Dlucio1 Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 (edited) My husband continues to blame me for his EA. It still haunts me so much and I am tired of the fights and all the blaming. He gets violently angry and he truly seems unhappy, yet he says he will not leave his children nor sell the house. He doesn't sleep with me anymore. He avoids me all the time and sleeps on the couch every night. He calls me names, and now seems angry that I'm finally going out and having a social life. He doesn't want me to do anything for him..but when he's mad, he will say I don't do anything for him. I'm also training for a 1/2 marathon. I'm doing things that make me happy, because I have low self esteem. Do u know what it feels like, when ur husband doesn't want sex with you? It's very painful. yet he makes me feel like I'm the worst wife ever. Now accusing me of cheating, when it's not true. I'm not a cheater and will nvr be. It's the worst thing u can do to someone you love. Idk why I forgave him? I have so much hate what he has done to me. If I mention the affair, he gets violent. Nvr had any healing. I'm considering legal separation. Idk much about it but my Heath is deteriorating staying with him. He's also complaining of me not helping him and he does it all, money, bills, cooking cleaning, etc. says now he is going to remove me from beneficiary , insurance etc and I should do the same. How can this man live with himself. He cheated with his very 1st gf, sent her money and told her he loved her for 27yrs then I forgave and he does this to me his wife?? When I tell him what he did to his family, he gets violent and makes me feel that I'm the worst wife in the world and I deserved it. Idk what to do. I work full time and help with the bills. I've nvr done anything evil to him. I don't understand his violence. Edited February 2, 2015 by Dlucio1 Link to post Share on other sites
2.50 a gallon Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 Run, Dlucio Run! He is blame shifting and will never change for you! Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 RUN. He's afraid of consequences for his cheating and is now trying to blameshift everything onto you. He has serious issues though seeing how he's turning violent as well. Seriously, flee from that house. Grab your kids and go to your parents or anywhere else and get a divorce lawyer while you're at it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Dlucio1 Posted February 5, 2015 Author Share Posted February 5, 2015 (edited) I know, this has been 2+yrs of blame and making me feel like Im the worst wife. He has always put blame on me. I know that he is ashamed deep down and can't man up about it. It doesn't help though every argument I mention the affair. This is what is going to break us up eventually because it makes him violently angry and distance himself even more, even denying sex. The other day after my run (im a new runner) on a Sat am I came home, showered, and got dressed. I told him I was going out. He became quiet. Then all of a sudden he asked my dtr to get him a bandaide because he was bleeding. I really think he did it to himself. I asked him, "do u want a bigger bandaide?" he was so angry and said "get away from me u Bit!" and he was spitting in the house. Said thats why he has not been sleeping with me cause he knows I have been cheating on him. WTH. He hasn't spoken to me since. Anyway if he doesn't care, why does he get jealous like this or angry? idk. It makes me so depressed. Then if we stop talking for days, then he is really nice. Wants to take the kids out to the movies, he starts approching me and asks me things about the kids. He knows eventually I'll start talking with him. But I think this is not going well with us because in my heart, he is not remorseful. And I really need him for once listen to me and understand the pain and everything I've been thru. He AVOIDS it totally. Never to speak about it again. His relationship with the OW was loving, sexual, and he was so darned caring to her, he even sent her money, not much, but some. I didn't recognize it was my husband. He was never so loving with me in all these yrs. I'll nvr be the same, I still love him though, I don't know why. He said everything he told her was a lie and he did it cause we were having so many problems, fighting, financial, afraid he was going to get laid off, etc. EXCUSES, EXCUSES. So thats why he said he did it. anyways, to me he still hasn't shown remorse. Edited February 5, 2015 by Dlucio1 Link to post Share on other sites
No Limit Posted February 6, 2015 Share Posted February 6, 2015 You are waiting for a wonder to happen which will never happen. Why are you still with him? Link to post Share on other sites
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