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Being stalked by BS


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Jesuischarlie

I told mm that his wife was deliberately winding me up. She is in my face constantly. The next day it was worse. She knows my car and she's following me. I am at breaking point. I am worried I might lose my temper. I don't think she knows I still see Mm albeit platonically. I have a feeling he may have told her I'm following him lol but I guess it's not funny.

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eye of the storm

Unfortunately, this is just one of the many dangers of dating a MM.

 

Some BSs take this very personally.

 

Good luck.

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Hold up.

 

Your MM's wife knows about the two of you, yet you STILL choose to continue seeing him? I doubt his wife cares whether it's "platonic" or not.

 

I ask you this not judgmentally, but 100% realistically. What in the world did you expect from a BS?

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You said she would do anything to keep her family together. 'At all cost'. Continued involvement with her husband could make you one of those cost. Seek out a restraining order if you feel threatened. He chose to stay married, they are a package deal.

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You need to keep yourself safe here, she is a woman enraged, a woman fighting for her family and her husband, and that should not be taken lightly.

Do not engage with her and if she is harassing you then get the police involved.

 

By continuing to see the MM, you are playing with fire here.

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Jesuischarlie

Do you think she's going to confront me? Maybe she's waiting to catch me alone. I won't go to the police as she's not committed a crime. I am sure she's crazy doing this.. I think she cannot get anywhere with Mm as he's turned to stone so she's trying to get somewhere by following me.

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Do you think she's going to confront me? Maybe she's waiting to catch me alone. I won't go to the police as she's not committed a crime. I am sure she's crazy doing this..

 

She probably thinks you're crazy for loving someone else's husband. Does she say anything to you?

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Hell Hath No Fury, like A Woman Scorned

 

Be afraid and take precautions. These are often what Dateline specials are about.

 

However *you* can end all this, go NC and take measures to ensure your safety and your/her sanity.

 

Good luck.

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Do you think she's going to confront me? Maybe she's waiting to catch me alone. I won't go to the police as she's not committed a crime. I am sure she's crazy doing this.. I think she cannot get anywhere with Mm as he's turned to stone so she's trying to get somewhere by following me.

 

I clicked on this prepared to offer sympathy. But you are making your own bed here. Stay away from her husband.

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Do you think she's going to confront me? Maybe she's waiting to catch me alone. I won't go to the police as she's not committed a crime. I am sure she's crazy doing this.. I think she cannot get anywhere with Mm as he's turned to stone so she's trying to get somewhere by following me.

 

Get where? He's already living with her.

 

Is it worth it to you to continue to see her husband knowing she is after you?

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I told mm that his wife was deliberately winding me up. She is in my face constantly. The next day it was worse. She knows my car and she's following me. I am at breaking point. I am worried I might lose my temper. I don't think she knows I still see Mm albeit platonically. I have a feeling he may have told her I'm following him lol but I guess it's not funny.

 

 

It got worse the day after you told him she's in your face. That certainly points to him telling her he spoke with you.

 

Who is winding who up?

 

How much is he enjoying having two women act like fools for him?

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I think she cannot get anywhere with Mm as he's turned to stone so she's trying to get somewhere by following me.

 

And who told you that, I wonder?

For all you know, he may be lavishing her with gifts, giving her great sex, is telling her he loves her, and is doing anything she asks, just so they are still together and she doesn't divorce him.

He is capable of lying to her, who says he is telling you the truth...

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She is in my face constantly. The next day it was worse. She knows my car and she's following me. I am at breaking point. I am worried I might lose my temper.

 

Don't be so sure that she can follow you and "get in your face" with impunity. I recommend seeing a lawyer to understand your options with respect to a restraining order. Based on the facts above, in California you would likely be able to get a restraining order. Stalking (variably defined) IS a crime and it is also civilly actionable in some states. Civil Stalking Laws by State (Also be aware a lawyer will almost certainly advise you to simplify your legal issues, protect your safety, and save your nerves by ending contact with the husband.)

 

The married couple who chooses to stay together is like a peanut butter sandwich. If you choose to see and talk to the "bread", you can't really avoid the "peanut butter" getting on you.

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evanescentworld
......

The married couple who chooses to stay together is like a peanut butter sandwich. If you choose to see and talk to the "bread", you can't really avoid the "peanut butter" getting on you.

 

I thought she WAS the peanut butter.... :confused:

 

(I'm not being flippant... It's the way I've heard it being described...

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Before you go to the law make sure you are not in a state where being the other women is against the law. There are still a few. Actually just heard of a case where ow was sued and named as public record as reason for divorce.

And if you don't like her following you don't give her a reason to. Behind most crazy women is a man that made her that way.

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Lemme get this straight...your MM is still with his wife and she is "stalking" you. Well, DUH! What did you think was going to happen?

 

And, yes, you should be very concerned. The last chick I knew messing around with a married man ended up with a vandalized house, slashed tires, broken car windows and lights, and then a broken jaw and a trip to the ER. My friend ended up drinking her meals for 6 months after the jaw surgery and the wife got a sympathetic judge who gave her a slap on the wrist probation. Which is when she started having her friends harass the OW.

 

Some women don't play. If you're going to have affairs with married men you better be able to take care of yourself because that's a hell of a risk to take.

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I think that too many OW's, get carried away with the A and forget what may happen if the A is exposed and how vulnerable that leaves them.

Most it appears cannot rely on any real support from the MM, who often retreats back into the marriage and deserts them.

Many cheaters are risk averse, they hate conflict so they stay in marriages and cheat rather than divorce and move on.

Faced with being found out, the cheater tends to side with the marriage and the wife, so that means the OW is left out in the cold to face whatever consequences come her way.

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whatatangledweb
I told mm that his wife was deliberately winding me up. She is in my face constantly. The next day it was worse. She knows my car and she's following me. I am at breaking point. I am worried I might lose my temper. I don't think she knows I still see Mm albeit platonically. I have a feeling he may have told her I'm following him lol but I guess it's not funny.

 

Do you mean she is actually in your face or that every time you drive around you see her car? Are you in a small town ?How long has it been going on? Sometimes we see someone or something everywhere we look because we are worried or afraid of it.

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He could leave her just like hundreds of married people leave their spouse and kids every day. He doesn't want to. He's staying. She might kick him out, but it doesn't sound like it. Even if she did, he'd probably just to play the field, not come to you except in between other women.

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Yeah I would say this is a consequence of getting involved with a married man. And still being involved, for that matter.

 

 

Your lack of empathy is a little disturbing.... you're an accomplice in blowing up her marriage... what did you expect?

 

 

She's probably being gaslit so is trying to find the truth of it... but hey youre the one hard done by, right?

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gettingstronger

Can you elaborate on what's she's doing? That may help. Your other posts show an extreme dislike of wives in general. Is it possible she's just going about her normal business but you hate her so the mere sight of her makes you upset?

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Yeah I would say this is a consequence of getting involved with a married man. And still being involved, for that matter.

 

 

Your lack of empathy is a little disturbing.... you're an accomplice in blowing up her marriage... what did you expect?

 

 

She's probably being gaslit so is trying to find the truth of it... but hey youre the one hard done by, right?

 

Two snaps!

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Jesuischarlie

I do think she's being gaslighted. Like I said. I would t be surprised if he said I'm following him.. But she cant be stupid. So no. I think she's deliberately intimidating me. And I've been seeing mm for 7 years almost daily. Never happened before. I think she's given up her job to save her marriage... Poor vache Remember BS this is an OW forum!!

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