy when it comes to love. That what makes finding it special!

[True Gent]

Seriously Moy.

 

I think what you need to do is concentrate on your lack of confidence and also change the people around you. Anyone living with this sort of negativity all the time will go mad!

 

You need to find good people, people who are not going to treat others this way. Get yourself out of the damned gutter. This all sounds like an episode of Eastenders.

 

I haven't spent much time up north but I have never known people to be this way. Whenever I have been up there the people have been welcoming, friendly and in general lovely. With just a few a-holes mixed in for good measure. This says to me that you are meeting the wrong sort of people and going to the wrong sort of places.

 

People who are good and nice avoid people who are bastards (no matter what sex), its how you end up with the rough bars and pubs. Hence you need to go where the better people are going to meet them.

 

Bad People are the ones who;

Make negative comments about others

Druggies

Alcoholics

People who start fights

People who are selfish

People who are spiteful

 

Good People are the ones who;

Make positive comments about others

Enjoy life and smile

Don't over do it on the booze etc

Walk away from fights

Are generous with time and other resources that they may have

Don't hold any truck with nasty people and walk away

 

If you get a whiff of nasty behavior walk away from it no matter what the sex or who it is from. Do not get involved in it do not accept it. Move on and go somewhere else. You do not have to accept this from anyone. You do not have to spend your time with this.

 

How about this weekend seeing if your mates will out out for a meal and a couple of beers in a quieter pub, perhaps not one in the city, but try one in an outlying village for a change?

 

Whilst I agree largely with what you are saying, I don't think it's fair to put people with addiction problems in the "bad people" category.

 

Sometimes things spiral out of control due to negative experiences/depression or many other things. It doesn't mean that a dependency or addiction to something makes someone bad by default. It's not that black and white.

[salparadise]

Whilst I agree largely with what you are saying, I don't think it's fair to put people with addiction problems in the "bad people" category.

 

Sometimes things spiral out of control due to negative experiences/depression or many other things. It doesn't mean that a dependency or addiction to something makes someone bad by default. It's not that black and white.

 

Eh, does this mean we're going to debate the definition of "bad?" Using that logic you could reason that the Asmat aren't bad people, they just engage in rituals that we don't agree with. But if you're their guest and they're stoking the fire under the cauldron, you might see it differently.

[DukeNukem47]

Hello, LSers. I'm new here.

 

I'm kind of in the same boat of as you, Moy.

 

I opened up to someone whom I felt very compatible with. We share the same interest, we laugh at the same things, we share similar views with regards to politics and religion, and more importantly we just love each other's company. We only differ in that she likes to workout at the gym, while I don't.

 

Her response to me was, while she likes me as a friend, I'm not the type she'd "mate" with. Yes, she used the word "mate." Read more about it here if you'd like. Then she proceeds to describe her ideal reproductive partner: an Alpha type, taller than 5'8," dark and with facial hair. None of which describes me. I wanted to die right there and then. I can't control the physical traits I'm born with!

 

Having to listen to that was very emasculating and is taking a toll on my self-esteem.

 

Alas, I've no advice to give. But, know that you're alone in this struggle.

 

It sounds like you just wasted too much time on that girl. That's why I usually just ask the girl out right away. Some want to get to know you first, which is fine. Just get to know them while on dates, as opposed to hanging out as friends.

 

If you ask the girl out and she shoots you down, then that's it. Move on with little investment. Easy peasy.

[DukeNukem47]

Whilst I agree largely with what you are saying, I don't think it's fair to put people with addiction problems in the "bad people" category.

 

Sometimes things spiral out of control due to negative experiences/depression or many other things. It doesn't mean that a dependency or addiction to something makes someone bad by default. It's not that black and white.

 

People with addictions are not "bad". However, they are undateable....at least to me.

[Moy]

My needles/syringes and sharps bin are getting delivered today. Hopefully I can start to cultivate an attractive physique. And before you ask, I've been lifting like a beast, 5 times a week for years and that STILL isn't enough for me to receive nothing but contempt and disgust from women.

[Toodaloo]

My needles/syringes and sharps bin are getting delivered today. Hopefully I can start to cultivate an attractive physique. And before you ask, I've been lifting like a beast, 5 times a week for years and that STILL isn't enough for me to receive nothing but contempt and disgust from women.

 

Moy please don't.

 

Please don't change yourself any more than you already have. You have a great body, a gorgeous smile just no confidence or self esteem. Needles are not going to change that.

 

Think about it. You are about to start sticking needles in you for women who are vile? How about continuing to eat well and exercise for yourself?

 

You are near the wrong sort of women.

[Moy]

Moy please don't.

 

Please don't change yourself any more than you already have. You have a great body, a gorgeous smile just no confidence or self esteem. Needles are not going to change that.

 

Think about it. You are about to start sticking needles in you for women who are vile? How about continuing to eat well and exercise for yourself?

 

You are near the wrong sort of women.

 

I've been eating well and exercising hard for years......and I'm labelled undateably ugly in spite of this. Cosmetic surgery and steroids are the only route that I have out of being deemed disgusting.

 

Blame your sisters who have corrupted the rules of the game with their delusion, not the disadvantaged 'players' who need to go to extreme measures just to make entry level attractiveness in their eyes.

 

Google 'Alpha Male Beta Male Dating' 'Female hypergamy' and 'LMS Looks money status'

 

A LOT of good men are going to die alone.

[guest569]

What exactly you are injecting? ...

[guest569]

Blame your sisters who have corrupted the rules of the game with their delusion, not the disadvantaged 'players' who need to go to extreme measures just to make entry level attractiveness in their eyes.

 

Oh please. I think you need more counseling..

 

Yeah cause most women go after huge steroid users? Where are you getting this from? Get a grip man.

[Moy]

Oh please. I think you need more counseling..

 

Yeah cause most women go after huge steroid users? Where are you getting this from? Get a grip man.

 

Not all steroid users are huge. There are many kinds that produce a more lean and ripped effect. You think those Hollywood actors who women swoon over who change shape drastically in an UNNATURALLY AND IMPOSSIBLE space of time do it just through protein shakes and personal trainers?

 

A ripped physique gets female interest. Then, and ONLY then do you qualify as being allowed to have a personality. I see ripped men from the gym with girlfriends. I see me celibate and isolated for years on end, with nothing but hateful insults from the dating scene ringing in my ears.

[guest569]

Haha yeah, ok you obviously know what women want. Knock yourself out. We want men who are obsessed with their bodies and what other people think of them, and who blame women for all of their problems.

[Moy]

Haha yeah, ok you obviously know what women want. Knock yourself out. We want men who are obsessed with their bodies and what other people think of them, and who blame women for all of their problems.

 

Arsed what you think.

[guest569]

Arsed what you think.

 

There's nothing wrong with you on the outside. You're already a fit and attractive guy. I think steroids and cosmetics are a waste of time because that isn't where the problem lies.

 

"arsed what you think" should also apply to all these weird women who complain about your height or whatever else.

[Toodaloo]

I've been eating well and exercising hard for years......and I'm labelled undateably ugly in spite of this. Cosmetic surgery and steroids are the only route that I have out of being deemed disgusting.

 

Blame your sisters who have corrupted the rules of the game with their delusion, not the disadvantaged 'players' who need to go to extreme measures just to make entry level attractiveness in their eyes.

 

A LOT of good men are going to die alone.

 

Please wait. Please give the counselling a bit longer and try the suggestions we have made.

 

Sadly there are women out there who are absolute bitches just as there are men who are complete toss pots.

 

You have one sister here who has given you compliments where they are due and tried to support you. You have other sisters on this thread who agree with me! There are many more like us. Get yourself to a good place and find people like us rather than settling for the dregs of the world.

 

Many good people will die alone unless they get brave enough to accept who they are and walk away from the things in life that cause them upset and harm.

 

Please don't do this.

 

Your problems are not physical. Your problems are low self esteem which the bitches and bullies of this world are picking up on and eating at. It will not change through plastic surgery or injecting yourself to make yourself bigger and more muscular. It will only get worse. Stop this drama. Take steps to feel more positive about yourself.

 

Please don't do this.

[Revolver]

Men want smaller partners so they can physically dominate them in the bedroom, women want bigger partners so they can be dominated in the bedroom.

[Imported]

It's not going to work OP. I'm all about working out and aesthetics.....without steroids, but I think you already look good enough to get positive responses from women. The fact that that is not happening would indicate you have other problems. Hell, reading your post indicates you got other problems.

 

You do what you're planning, I predict more of the same. Probably even worse because you tried even harder (doing the same **** that didn't work the first time) and it didn't work and then you're gonna mentally break down again.

 

Sure, being lean and muscular will get pussy juices flowing.........if you have a good attitude, speak well, behave confidently, go after what you want and a seemingly deaf ear to haters .

 

I mean, seriously. A girl told you you're repulsive and you totally broke down over it. Get over it. Its not the end of the world. Find a girl that thinks you're hot. They're out there, trust me.

 

Only girls that ever put me down like that were morbidly obese and really really ugly. At no point did I consider them attractive in any way. I could explain more, but don't have the time, other than to say I really don't care what they think. I think you said it was the same for you....and that's what made it really bad....for you. Because even fat ugly chicks find you repulsive.

 

Its still your attitude man. Those chicks know you don't actually like them but are just that desperate and I would have to agree that that is repulsive.

[elaine567]

People who tend to put other people down all the time or are particularly nasty have issues themselves that need looked at. I really don't think it is helpful to suggest "morbidly obese" and "really ugly" women are more prone to being abusive though. I don't think we should get into the territory of any particular group being prone to say bad things.

I think there are people in every group you could name, that will try and ruin a person with nastiness.

I have been in the company of some very beautiful looking people who have had razor sharp tongues too, designed to cut to the quick and demean people.

 

It is usually a minority of people who will voice their negative opinion with no provocation, but I will have to say that a lot of women will retort with sharp barbs if they feel they are being attacked or insulted.

 

Moy, nothing on the pics you have posted re your appearance, explains your poor rate of success with women, but your increasingly poor attitude may explain a lot, sorry to say.

[True Gent]

Eh, does this mean we're going to debate the definition of "bad?" Using that logic you could reason that the Asmat aren't bad people, they just engage in rituals that we don't agree with. But if you're their guest and they're stoking the fire under the cauldron, you might see it differently.

 

I won't waste any of my time responding to your logic. You know what I was saying...

[BlueIris]

…

I'm caring, loving, loyal, humourous, hardworking, got my own house etc,

…

Is there ANY way out of this?

 

Emphasize and promote those traits, not your physical traits. Don’t post “look how hot I am” photos. Don't write about fitness and working out etc. Select women who demonstrate that they have the same traits. If you aren’t choosing women for their character and personality, rethink your goals. Do you want attention or a loving long term relationship or marriage? From what I've read here and what I experienced when doing OLD, it seems that the people most concerned about looks are the least happy.

[elaine567]

Emphasize and promote those traits, not your physical traits. Don’t post “look how hot I am” photos. Don't write about fitness and working out etc. Select women who demonstrate that they have the same traits. If you aren’t choosing women for their character and personality, rethink your goals. Do you want attention or a loving long term relationship or marriage? From what I've read here and what I experienced when doing OLD, it seems that the people most concerned about looks are the least happy.

 

Agreed "caring, loving, loyal, humourous, hardworking" and financially stable women will not be in the least bit bothered about the size of guns or ripped physiques.

[Imported]

Agreed "caring, loving, loyal, humourous, hardworking" and financially stable women will not be in the least bit bothered about the size of guns or ripped physiques.

 

I disagree. Sort of. I think you don't have to have a great body, something "acceptable" will work, but trust me...options do open up when you have a great body (lean, muscular..looks 'promising' under clothes and not ape like...not obvious. Looks sexually appealing naked..will make girls smile and look down all nervous with anticipation damn near everytime). And that's with every girl. The ones that are commanders in the military, the waitress, PhD student, hair cutters, lawyers, young, old..er, it doesn't matter. Sometimes you just get lucky. All the time.

 

 

It comes down to how you present yourself though. Do you wear your 10 year old brothers t-shirt to show how ripped you are? I guess that's OK if you're in New Jersey, but generally stuff like that should be avoided. It's always better to appear closer to upper-normal, with hints that you exceed even that than it is to be an obvious freak (I must eat 6000 calories a day or my muscles get smaller. I don't run, because it makes my muscles smaller, it affects growth!).

 

 

Subtle quality, a refined look and a humble but firm demeanor.

 

 

But whatever works for you OP.

[salparadise]

I won't waste any of my time responding to your logic. You know what I was saying...

 

Yea, I know what you're saying. That people with addictions get a pass because it may not have been their fault, or it happened due to unfortunate circumstances beyond their control.

 

But that still doesn't make them good relationship prospects. The same factors are true for people with mental illnesses, pervasively negative attitudes, abusive tendencies, etc. Knowingly getting involved with an addict is not a good idea, and I think almost everyone understands that logic.

[elaine567]

I disagree. Sort of. I think you don't have to have a great body, something "acceptable" will work, but trust me...options do open up when you have a great body (lean, muscular..looks 'promising' under clothes and not ape like...not obvious. Looks sexually appealing naked..will make girls smile and look down all nervous with anticipation damn near everytime)..

 

And from his pics doesn't Moy already look like that?

Steroids and plastic surgery won't improve his chances any, was my point, as many women are not really obsessed with huge guns and extremely ripped bodies IRL.

Some men are obsessed with bigger and "better" gym/steroid/supplement generated bodies, not all women are.

Once you get past the lean and muscular - nice, the more extreme look is not that appealing visually. It takes a huge amount of time to maintain (time that could be spent with her) and shows a narcissistic tendency that many woman would see as a red flag.