Why want my Ex leave me alone !!! ????

[sittingherealone]

I posted here 2 months ago. I'm 29, shes 28. She's bi-polar and borderline personality disorder. Long story short, her insecurities, trust issues and emotional abuse drove us apart.

Then, One night she called me and said she met someone. She said I wasn't affectionate and accused me of not loving her. She told me to move on and she was happy. The next day she posted on facebook her new b/f and how INLOVE she is. I told her it sucks to throw our 2.5 year relationship down the drain that easy but I understood. We agreed to leave each other ALONE ! So since Dec. 18th she has.....

Rumor she slept with my sisters ex boyfriend, numerous pictures of them partying

also she text me about once a week saying things like

#1 -Do you want me to drop rest of your things off on your porch ?

#2 - I miss your son, can I call and say hey to him

#3 - I think you gave me an STD. I'm going to doctor to get checked. tell me if you had one

#4 - I was negative for an STD

#5 - This break up must be hard on you since your ignoring me

#6 - I see you hanging out with your EX wife. Guess you have always wanted her back

Then she has went so far to, messaged my family members, granparents, aunts, uncles, daycare. Just chit chatting about her new job and how she misses my family and, how happy she is and how bad of a guy I was.

To top things off, she has added the last 2 girls I have met on facebook . she will like their photos and etc. She tried adding my Ex wife. She will like post I am tagged in with mutual friends, comment on my sons photos from mutual friends.

I have not given her a single ounce of attention or reply's. I dont understand !!! She has a new BOYFRIEND !!! why cant she just leave me alone ??? Is she truly not happy or missing me ????

 

It cost me $15 to block a number on my phone, so i am not paying to block her. j

[contact1]

She's just trying to get to you, get your attention and make you regret the break-up, that is all. Just keep ignoring her and tell your family to ignore her also, as you two are no longer together and you have no interest at all. She is just looking for anything to make it seem like it was you that was the problem and not her. Again just keep ignoring her.

[preraph]

Change phone numbers. Block her on facebook and everywhere else to get her out of your business. She has real mental health issues so you can't expect her to really just stop doing weird things. So you need to block her every way imaginable.

[sittingherealone]

Everything has been blocked, She signs on mutual friends facebook pages to stalk mine. Even my family has blocked her in the last few weeks. I guess that's why she is starting to add my Ex wife and girls I have dated in the last few months.

And, She left me !! She is the one who found a guy behind my back and told me to leave her alone because she was happy. I have granted her the wish.

A few other text she has sent in the past few weeks

#1 - I'm deleting pictures of us off my phone and facebook !"

#2 - Stop adding my mutual friends on facebook find your own friends

[Timshel]

Here's a clue. Ever notice in the past when you thought you were into something, let's for the sake of argument, golf, but then later found another hobby or interest that took your attention? Have you opened a thread about a past hobby because you thought it missed you?

Only 2 possible scenario's:

 

1. You are fretting and allowing it to fret you because you give a damm.

 

2. See 1.

 

People are under your skin only if you let them. Clearly, you are still entrenched in this drama while claiming otherwise.

At least be honest.

[sittingherealone]

I'm in this drama, slowly having people block her. But she keeps popping back up in my life and of course it will get under my skin. its been 2 months !!!

[Timshel]

I'm in this drama, slowly having people block her. But she keeps popping back up in my life and of course it will get under my skin. its been 2 months !!!

 

Of course you are. There is a physical block, which may take time. You said you would not pay $15 to block her but have become fairly hysterical. $15 is worth peace of mind if you want it.

 

Then there is the psychological peace of mind. You know that this is b.s. so how will you allow it to affect you?

 

Tailgating is something that can always get me amped. What a careless, unnecessary risk. This is when I practice what I believe.

What we let mess with us is on us. This is on you. I have sympathy but at the end of the day, this is on you.

Look at it as a test of your strength, love that. It will make you a calm, cool person.

[Quiet Storm]

For Borderlines, any attention, whether negative or positive is validating. So she is just trying to get any reaction out of you. Breakups, even if they themselves cause it, triggers their feelings of abandonment and it makes them do crazy things. My sister is a Borderline and I've been witness to this behavior countless times.

 

You are asking why and trying to make sense of her behavior, but she is just doing what Borderlines do. They are not rational, and in reality YOU are irrational for expecting a Borderline to behave like a well balanced person. She's not a normal or rational person, no matter how normal she can appear sometimes.

 

You would not expect a paralyzed person to get up and walk, and mental illness, while not visible, can be just as debilitating. She is behaving exactly as most would expect a Borderline to behave after a breakup....immature, emotional, dramatic, unbalanced, etc.

 

There are websites that can give you some good information on the best ways to detach from a Borderline.