Online dating: Being a 5ft 8 man is repulsive to women.

[Nikki Sahagin]

My bf is 5'7. I'm 5'5. His height has never been an issue for me. My previous bfs have been between 5-8-6'2. I honestly like my now bfs height the best; when we cuddle, my head can rest exactly on his shoulder; no awkward neck craning.

[wb1988]

OP I'm 5'9" and never had issues, I doubt 1 inch makes such a big difference!

 

Something I've noticed in the UK that the US doesn't have would be the lack of 'mean girls'. Thankfully I've never been a victim but in the UK there is a very small minority of women that are both incredibly mean and attractive that also go for guys rather than only chose to attack girls. It's happened a few times when I'm walking with a few friends and out of no where a girl (again, pretty attractive) verbally attacks one of them without reason. Also there have been a few times when I've been on dates or with a gf and they suddenly mock some innocent old guy. Maybe OP experienced these women.

 

OP, so you get a few rejections and hate mail on OLD and suddenly you feel bad about yourself? Like really? Who gives a f**k about those girls. Even if you were tall that means dating a girl like that would be dating someone incredibly superficial which almost always goes hand in hand with other character flaws.

 

there is a lot of truth to it. there have been a lot threads were girl post and say they have never dated a guy under 5'10" or 6'

 

Yes, every pretty girl on match has at least 5'10" for a height requirement. almost all of them.

 

i am 5'8" and not very handsome, but i have never gotten these insults moy is getting. I live in the US so it could be the people.

 

I think every girl I've dated would be the type that say they would never date under 6ft, and I'm 5'9". I'm still a firm believer that although height is a big factor it is not the only factor. Most of the guys on TV that girls are into (Zac Efron, Johnny Depp, Dave Franco, Mario Lopez etc) are all my height or shorter. A hot girl isn't going to turn down a facially aesthetic 5'9"er nor is she going to say yes to 6'2" guy with a busted up (or maybe even average) face.

 

Where the US leads, the UK follows. Just as in the US, the standards of height being levelled at men in the UK is coming from women a large proportion of whom are overweight nigh on obese!

As a guy that travels between London and LA several times a year I can say that it's the same.

 

It probably also depends on where you live. If you live in a place like lets say Los Angeles, I'd like to think the women would be way more picky than if you live in some rural area.

Really, why use LA as an example? I think you've been seeing too many movies. LA has a lot of hot women and there is more competition. Sometimes when I'm at the gym and look at a group of women run on the treadmill I could swear that they're all subconsciously competing for the best body to get each others guy.

Edited February 18, 2015 by wb1988

[NJ123]

Really, why use LA as an example? I think you've been seeing too many movies. LA has a lot of hot women and there is more competition. Sometimes when I'm at the gym and look at a group of women run on the treadmill I could swear that they're all subconsciously competing for the best body to get each others guy.

 

Yes, of course there's more competition. And that was my point with the fact there's a lot of hot women in LA means the women will be more picky. Most hot women aren't going to settle for any average guy when their young. It's only until they get a bit older & are single will they get with the guy who can provide. If you live in a rural area that means less competition, which means women would be way less picky due to that. And from what I hear, the women in rural areas are a lot more friendly so they'll genuinely like a guy that treats them well.

[DukeNukem47]

Yes, of course there's more competition. And that was my point with the fact there's a lot of hot women in LA means the women will be more picky. Most hot women aren't going to settle for any average guy when their young. It's only until they get a bit older & are single will they get with the guy who can provide. If you live in a rural area that means less competition, which means women would be way less picky due to that. And from what I hear, the women in rural areas are a lot more friendly so they'll genuinely like a guy that treats them well.

 

I disagree. I live in a rural-ish area right now. Many of the women here are drug addicts. The ones that aren't have just as high of standards as women in cities (I've lived in both so I know).

 

Most women in general would rather have a tall man that treats her poorly or end up alone than date a short man. Short men should just develop other hobbies and stay away from women. It's what women want anyway.

[Mrs. John Adams]

My son is 5'8"...and is a policeman. He lifts weights and is built very well. He had more girlfriends than you can shake a stick at.

 

My Father is also 5'8"....and it was never an issue with him.

 

I am 5'1"...my mom is 5'2"...and my daughter in law is 5'3"

 

Maybe it is only an issue with certain kinds of people or personality types? But us short girls are just fine with 5' 8" fellas....and i don't think of 5'8" as short....I would love to be that tall!!!

[Gaeta]

A couple of years back I dated our bodybuilding national champion. He was 5'6''.I only had eyes for him and no 6' tall men got my attention. He completely eclipsed every man around him. I felt safer and sexier with him than I felt with my ex who was 6'4'' 250lbs.

[DukeNukem47]

A couple of years back I dated our bodybuilding national champion. He was 5'6''.I only had eyes for him and no 6' tall men got my attention. He completely eclipsed every man around him. I felt safer and sexier with him than I felt with my ex who was 6'4'' 250lbs.

 

Did you ever date a 5'6 guy that wasn't a bodybuilding national champion?

[Gaeta]

Did you ever date a 5'6 guy that wasn't a bodybuilding national champion?

 

Yes, I have seen for a period of time a man that was 5'6'' and not a body builder but in good shape normal guy. He was a nurse, handsome and smart. Unfortunately after 4 months dating he did not have enough time to give me a proper relationship so I had to move on. I had put a lot of hope in him, I would have loved it worked for us.

[Gaeta]

I am a confident woman. I got my own things to be proud of and I got my own success to build confidence from I don't need a tall man next to me to give me importance and to raise my value.

[Gaeta]

I posted too quickly.

 

Observe these women that absolutely want to have a man a foot taller than them. Often these women have not much control over many aspects of their life. No successful careers, no financial stability, many unrealized dreams, the only thing they have control of is picking a tall man that people around will say : Oh he's tall (as if it's an accomplishment) and that will give her a sense of value and success, which you and I know it's bogus but it's their motivation.

[elaine567]

The elephant in the room here is that the truth here, is not that short or average men (5'8 is pretty average) cannot get women, it is that SOME short/average height men cannot get women.

 

For these men, it is all about the vibes they give off, the stilted language, a poor grasp of the signs of interest,

the dreadful texting conversations, the desperation, the insecurity, the lack of confidence, the misogyny, the entitlement,

the PUA tricks, the emphasis on getting sex.... etc. etc.

i.e. the whole package, including I guess bad body language too, is just not that conducive to attracting good, honest women.

Edited February 18, 2015 by elaine567
grammar

[DukeNukem47]

The elephant in the room here is that the truth here, is not that short or average men (5'8 is pretty average) cannot get women, it is that SOME short/average height men cannot get women.

 

For these men, it is all about the vibes they give off, the stilted language, a poor grasp of the signs of interest,

the dreadful texting conversations, the desperation, the insecurity, the lack of confidence, the misogyny, the entitlement,

the PUA tricks, the emphasis on getting sex.... etc. etc.

i.e. the whole package, including I guess bad body language too, is just not that conducive to attracting good, honest women.

 

I think that many short men will naturally have a lack of confidence and everything that goes with that (desperation, insecurity, etc) because of how we're conditioned our whole lives.

 

If you constantly tell a person that they are inferior, they will begin to believe it.

 

Unfortunately, no one knows what it's like to be a short man in this society except for short men. And nobody cares what we think to begin with.

 

I would even go as far as calling a short man physically deformed. It's how we're looked at by the general public.

[NJ123]

I think that many short men will naturally have a lack of confidence and everything that goes with that (desperation, insecurity, etc) because of how we're conditioned our whole lives.

 

If you constantly tell a person that they are inferior, they will begin to believe it.

 

Unfortunately, no one knows what it's like to be a short man in this society except for short men. And nobody cares what we think to begin with.

 

I would even go as far as calling a short man physically deformed. It's how we're looked at by the general public.

 

I think that's the thing though. If it doesn't affect them than they have an outsiders opinion or they flat out just don't care because it's not them affected by it. I've heard short guys say time & time & time again where women would say "oh you're a great guy but if only you were taller" than get put in the friend zone. It doesn't always have to do with confidence or being a great guy. Some women just feel insecure by being with a short man. They think a tall man will "protect" them better or something I guess.

[somedude81]

The whole problem with this thread is that 5'8 hardly qualifies as short.

 

As a 5'5 man who has done horribly with women, I would love to be 5'8.

 

At 5'5 I am barely taller than the average women and very often I run into women who are my height or taller. There is an almost non-existent chance that a woman who is my height or taller would want to date me. A man who is 5'8 is taller than 95% of women and doesn't have that problem.

 

Yes it sucks being under 5'10 for OLD, but that's just where women can be there most shallow.

[DukeNukem47]

The whole problem with this thread is that 5'8 hardly qualifies as short.

 

As a 5'5 man who has done horribly with women, I would love to be 5'8.

 

At 5'5 I am barely taller than the average women and very often I run into women who are my height or taller. There is an almost non-existent chance that a woman who is my height or taller would want to date me. A man who is 5'8 is taller than 95% of women and doesn't have that problem.

 

Yes it sucks being under 5'10 for OLD, but that's just where women can be there most shallow.

 

Agreed. I'm around your height and 5'8 is definitely not short. Maybe short-ish.

 

But yeah, I would do way better with women if I was 5'8. OP doesn't know how good he has it.

[NJ123]

Let me ask you two, do you both consider yourself 5'5" with or without shoes on? My drivers license says 5'7" but I don't remember if that's with shoes on or not. I might be closer to 5'6".

Edited February 18, 2015 by NJ123

[somedude81]

Let me ask you two, do you both consider yourself 5'5" with or without shoes on? My drivers license says 5'7" but I don't remember if that's with shoes on or not. I might be closer to 5'6".

 

Without shoes of course.

 

I'm not like those women who say they are 5'7 in heels.

[NJ123]

Without shoes of course.

 

I'm not like those women who say they are 5'7 in heels.

 

Need to measure myself again since I always say I'm 5'7" but I might be even shorter possibly.

[BearMox]

<snip>I'm sick of it, it makes me feel useless about myself. I'm caring, loving, loyal, humourous, hardworking, got my own house etc, I work out and have 6 pack abs in my 40s, yet the mere mention of 5ft 8 renders me undateable.

 

sounds like you care about it. let go. you are more than enough. only shallow people judge a person by their physical appearance.

 

OLD does come with its share of vanity amidst its qualities, if any.

[Moy]

Without shoes of course.

 

I'm not like those women who say they are 5'7 in heels.

 

I HATE that 'My height in heels qualifies as a real height' mentality. I'm 5'8" in my bare feet. Hey, I can even qualify as 6ft if I raise my heels off the floor!

[Moy]

After a bit of Googling, I've discovered that I'm the same height as Mark Wahlberg and Robert Downey Jr. Just think, they'd both be bottom of the food chain if they were using OLD! Even Brad Pitt's barely 5'11"!

[Moy]

 

I can't recall your exact age OP (38? 40?) but now would probably be a good time to start leaning down a bit.

 

Personally I find it can look quite strange when a body is all big muscles and as people grow older their face tends to slim down so the face and bod don't quite seem to match.

 

Also, slowing things down with the exercise a bit would add a little fat which would plump out your facial features a little.

 

 

So you're saying that I should lay off the gym and fatten up a bit i.e. DELIBERATELY become a lesser person physically because SOME women might prefer it?

 

I'd rather be fit and single than deliberately sabotage my potential purely for the sake of the approval of others. That would be like asking a successful woman to take a lower paying job because I was intimidated by her earning potential.

 

I also post on diet and fitness forums. Many compliments about me on there......unfortunately, they all come from Americans and Canadians! (I'm in the UK)

Edited February 19, 2015 by Moy

[guest569]

Interesting that you would say that increasing body fat would make you a "lesser" person. Speaks volumes really.

[Moy]

Interesting that you would say that increasing body fat would make you a "lesser" person. Speaks volumes really.

 

Err.....no it doesn't. I want to be as healthy as possible, especially as I get older. I don't want to deliberately put weight on just to please others.

It wouldn't make me a lesser person, but it would make me a less healthy one. There is nothing wrong in me wanting to be as healthy as possible.

 

The fact that you've twisted what I said (I said lesser PHYSICALLY) along with your many snidey responses on this - and other threads - speaks more volumes about you than it ever will about me.

 

Haters gon' hate. As I said earlier in the thread, arsed what you think

[Toodaloo]

Hi Moy

 

I think what Smiley is trying to say is that you are clearly a very big, fit guy... That can be intimidating for some. At first glace you are massive! Very strong, very "beefed" up, very muscular. We women do not need to see you with out your shirt on to know that is what is under it. Its very obvious!

 

However, what may go through someones mind is "what would he ever see in me?" because the vast majority of us do carry a bit of fat and flabby bits...

 

You are still thinking in terms of physical appearance... That is what she is hinting at.

 

You are far more than just what you look like.